Stains
by May La Nee
Summary: An elaborate series of events starring Ron and Draco. Will the hardship they will come to face be worth it? Will they get together? What the hell is going on? Slash. Collaboration with Synderska. Awesome. Read now. Rated M for your own safety.
1. Chapter 1: Unstained

**A/N: ****This story is going to be very long. It starts when the main characters are about 8 years old, and will end when they're just about in their twenties. It sticks to canon in big lines. We think we did a good job at keeping the main characters in character and having relationships develop gradually, which we both feel is important. **

**And people; w****e are not stupid. **

**We are European over-dramatic perverts who like to shock people and make connections that shouldn't be there. **

**In this fanfic you will find Harry-bashing, Ro****n/Hermione, Ron/Draco, Ron/Harry, Harry/Hermione, Draco/Rosaly, Draco/Pansy, Fenrir/Draco, and possibly even MORE strange pairings. We shall begin every chapter with the lyrics of a song that we think fits the chapter. Look them up – you'll soon have your own Stains playlist! Also, we put a lot of hints in the first chapters referring to the later ones. Please tell us when you think you spotted any. :D Happy reading!**

**-Melissa and Melanie**

I once had no fears  
None at all  
And then when  
I had some

To my surprise  
I grew to like both  
Scared or brave  
Without them

The thrill of fear  
Thought I'd never admit it  
The thrill of fear  
Now greatly enjoyed with courage

When I once was  
Untouchable  
Innocence roared  
Still amazes

When I once was  
Innocent  
It's still here  
But in different places

Neurosis  
Only  
Attaches  
Itself to  
Fertile  
Ground  
Where it can flourish

The thrill of fear  
Thought I'd never admit it  
The thrill of fear  
Now greatly enjoyed with courage

When I once was  
Fearless  
Innocence roared  
Still amazes

Untouchable  
Innocence  
It's still here  
But in different places

Fear is a powerful drug  
Overcome it and  
You think that you can do  
Anything!

Should I  
Save myself  
For later  
Or generously give?

Fear of  
Losing  
Energy  
Is draining

It locks up your chest  
Shuts down the heart  
Miserly  
And stingy  
Let's open up : share!

When I once was  
Fearless  
Innocence roared  
Still amazes

Untouchable  
Innocence  
It's still here  
But in different places

'Innocence' by Björk.

**"Ronald Billius Weasley! I told you to _behave_, didn't I?"**  
Molly's voice echoed through the entrance hall of Malfoy Manor as Ron came rushing in, thrilled to see his best friend again.  
"It's been a while, Molly," Narcissa Malfoy replied softly when the redhead ran by her, towards the large living room.  
Molly sighed. "I know, but still. I told him to behave, and… look what he's doing. I doubt Ronald is ever going to be an obeying child. His brothers..."  
Narcissa interrupted her. "Don't compare him to his brothers. They were the same at his age. After all, wasn't it _Percy_ who broke that vase?"  
Another sigh underlined Molly's dissatisfaction; "And you _know_ that I'm still sorry-..."  
"I do, but that wasn't where I was going. Ronald may not be an angel, his brothers didn't exactly have halos either. Now," Narcissa smiled gently and guided her friend to the living room.

When they entered, Ron was gone.  
"Where's-..."  
"He must have gone to Draco's room, Molly. Don't worry," Narcissa replied with a smile as she gave her friend a piercing look; "..why are you so fraught today?"  
Molly dropped her gaze and shook her head. "Oh, it's just - I was afraid we wouldn't meet again," Molly responded, holding back her tears.  
"Oh, by all means Molly- no tears before tea. Seat yourself, please," Narcissa said, before occupying one of the black leather armchairs. Molly nodded and placed herself opposite her friend.  
"Dobby," the hostess then commanded, and the elf appeared. "Yes, missus Malfoy madam, what would madam like?" the elf said, seeming slightly nervous.

"Serve our guest first, Dobby," Narcissa replied coldly.

"Yes madam!" Dobby squealed "Missus Weasley, welcome, how may Dobby help you madam? Would madam like something to drink?"

Molly didn't seem comfortable having an elf bow to her, but she didn't want to cause any trouble so she decided to ask for "some tea please, thank you." Dobby nodded enthusiastically at Molly's words, and when she was done he turned to Narcissa. "I, too, would like some tea"

"Yes madams," Dobby replied, bowing, before clapping his hands making a tea tray appear.

Dobby directed the teapot into filling fragile looking china cups. When that was done the cups landed to the table in front of both the ladies. Then Dobby made a tray of bonbons, cookies and cupcakes appear that also went to the table. He bowed again and was about to disappear when Narcissa made a guttural "hm?"

"Yes missus Malfoy madam?"

"Aren't you forgetting something…?"

Dobby looked at her as if she just Crucio'd him; "Oh! Dobby so sorry missus Weasley Madam Dobby didn't mean to forget! Dobby a bad elf! Bad bad Dobby! Dobby must- would madam missus Weasley like some milk or sugar in her tea?" the elf looked like he was about to cry as he fidgeted the dirty pillowcase he was wearing.

Molly seemed unsure of what to do, but she didn't want to cause a fuss with Narcissa either. Narcissa then sighed; "Dobby – Mrs. Weasley here is a _special_ guests… where is my liquor?"

Dobby finally seemed to catch up and nodded understandingly before bowing again; "Dobby so, so sorry Missus Malfoy madam," the elf then snapped its fingers and in no time there was a bottle of rum floating in thin air. He looked from Molly to Narcissa and back, before focussing his gaze on Narcissa's cup and adding some of the rum to her tea.

Molly looked at it speechlessly. When Narcissa spotted this, she smiled broadly; "Oh please, Molly, the kids are playing, the men aren't around… have some fun."

"Oh, I don't know…" Molly tried hesitantly but with a chuckle.

"I insist.. you can't have a lady drink by herself, can you? Just blame me," Narcissa then smiled so sweetly Molly couldn't refuse and allowed Dobby to add some to her tea as well.

"You're dismissed," the hostess then said to Dobby, and the elf disappeared with a bang. Narcissa levitated her cup over to her.

"Now, Molly, tell me what's the matter?" Narcissa asked kindly, her eyes glittering in the sun that shone through the high French windows. If it wasn't for the black furniture, the light rays would have made the room look golden.

"We managed to pay off the house, finally, and well...Arthur got a new position in the ministry. A better one,"  
Narcissa smiled in acknowledgement as she sipped her tea.

"He now works in the Misuse of Muggle Artefacts Office, you know, that's in the Department of Magical Law Enforcement... he seems happy with his new job. It's just...you know-" Molly paused, obviously struggling.

Narcissa got up, walking over to Molly and sat down beside her. Then she took her friend's hands in her own soft ones. A polite concerned smile was on her face when she looked her in the eyes and said; "please Molly, you know you can tell me anything. "

Molly, who was still looking down, suddenly looked up. "I missed you, Cissy," she then whispered, and tears started running down her reddened cheeks.  
"Oh, dear," Narcissa replied, as she gently embraced the other. "Lucius is going to be busy the upcoming months… It'll be like before, all right? It's ridiculous – we're grown women and-" Narcissa was interrupted by a loud noise.

Molly immediately cringed and looked at the door that lead to the rest of the immense interior of the house.

Ron appeared in the doorframe, his eyes wide and his face slightly pink.  
"Where's Drake?" he asked breathlessly as he stepped in the living room. "Didn't find him in his room," he added and bit his lower lip.  
"OH!" Narcissa exclaimed, and her eyes widened as much as Ron's did. "I'm so sorry Ronald. I completely forgot-…he's outside. In the garden, playing with the peacocks. You should find him there."  
Ron started to smile. Happily he nodded and ran to the French door. When he was just about to step out, he turned around.  
"Mum...are you crying?", he asked carefully and looked at the women.  
Molly chuckled; "No dear, I'm not crying. It's okay. Go out to Draco. I'm sure he missed you a lot."  
"You sure?" the boy asked again, his voice more concerned this time. "Yes, darling, yes. Go, I'm sure Draco is glad to see you again" Molly assured and smiled.  
As a reply Ron grinned at his mother and then hurried out.

**"Drake?"**  
Ron walked through the large garden that reminded him of the majestic garden of some French king. Him and his family visited France over a year ago because of his father's job. Otherwise he would probably never even heard of France. Of course they stayed in a hostel at the time- not even the ministry could afford a decent accommodation for a nine-headed family.  
"I'm over here," came a reply and Ron suddenly spotted his best mate, sitting in a tree far away from the manor, off the actual parcel. Or well, at least what Ron thought was the parcel. But who knew? It wouldn't have surprised him if entire England was property of the Malfoys...  
"What are you doing up there?" Ron asked when he finally arrived, looking up the tree and watching the boy carefully trying to climb down.  
"I have been watching that," Draco said and pointed a black spot in the pale blue sky. Ron looked up  
"Oh, that..." Ron said with a grimace.  
"Do you know what it is?" Draco asked the redhead without taking his eyes off the mysterious object that was slowly floating southwards.  
"Hrm...a bird, perhaps?" Ron replied hesitantly.  
"A bird?" Draco repeated and cocked a brow. He was now looking at Ron. "Wow, what happened to your hair?"  
"I know...," Ron mumbled, pressing his lips together, "Mum wanted to cut it...she likes it short you know..."  
Draco scoffed in reply as looked up again. "I think it's a hot-air balloon."

Ron eyed the black spot suspiciously. "What's that?"  
"You don't know what hot-air balloons are?" Draco asked, surprised by Ron's ignorance  
"No, but you do" the ginger replied, slightly annoyed.  
"Indeed, I do," Draco answered, slightly lifting his nose and feeling superior.  
"So... what are they?" Ron asked and looked back at the hot-air balloon curiously.

Draco was grateful Ron didn't notice his face flush. Of course Draco knew what hot-air balloons were –flying objects Muggles could be transported with- but he didn't really know what they looked like. He'd never seen any from up close before... He just knew that that slightly pear shaped black spot was one, even though he didn't know what size it had. And his Father strictly forbid him to fly up there on his broom to check it out, so there was no way he was finding out any time soon either.

"Well...erm…hot-air balloons look like...pears. They're rather boring," Draco replied in a low voice, hoping Ron wouldn't ask him further questions about Muggle-stuff. He climbed down.  
"Like pears?"  
"Yes,"  
"I hate pears,"  
"Why is that?" Draco asked, relieved because of the change of topic. He tried to sound as interested as possible.

"I don't know... they're just not… I prefer cherries!"  
"Cherries? We've got cherry trees," Draco said, his voice louder this time. "We can go and get some if you want,"  
Draco grinned and walked closer to the Manor. It was quite a walk but that didn't matter – this way they could talk a bit.  
"Are we allowed to eat them?" Ron asked nervously when he followed Draco though the huge garden.  
"Of course we are. What are cherries when we're not allowed to eat them?"  
"I… don't know… perhaps your father wouldn't want us to eat them,"  
" He doesn't know, you know...let's keep it a secret," Draco said, a huge smile in his voice.  
"He's gonna be very angry..."  
"Not if he doesn't find out," Draco usually wasn't too keen on defying his Father's commands, but cherries were never mentioned. He didn't want him to find out so they could be forbidden though.  
They were now walking towards a place Ron had been with Draco before. The place the Malfoy's used to sit with their guests when the weather was as sunny as today. Ron had always liked that place very much because it looked royal and was very impressive. There was a fancy word for it, but he forgot.

…sometimes he envied Draco, and this area was definitively a reason to.

When they had almost reached the divans, Ron said: "I like this place you know..."  
"I know you do, Ronald. You've told me before," Draco said softly with a huge smile on his face. "And you'll like the cherries. We have the best cherry trees the United Kingdom!"  
"The United Kingdom?"  
"Yes,... we live there?"  
"Well...I stick to England, really,"  
Draco sighed. "You have to think outside of your cardboard box, Ronald,"  
Ron nodded slightly, wondering if Draco was being himself or just impersonating his father.

It was silent for a few moments. Then; "is my Mother drunk?" Draco asked out of the blue, pulling some leafs from a nearby bush.

"I don't know," Ron replied, not actually thinking about it until after he answered. "Why would she be drunk?"

Draco shrugged.

"Bill and Charlie get drunk on the weekends. Not on Tuesday mornings, …but I don't know when people like you drink," Ron replied, kicking a poll of grass.

"People like us?" Draco looked at him briefly and then started tearing the leafs he picked to bits.

"Yeah you know, your mum and dad and you. And the king of France."

Draco stopped walking; "The king of France?"

Ron just nodded at Draco's questioning face. "What do my family have to do with the king of France?" the blonde fully turned to face his friend now, making Ron feel slightly stupid for mentioning it.

"Well-… you both have big houses..?" Ron tried, not too sure of himself. Draco laughed; "France doesn't even _have _a king nowadays, you know."

Ron wasn't just going to take Draco's word for that, "-how do you know? Have you ever even _been_ there?"

Draco cocked his face up, ripping more innocent leafs off the nearest bush as he walked on; "As a matter of fact I have. We didn't get to meet the Minister of Magic, but Mother knows his wife personally,"

"Your mother knows the wife of the Minister of Magic of France?" Ron was amazed.

"Yes. They went shopping together, and Father showed me around. We visited the Louvre, the Eiffel Tower, the Champs É... Gate, and many other statues and museums." Draco's nose was in the air as he spoke.

Ron was quiet-…and impressed. He was thinking though as they walked on… Then- "how did they meet?"

"Who?"

"Your mother and the wife of the French Minister of Magic, how did they meet?"

Draco sighed; "At a party of course! It's how I met Vincent, Gregory and Pandora, as well." He took any chance to talk about himself.

"Who are _they_?" Ron was almost offended now; how come Draco and his family knew all these cool people?

"Children of Father's friends," Draco replied smugly. "Pandora is very bitchy," he tore a leaf in half particularly violently –"she'll be my wife when we're adults."

"Because she's bitchy?" Ron was downright amazed now. "That doesn't sound very nice."

Draco rolled his eyes and sighed in a very annoyed way; "She's not bitchy to _me_ of course – she's bitchy to _Vince_ and _Greg_."

Ron picked up a stick and hit it against a tree as he passed it. "…I don't believe you even know people by those names."

"Vincent Crabbe, Gregory Goyle and Pandora Parkinson," Draco gave Ron a condescending look. "Vincent's father taught me how to play poker. So later I got to join in a game between Father, him, and Gregory's father. Pandora's father couldn't make it because he had business in Spain."

"Spain?"

"Yes, a country near France. Europe. Main land. Doesn't your teacher teach you anything?"

That was it. Ron stopped walking, threw the stick aside and shouted; "I _know_ you're better and smarter and you have the best of everything now, okay? If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all!"

Draco was shocked by Ron's outburst, and for a moment it looked like he was about to cry. He recovered though, and a slight pink blush appeared on his cheeks and ears as he replied; "..did your mummy tell you that?"

"...tell me what?"

"'If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all'?" Draco repeated the words in a mocking tone as he crossed his arms.

"It's _true_ though! And at least my dad doesn't look like my mum!"

Draco's face relaxed and something like a smile appeared. "…my Father said your parents could be siblings."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Ron shouted, still offended.

Draco hesitated; "Well-…that they look like each other, obviously." He was still smiling smugly; even though he did not get the joke exactly, he got more of it than Ron did and that was enough.

"Cheer up, I can see the cherry trees now!" He then said, looking ahead again. The trees in the distance did indeed seem to have something red hanging in them.

"I don't _want_ your stupid cherries."

Draco looked from Ron to the cherries and back.

Ron looked- no _glared_- at the pond behind Draco, arms crossed and his pouting face on.

Draco sighed in an exaggerated way; "…so we walked _all_ the way here for _nothing_?"

"No!" Ron shouted in reply, too fed up to have Draco be 'like this' with him for no reason. He didn't do anything wrong, did he?

Well,- …he did now… because he just pushed the other in the water.

When the water splashed up Ron grinned broadly. _That'd teach him_.

When some bubbles came up he then laughed- he pushed Draco so unexpectedly the boy didn't know what way was up!

His laughter became a grimace though when Draco didn't get up in the seconds that followed… or seem to even _try_ to get up for that matter. How deep was this pond?

"..Draco..?" the hope his friend would hear him and come up, laughing, diminished every second that passed. He leaned over a bit, trying to look to the bottom of the pond. He was surprised to actually see Draco there, his hands about one inch under the surface reaching out for him.

It was so unexpected Ron jumped back and looked around, hoping their mothers would happen to be around.

The Malfoy's gardens were empty apart from the peacocks in the distance though… empty and eerily quiet. And from this angle he couldn't even see the other boy was drowning.

Merlin's beard, he actually _was _drowning! Ron fell to his knees and reached in the water, surprised to find Draco had stopped reaching up and was now sort of floating.

He reached further, further-… he couldn't reach the other, and the cold from the water crept up through his sleeve when he leaned in further yet.

The cold and wet engulfed him before he realized he even fell, but once he was in he wasn't coming back up without Draco!

Forcing his eyes to remain open he only _just_ managed to distinguish a pale figure. Good, that was his head. Now- how was he stuck? His feet were reaching the ground now and he dove lower, reaching around for whatever was holding Draco down. There it was- the roots of the tree he hit earlier were holding the other boy down.

With some force Ron hit them away, grabbed Draco, and set off from the bottom.

When he finally managed to get Draco on the side, the first thing he did was slap him. He had seen Bill do that to Charlie once when he fainted.

"Wake up!" he shouted, feeling panic build when he got no reply whatsoever.

And then... what did Bill do next?

He… Ron walked over to Draco's feet, focussing to get the mental image in his mind's eye clearly. Bill got Charlie's feet! He got his feet and put them up, so the blood would go to his brain and he would wake up! Yes, that was it!

He grabbed Draco's feet and held them up.

…

Nothing happened.

"Wake up, wake up,…" Ron muttered, holding Draco's legs up impatiently. "Please wake up,…I'm sorry!" Tears welled up as he apologized as if that could be what the other was waiting for. When that didn't have effect either he pushed the legs away from him, frustrated, about to cry out.

Much to his surprise that movement was exactly what it took to make Draco spit out water.

"Drake!" he ran over to kneel beside his friend, but he was still unconscious. He jumped up again and grabbed Draco's ankles, pushing them forward until he feared he'd break one of the other's ribs with his knees. A little bit more water came out of Draco's mouth, so Ron repeated the action frantically. No more effect. Again – nothing. Again-nothing. Again-again-again-again…-nothing.

He dropped Draco's legs again and kneeled beside him, pressing his friend's chest in an attempt to get more water up. There was a little groan…

Ron proceeded to push Draco's chest more frantically, when that stopped having effect he pressed his belly. The only effect was Draco moving like a rag doll.

"Draco!" Ron begged, still pressing the other's torso rhythmically. He then leaned in, trying to find out if Draco was breathing. His ear stroked over the other's lip, that's how close he was, but no air seemed to come out.

That's not good – people need to breathe! He opened the blonde's mouth with his hands and listened again. No effect.

WHY wasn't he breathing? Tears of frustration were welling up in his eyes now, and he pressed the other's torso again – more violently this time. There was a slight cracking sound under Ron's hands and a wheezing sound coming from Draco's mouth.

"Draco?" What was that cracking sound? WHY WASN'T HE BREATHING?

Maybe.. there wasn't any air in? Yeah, it stopped, he didn't know how to! Without a second thought he took a deep breath and placed his lips around the blonde's, exhaling into his mouth. The only effect was that he felt his own breath come out through the other's nose. He held it closed and tried again, taking a deep breath and exhaling into Draco's mouth. The air stayed in now… he pushed the other's chest again, trying to make it come out again. It did in an airy sigh. Ron repeated the action, two, three times, and he was about to go in for the fourth when he noticed Draco's chest was moving by itself.

Shocked tears of relief came through, and helplessly Ron lay down next to Draco, looking at him every few seconds to see if he was still breathing.

He didn't know how much time passed, but the shadow of the tree they were laying under did move. It was no longer covering Draco's eyes now, and – _were they moving_?

When Draco opened his eyes he felt like he just woke up. The sun was stinging, so he shut them again. "Draco!" Ron's voice came through loud and clear.

Draco sighed – he felt bloated. As if he drank a lot without being thirsty. After a few seconds he realized Ron was pulling at his shoulders, so he sighed again and sat up, immediately getting a coughing fit and reaching for his chest. Watery snot came from his nose and he quickly wiped it off with his sleeve, hoping Ron didn't see it. He was lucky – "Draco! You're all right!"

Confused, the blonde tried to think of what his friend was talking about. He didn't feel all right – his chest hurt!

After a few seconds it dawned in on him though, and angrily he hit Ron's hands off of his shoulders. He got up, face twisted in pain, and he tried to pat the dirt from his clothes before crossing his arms. Within a second he uncrossed them again – "What did you do?" he asked, bent over awkwardly and tears in his eyes.

"I made you breathe again," Ron replied nervously.

Draco breathed irregularly, one hand right below his ribs and his face still twisted in pain. "You hurt me," he whimpered, pouting and shooting Ron an accusing glare.

"But I made you breathe again! _And_ I got you out the water!" Ron reached out for his friend, but Draco turned away and kicked off his shoes. Clumsily he tried to take off his shirt next.

"We can go to our mums," Ron suggested, "she'll heal you, your mum will make you better."

Draco whimpered more, but did manage to get the moist shirt off. He cried out slightly when he finally managed to, and bit his lip in pain to try to get his pants off as well. Tears of pain were rolling down his cheeks and he sniffed.

"What are you doing?"

"My clothes need to dry," Draco bent over to try to lay his shirt down flat in the sun but yelped, fell over, and remained on the ground.

Ron sat down opposing him, trying to see the damage he caused unnoticed.

"You can't go around pushing people into ponds!" The blonde sounded angry now, his hand still on his ribs.

"I know that!" Ron tried, not sounding too convincing.

"Then why did you?"

"I didn't see it!" the ginger was crying with frustration. "I was angry so I pushed you but I didn't know there was a pond behind you, and then I got you out and then you weren't breathing but then I made you b-breathe and. S-something c-c-racked and now you're hu-urt,"

"Cracked?" Draco's eyes grew wide. Ron nodded "I di-didn't mean for it t-to crack, I just w-wanted you to b-b-breathe!"

"You should have _asked_ first," Draco whined, laying on his back now. He tried to take a deep breath but it hitched and he winced in pain again.

"I _did_ ask!" Ron was getting frustrated, "But you didn't reply! Because you were passed out!"

The blonde glared; "I was not."

"You were!" Ron forgot all about his sadness, and was getting angry again.

"No!" Draco winced again – speaking loudly hurt. "You drowned me, that's not 'passed out'."

The ginger wiped the tears from his face with his arm. "I didn't drown you! I _pushed_ you! But I didn't see the water!"

Draco sighed, winced, and yelped - "How am I going to explain this to my parents?"

That startled Ron – his father had told him about Draco's father… and thought he was a very mean man. "You don't have to…"

"I can't just ignore the pain!"

"It's… just a bruise…You can say you fell!"

"In the pond? My parents know I'm not stupid." Draco sounded tired, "And bruises don't crack, you stupid"

"Can I see?"

Draco moved his hand, and Ron crawled closer on hands and knees. "Whoa!"

"What?" Draco tried to look down to see it, but fell back wincing.

"It's nearly black! But purple! It's really cool Drake, can I touch it?"

"No!" Draco cried, looking up at the sky as if it was the cause of his pain.

They were silent for minutes, Draco looking up at the sky and Ron looking down at Draco's bruise.

"Do you think it's broken?" Ron then asked, feeling guilty.

Draco nodded. "I've broken my sternum before…"

"Your what?"

"My sternum."

"Ew!"

Draco gave Ron a confused look, and Ron gave him a disgusted and confused one back.  
"…my sternum," the blonde repeated, eyeing the other suspiciously while waiting for his reply.

The other blushed - "You don't... talk about-"

"-…_that_'s what I broke now, I think," the blonde corrected.

"But I didn't touch you _there_! That's gross!"

"What are you talking about? You obviously did, where else did the bruise come from?"

"Oh! Right! Sternum! Yeah, okay, yeah... I did..-"

"What did you think I was talking about?" Draco asked, bemused.

"Y-er… Nothing, I knew it was that-what you said." He got up and looked around, slightly panicked. "Boy, am I hungry."

Draco chuckled; "Did you really say 'boy, am I hungry'?"

Ron looked down, worried and embarrassed; "…yeah…"

"Check if my clothes are dry," the blonde commanded in response. Ron was eager to obey – at least that wasn't embarrassing.

"They are," Ron said happily.

Draco tried to sit up, winced, and new tears of pain formed. "Help me up," he begged. Ron took his hands and yanked him to his feet. There, that'd show Draco how strong and-

"Ow!" Draco cried, and Ron let go in surprise. He didn't want to hurt-

Draco was on the ground, full on crying but attempting to breathe shallowly. "W-why did you let go?"

Ron looked down on him, feeling like an idiot. "You said ow…"

Draco was still crying, attempted to curl up in foetal position, yelped in pain, lay flat on his back again and continued crying.

"Come on," Ron tried, offering Draco a hand. He didn't take it.

"You can't lay here all day," the ginger tried. Draco continued crying.

Another few minutes later, Draco regained himself and tried to sit up again –but failed. Ron offered him his hand again. "Careful this time," Draco said in the tone he usually used to talk to Dobby.

Ron nodded sadly, and helped his friend up. Carefully.

"My shirt,"

Ron handed it to him.

After a struggle and some winces, Draco managed to get it on.

"My trousers,"

Ron handed them to him.

Again, a struggle and some winces, and Draco had them on.

"Shoes,"

Ron handed them to him.

Draco dropped them.

"...never mind."

Molly and Narcissa were laughing heartedly when Draco and Ron shyly came in through the high French door in the living room. "So then I told Lucius that—… Hello boys, did you have fun?"

Both boys nodded half-heartedly.

Molly's smile faded, and gave them an inquisitive look.

"What did you do?" Narcissa asked, her smile freezing.

"Hide and seek!" they said in sync, giving each other a meaningful look right after.  
Narcissa focussed her eyes in Draco's; "Are the peacocks all right?"

Draco nodded curtly.

"The other animals?"

Another nod.

"Ronald?" Narcissa then asked. Ron jumped slightly. "Are you all right?"

"Y-Yea-_Yes_ madam," Ron gave Draco a confused look, but was distracted by Molly nodding at him.

Narcissa then locked eyes with her own boy again, and stared into them for a few seconds. Draco stared back; "Mother… the animals are all right," he said in a sigh.

She narrowed her eyes at him, and then turned back to Molly.

Molly looked at her son, and could tell there was more going on than the boys were saying.

This didn't seem like the time and place to hear Ron out though.

What time was it, anyway…- "Oh! Dear, Narcissa, we really have to go!"

Narcissa laughed; "N'aw… you can stay for supper! Lucius is always taking the worst company,…in _my _opinion…" -she interrupted herself to laugh- "so you should stay! We can go out, it will be lovely!"

Molly chuckled, clearly not as far gone as her friend; "I'd love to, really, but Arthur would be furious – Not to mention I have more children at home!"

Narcissa let out a wheezing laugh and slumped back into the sofa; "Oh, of course," she gasped, "Your children... of course…" She laughed airily and sighed.

Draco chuckled, winced, and forced a smile.

Narcissa spotted it - "Anything to confess, Draco?" she asked sharply.

A cheeky grin appeared on the boy's face; "Well, you're drunk."

Immediately the woman got up, her nose in the air haughtily; "What is that supposed to mean?" she asked, careful not to slur.

"It means we both have something we don't want Father to know," Draco said carefully, looking at his mother curiously.

Molly's eyes grew wide, whereas Narcissa narrowed hers further- "I tolerate no blackmailing from a little snotty monkey like _YOU_ yours-Drack-," she sighed. "To your room. Now."

"Mother!"

"Now!"

"But I was onl-"

"It's- been a pleasure," Molly started nervously, watching her friend _Silencio _her son and then pointing him the door.

"Your mum Silencio's you?" Ron asked in a whisper, but Molly shook her head at him. Draco seemed upset, waved, and left the room.

"Hm, yes, we should do this again some time," Narcissa said, sounding impatient. "Goodbye Molly… Ronald… it was nice to have you. Dobby!"

"Bye missus Malfoy," Ron muttered, pouting and looking at the floor.

The elf appeared, and escorted them out. Molly looked back, but Narcissa only had eyes for her glass of rum.

When the Weasleys reached the front door, the house was eerily silent.

**A/N: P.S. We will try to update monthly, but we cannot guarantee we'll manage. Please leave a review!**


	2. Chapter 2: Leftovers

**Welcome to chapter two! **

**It's now possible to review this story without logging in! Please use it, we love reading what you think! If you do have an account on fanfiction dot net please do use it – we can only reply the reviews made by logged in users. Also we know we said we would update monthly, but a special holiday like this can't go by without a new chapter! Happy Valentine's Day!**

Next phase, next craze, next nothing new  
got the pretty boy beat him up black and blue  
broke the sissy boy's teeny toy heart in two  
turned him into a video kid like you

I know we're just pretending  
there's no window for mistakes  
I know you see right through me  
there's no promise left to break

shot the pretty boy killed him on commodore  
need a new game, need a new something more  
got a new face got a new way to score  
got a voice like something I've heard before

I know we're just pretending  
there's no window for mistakes  
I know you see right through me  
there's no promise left to break

video...

the message misleading  
we're lying, we're cheating  
we're only repeating  
the motions preceding

I know you're just pretending  
there's no window for mistakes  
I know you see right through me  
there's no promise left to break

video...

'Video kid' by The Birthday Massacre

**"Heal what?"**

"My sternum…"

Draco was looking up at his father who narrowed his eyes in such a way the boy looked down at his shoes instead. His father's shoes that is – his own were still somewhere outside.

Silence.

"I-…fell…" It _hurt_! An hour ago Draco decided to sit down for a moment, but when his father summoned him downstairs he had to get up again… which was harder than expected. And now he was standing, slightly leaning over uncomfortably in a way the man most certainly did not appreciate.

"Look me in the eyes and say that again." That wasn't a voice to mess with.

Draco looked up, pouting.

Was he summoned to the lounge for this? "I f-…was pushed."

His father's eyes drilled into his, and he could feel he was about to cry again. It really hurt! Why couldn't he just heal him?

The man cocked a brow, and Draco sniffed and immediately winced.

"Does it hurt?"

Draco nodded sadly, eager but afraid to break eye contact.

"I don't. appreciate. Being _lied_ to. And I'm not going to heal you until you tell me what happened."

"S-someone-"

"Who?"

"..Ron was h-"

"Who..?"

"…Ronald Weasley…was here…," Draco swallowed – he knew his father wasn't supposed to know. But it _hurt_! And his mother wouldn't heal him… Well, at least she was in trouble too! Getting drunk _and_ silencing him? Father wasn't pleased. Too bad Draco himself wasn't exactly cheering the man up either.

"We were playing outside, and I told him that" –he smiled- "his parents could be siblings, like you said,…" -his father wasn't amused- "…and he got angry and pushed me in the pond near the patio…"

"Did he come here alone?" His father asked.

"Draco! Darling, do you have a moment?" His mother's voice came from a nearby room, and sounded slightly rushed. His father glared at the door, and then closed it by hitting it with his cane.

Draco was startled by the sound of it, hurting his broken bone even more which made tears well up in his eyes.

"Was he by himself…?" His father asked, sounding more impatient now.

"No Father…" the boy fought his tears, but his suppressed sobs were hurting him.

"_Who_ was he _with_, Draco?" The man grabbed his son's arm as he spoke and pulled him closer, causing the boy to cry out in pain.

"His mother!" Draco said, tears rolling down his face as he tried to stand in a way that was less painful.

His father was taken aback, but didn't let go; "What are you crying about?" his tone changed – he was less angry now, and almost sounded worried.

"It h-hurts," Draco sobbed, and wiped away his tears the moment his father let go of his arm.

"What does?" Not used to this gentle tone Draco lifted up his shirt, showing his father the bruise. "I th-think it broke," he sobbed, looking at his father's face without looking into his eyes. The man seemed startled – a most unusual sight. "The Weasley boy did this?"

Draco nodded.

**"...full of Muggles, of course...What platform was it again?"**  
"Nine and Three Quarters, mum...," Ginny replied, looking at her mother in anticipation- "can't I go with them?"  
Ron sighed.  
Ginny had been whining the entire summer, begging their parents to let her go to Hogwarts this year. He opened his mouth and wanted to say she was getting on his nerves but his mother beat him to it.  
"You're too young, Ginny, hush. Percy, you go first,"  
Ron rolled his eyes. This was getting annoying.  
When Percy had disappeared through the apparently brick barrier, she turned to Fred.  
"Fred, now you,"  
"I'm not Fred... I'm George,"  
Ron gave another sigh. He knew his brothers were just kidding, but he couldn't appreciate it right now.

He had felt sick the entire night –and still did. He was nervous for more than two days now.

His mother told him Hogwarts would be like a new home for him, a place he'd love to be, and his brothers told him he'd love it but...  
"Seriously, you claim to be our mother. Can't you see I am George?" Fred replied, a huge grin appearing on his face.  
"Aw, I'm sorry, George dear," Molly replied, a slight smile arraying her face. The woman was far too dupable.  
"Just kidding, I'm Fred," Fred suddenly said, winking at their mother before he disappeared through the barrier, immediately followed by his twin.

"Excuse me...erm...," an unfamiliar voice said.

Ron turned around and looked at a boy of his age. He had dark messy hair, wore glasses, and had a trolley with a snow owl on it.

"Yes, dear? First time to Hogwarts? Same for Ronald," Ron's mum answered, talking to herself rather than to the boy. Ron was used to it – she could turn _any_ conversation into a monologue.

"Yeah," the boy said, "thing is...I don't know...uhm...how to.."  
"How to get to the platform?" she asked with a chuckle in her voice.  
The boy nodded shyly.  
"Oh don't you worry, dear," Molly said "You just have to go through the gate, -your first time, isn't it? You should try to run, and don't stop until you reach the platform.  
"Don't worry, dear," she repeated reassuringly, watching the boy as he hesitantly made way towards the gate, his pace increase until he ran, and disappear when he reached the wall.

Ron took a deep breath and concentrated on his own upcoming passage. When he was just about to walk, his mother put a hand on his shoulder to hold him back.  
"Ron...," she seemed serious- "dear," she added nervously.  
She checked on Ginny, and didn't continue until she was sure her only daughter was focussing on some wallpapers.

"I know it's been difficult...you've been…hard…on us…- I worry about you a lot, ever since...," she paused, seemed to be thinking- "I hope you'll have a lot of fun in Hogwarts, dear. I told your brothers to behave and look after you, and if anything bothers you... you can write us. You know that, don't you?" His mum's eyes were glittering with tears, and Ron noticed her hands were shaking.

"Yeah,…" Ron replied, not feeling too confident. "Mum...it's getting late... we really should..." he felt strangely sad now.  
"Of course!" Molly then said, clearing her throat and swallowing her tears. She straightened her back; "Ginny! It's getting late, come on - let's go! Ron, you go first."

The scarlet locomotive was waiting on a crowded platform. Hundreds of families were looking for a place where they could rest and say goodbye, and many children were running around

Ron was annoyed...again.

He hated crowded places, especially when he was with his family. He loved his family, but for some reason he didn't want to be seen with them. His relationship with them had changed during the last two or three years, and he wasn't sure why.

"Where are Fred and George?" Ginny asked, when she appeared behind Ron, "Mum's gonna freak out,"  
Then Molly appeared, confused when she realized her twins were missing. "Where are Fred and George? I told them to wait for us, didn't I?"  
Ron and Ginny exchanged looks.  
"Oh...come on children, we are late!" Molly then said, shaking her head, "They'll be somewhere in the express I hope,"

Fighting his way through the crowd, Ron suddenly spotted a blonde boy that was standing with his family, standing apart from the crowd. The boy was looking up at his parents nervously.  
For but a second Ron was under the impression he knew that boy, but he had absolutely no idea where he would have met him.

"Fred, George, are you in there?" Ron's mum then yelled in one of the train entrances.

"We're coming!" The twins jumped out of the express, smiling and making funny faces.

"Ron, you've got something on your nose," Molly suddenly said, pulling Ron very close to her.  
"Mum, no," he begged, but it was no use - she already got a handkerchief from her pocket.  
"Mum, please, no," Ron begged now, his voice half-smothered. "Stop it!"  
He got out of his mother's grip and looked at her angrily. She always managed to embarrass him in front of a crowd. That was probably one of the reasons why he didn't like being seen with his family.

"Awwwww! Has ickle Ronnie got somefink on his nosie?" Fred said, trying to poke Ron.  
"Shut up!" Ron replied, still not amused.  
"Where is Percy?" his mum asked, the same moment the boy in question appeared behind her. Ron sighed when he noticed how high his brother's nose was in the air. Before Percy even opened his mouth, Ron could literally hear Percy's pinched voice, announcing he wouldn't have much time to waste because he's the new Prefect.  
"Haven't got much time, mother," Percy then began -Ron sighed again- "I'm at the very front, the Prefects get two compartments of their own,"  
"Goodness me, you're a Prefect, Percy?" Fred said, his eyes growing wide in feigned surprise, "I doubt we would have known if you hadn't mentioned it..."  
"Once..." -George.  
"Twice..." -Fred  
"Just randomly..."  
"The entire summer..."  
"Oh shut up, you two! I doubt I mentioned it enough, considering you still haven't realized the seriousness my function carries. I am now -officially- your superior, and may this be a warning to you….I am _certainly_ not going to make exceptions for you, simply because we happen to be related!"  
"Sure, …why did you get a new coat again?" Fred asked, knowing being unimpressed would bother Percy. And indeed - his ears flushed in annoyance.  
"Because he's a Prefect," Their mother shook her head and forced a smile.

"Anyway dear- you have a nice year, all right? Your father and I are very proud of you, and don't you forget to send an owl as soon as you arrived!"  
Ron nodded absent-mindedly at his mother's words and looked around in the crowd.

There!

Again!

It's the blonde boy!

He was standing near the next train entrance, looking anxious. The boy was talking to his mother who apparently had to fight her tears. The boy's father though seemed indifferent to his family's struggle -he had more interest in the crowd around them.

His eyes narrowed occasionally, and the few times he did look at his son he didn't seem pleased.

Ron wasn't sure if he liked this man. Because sure, the man's appearance was impressive -he wore expensive looking black clothes, and his left hand was resting on a cane - but the way he was looking meant either he felt uncomfortable in crowds as well, or he thought he was better than the rest.

Then he looked at the woman. She was wearing a deep purple shirt and a knee-length dark purple skirt, with a belt that had a big butterfly buckle with gems. She looked immaculate – Ron was impressed, and tried to see her face to see if she was still on the verge of tears. Why were the _mothers_ crying today? They weren't sent to live somewhere else!

When he looked up at her face the woman looked right back at him. Despite the distance Ron knew her eyes were _blue_.

Suddenly it came back to him- that woman was Narcissa Malfoy! Draco's mum! And that boy was Draco! The boy who nearly drowned! Shocked by his discovery he turned back to his family, but his mother spoke before he had a chance to say anything; "The boy who lived is on the express!"

"Draco?" Ron said, sure he would shock his mother by finding out before she did.  
His mum replied without listening to him - "Harry Potter!"  
"Harry who?" he was confused now.  
"Harry Potter, dear! The Boy Who Lived!"

Ron's parents mentioned that boy many times before –a boy who managed to survive an attack by the Dark Lord- but he wasn't sure what to think of it. Right – it was indeed amazing, but what did it have to do with him? Hearing stories about things that didn't concern him tended to bore and annoy him. His father would say it was general knowledge, and that was exactly what it was. General knowledge- stuff everyone had to know for no reason.

"Harry Potter?" Ginny's eyes widened and her jaw dropped, "Mum, can I go inside and see him? Please, I want to see him!"

Ron turned back to look at the Malfoys. Narcissa looked their way – looked at Ron's mum- before looking back at Draco. Draco was looking…boring. His clothes were black. Just black. And he looked sad and nervous. Having his mother pout so close to him probably didn't help. His father then said something, and Draco nodded. He seemed a bit scared, and his mum seemed annoyed by whatever he said. She then said something, making his dad look at the crowd again. She then bend over to kiss Draco on his head, but he avoided her by arching his back. When Draco didn't expect it anymore she quickly kissed him on his cheek. He protested something, and his father almost smiled.

A whistle shrilled.

Molly placed a hand on Ron's shoulder before he could follow his brothers in the train. "Ronald..." she started in a low voice as she leaned in. Not everyone had to hear this. She flashed a look at Ginny, but focussed back on Ron when she noticed her daughter was saying goodbye to Fred and George through a train window.

Molly became strangely sad when she noticed her youngest son gave up resistance the moment he saw her face. "Did you catch that dear? Harry Potter in the express?"  
"Yeah...Mum...I really should-..."  
"Yes, yes...Ron...I'm not trying to-... Though,..." His big innocent eyes made her swallow her tears. Was she doing the right thing? She couldn't go back now though.

"You're a big boy, you know what's important now," How do you tell an 11-year old what you're expecting of him?  
"Mu-hum, the express is about to leave any second…" He started impatiently but ended his sentence carefully. Oh, poor boy. What was she doing? "I really should go now," he added.  
Molly's eyes widened. "The express? Oh! Yes, you should...go...good luck dear." She forced a smile "I love you."  
Ron quickly stepped back, but just when he was about to turn around Molly managed to give him a wet kiss on his left cheek.  
"Mu-hum!"

**She smiled as he rushed in the train. **When the train departed she waved until she couldn't see the twins anymore, and then turned in the hope to catch a glimpse of Narcissa. Surely with the boys gone they could-… There was no sight of the Malfoys.

"Mummy?" Ginny suddenly asked, and Molly felt there were tears on her face. She nearly slapped them away and smiled at her daughter and took her hand. "Nothing to worry about dear," she said as she set pace back to the gate. "Let's go home."

**_The Hogwarts Express is huge!_**

Right. Then why wasn't there a single compartment left that wasn't crowded?

Ron sighed – he had been searching for a place to sit for about twenty minutes now, but everything was full. Standing in the passageway appeared to be his only option.

Surely it wasn't going to take _that_ long to arrive.

The train shook and shuddered as it raced over the tracks, and Ron let his eyes wander over his surroundings. The colours of the walls had faded from orange into a pale yellow-…wait. They used to be white. There were ink stains on it too, and the wooden boards on the lower half of the walls were missing half their paint. And… were those food rests moulding in the corners?  
Suddenly a door opened.  
"Hey you," a strange voice said but Ron remembered it. He turned his head to look into the eyes of… Harry Potter.  
"Hey," Ron replied dryly.  
"You're alone standing in the passageway and waiting for...?"  
"The express to arrive."  
"Don't you want to come inside? I'm alone as well... And I'd be happy to have some company,"  
Harry smiled and looked at Ron expectantly. Ron wasn't yet sure what to think of this boy though. It still was _Harry Potter_, living history and general knowledge. And with a father in the ministry, Ron wouldn't be surprised if he actually knew more about _Harry Potter_ than _Harry Potter_ himself did.  
"Erm…sure..." he answered after a few seconds. Even _Harry Potter_ couldn't be worse than watching the dirty passageway.

Harry smiled and pressed his lips together, before getting back in the compartment. Ron followed him and sat opposite him.

Harry was staring at him, and he could feel his face flush. "What?"

"Oh nothing..." Harry replied, still smiling, "Your family seems quite nice..."  
"Thanks."  
"So...eh-what's your name?" Harry asked, still eyeing Ron and making him feel very uncomfortable. Ron hated being eyed by anyone, especially by general knowledge.  
"Ron Weasley," Ron replied, staring out of the window. When this conversation was supposed to end up in worshipping Harry Potter, he'd refuse to answer any other question.  
"I'm Harry Potter,"  
"I know."

For about ten minutes neither of them said anything. Ron felt very uncomfortable and was hesitant to even look at Harry. His family was obsessed with this boy but he himself wasn't all too interested. Harry seemed to be one of those open-minded people that suffocated others with their incredibly directive kindness.

The silence between them was more unpleasant than the first impression Ron had of Harry though.  
"So...it's true then?" Ron mumbled, still looking out the window.  
"Yeah..." came the reply, followed by a sigh. "I thought you were never going to ask."  
"Huh?"  
Ron turned his head and looked at the other boy. "What do you mean?"  
"You know, the last days were kind of...weird...and I got used to be the centre of attention."  
"I see..." Ron slightly lied, cocking a brow.  
"Oh, no! I'm sorry. That's not what I meant,...I mean -it's not like I _wanted_ to be centre of attention. It's good to know that there are still people who aren't eager to stare at me as if I'm an animal..."

Harry looked down and Ron saw he was blushing.  
"Fame isn't easy" he said, and Harry began to laugh. Ron was glad he succeeded in his attempt to cheer him up.

"No, it isn't, especially not when your parents had to die for it."  
"Hm," what does one say to that?  
Ron couldn't think of anything. What _do_ you tell a boy who lost his parents because of some mad wizard?  
"I wish I had many siblings, like you have. Three brothers and a sister, wow,"  
"Five brothers..." Ron replied in half a sigh.  
"_Five_? ..._and_ a sister?" Ron nodded in reply "That's big family…" Harry said in amazement.  
Ron nodded again- "…yeah..."  
"And they're all visiting Hogwarts?"  
"No...Charlie and Bill- Well...Bill is the oldest, he's in Egypt now, doing some research stuff for Gringott's and _Charlie_, he's in Romania. A dragon tamer, you know. Hm… and...Charlie's been captain of the Quidditch team... Bill was a Head Boy... and _Percy_...he is now a 'Prefect'... And Fred and George- well, they cause a lot of trouble but they're famous. Everybody loves them… And their marks aren't as bad as you'd expect. I'm supposed to stun my parents next...if I succeed, it'll be fine and nobody cares, but if I fail..." Ron let his voice trail off and looked out the window again; "You know...having many siblings can be annoying..."  
Suddenly he stopped. He wasn't supposed to talk so much, but he did! And he didn't even answer the actual question!

"I'm sorry..." he then added, looking at the other boy from under his eyebrows.

"Oh no, it's fine! it's been a long time since I've talked to a normal person" Harry chuckled, obviously amused by Ron's openness.  
"Oh yeah, same here..." Ron replied, immediately shutting his mouth when he realized what he just said.

Too late – Harry noticed; "How come?" The famous boy's green eyes grew wider. Ron was glad the boys glasses were held together by sticky tape – if he was in tip top shape he might have been embarrassed by his own patched clothes.  
"Nothing important… So! Er, you live with...?"  
"My uncle and aunt..., They have a son, Dudley... We're not exactly friends," Harry admitted. "Actually I think they… kind of… hate me."

"So they're Muggles? They know you're a wizard, right? Or did you tell them you left to go on vacation?"  
Harry laughed out "Oh no - they knew before I did!...though they don't seem happy about it...but I don't really care. I'm glad I got the letter."  
"I can imagine," Ron lied again.  
"May I ask what that moving thing in your pocket is?" Harry nodded towards Ron's left pocket.  
"Oh this..." Ron now remembered he put his pet there. He was used to the rat moving around in his pocket, though the animal usually preferred to sleep. That was how it spent his life, really - sleeping, eating, and... well, sleeping.  
"This is Scabbers," He said, as he picked up the rat and showed it to Harry "He was Percy's before he was mine... But he got an owl from my dad, because he's a Prefect now."  
Ron held the rat up for Harry to see.  
"I see," the dark haired boy replied, obviously oblivious to the point Ron tried to make.

Forget about the 'point'- keep talking. If _Harry Potter_ didn't want to pick up on how Ron Weasley felt than that was fine. He didn't need to talk about it, not with _him_- "Yeah... I'm surprised he's awake now...didn't notice he was moving. He could be dead without me noticing."  
"I reckon you don't like him…?"  
"He's useless...though he loves to eat spiders, that is the only thing he's good for," Ron replied, allowing the rat to walk over his legs now.  
"You don't like spiders then?"  
Ron made a face "I _hate_ them."

Suddenly the door of the compartment opened and a girl appeared. She was already wearing her school uniform.  
"Has anybody seen a toad? Neville is missing his,"  
The girl's voice was soft and calm but Ron didn't like the dominant undertone in it.

"No..." he said and looked at her more closely. She had unbelievably bushy hair, and she had horse teeth.  
"Well...in case you spot it somewhere...we're five compartments further on, to the right," she said in a finalizing tone.  
"Alright," Harry said and nodded. When the girl was just about to leave, she turned around again and stared at Harry in disbelief.  
"You are Harry Potter, aren't you?" she said, her eyes nervously searching Harry's forehead for the famous lightning bolt scar.  
"Yeah...that's me," Harry answered, his cheeks flushing.  
"I've read a lot about you, -" the girl started, but Ron interrupted her; "Who are _you_?"

"Me?" The girl pointed a finger to her chest, "My name is Hermione Granger. And… you are...?"  
"Ron Weasley," he answered, feeling slightly embarrassed because he didn't manage to sound as confident as she did. But then again – he wasn't.

"Pleasure," Hermione replied not too convincingly.

Then the compartment door opened again. This time there were three boys in the doorway, but only the blonde most fragile looking one stepped in.

Ron cringed at the sight of _him_- Draco Malfoy, but didn't speak up. Would Draco remember him, too?

"So, it's true then?" Draco asked.  
Hermione turned around and looked into the boy's eyes. "Yes, Neville lost his toad," she replied sarcastically.  
Draco narrowed his eyes and twitched his nose.  
"I wasn't talking to you," he said after a second, sounding colder than was probably justified. "So, Harry Potter is going to Hogwarts?"  
That tone – Draco used to use that tone when talking to Ron. It seemed mean, but… Ron knew he didn't mean it that way. He was being curious and… popular.

Harry stood up and took a step towards the blonde. "Who are you?" he asked, narrowing his eyes as much as Draco did.  
"Draco Malfoy," Ron stated matter-of-factly with a bit of admiration.

Immediately all eyes were on him.

"You got that right,..."  
Draco's grey eyes were now drilling into Ron's blue ones, making the latter very uncomfortable.

"Let me see... Red hair, hand-me-down robes...covered in _vermin_…you must be a Weasley,"

Ron nodded. It was true, wasn't it? Every word of it. He _had_ red hair, which wasn't his most attractive feature... And his clothes _were_ old things he got from his brothers. Even Scabbers the vermin was a hand-me-down.

Nothing new, nothing special.

Just like Ron.

…but Draco was a childhood friend. Surely he'd say something to make it all right again.

Draco sighed mockingly; "The Weasleys... You're much like vermin yourself, aren't you? There are way too many of you, and you all look equally shabby," he shook his head, not looking Ron in the eyes as he spoke- "By the way, these are Crabbe and Goyle."  
Draco nodded towards his mates who looked like they were ready to start a fight.

"Very nice, but Ron, …Heather and I don't need any company," Harry said, sounding as cold as Draco did.

Hermione gave Harry a mean look, but he didn't pay attention to her.  
"Potter," Draco began haughtily, his eyes now locking into Harry's "you will soon realize some wizarding families are much better than others. You don't want to be associated with the wrong sort. _I_ can help you there-…" The blonde indicated Ron with his head without breaking eye contact with Harry - "Because he… _and_ his family…They're a cursed lot," his eyes widened and narrowed again as if he was trying to hypnotize Harry "Give them a finger and they'll steal your arm, I tell you. Thieves of the lowest order. You really shouldn't associate with them." When Harry cocked a brow in response, Draco continued; "For some reason our mothers used to be friends," he turned his face up to show how 'superior' he was- "and we helped them. Financially. …until one day we found out they stole from us. He had Ming dynasty china up his sleeve, and his mother was trying to break into our vault after trying to poison _my_ mother," he paused to shake his head.

That wasn't true. That _couldn't_ be true.

Ron looked at Draco in disbelief, unable to speak. That was nonsense! He would never steal anything, and his mother _certainly _wouldn't!

When Ron remained silent the blonde boy scoffed: "He is not even denying it."  
All eyes darted to Ron.

_"Ron, dear! Rooo-hunny!"_  
_His mum's voice sounded through the storeys of the burrow, loud and sharp. Ron was laying on his bed, going through some Quidditch magazines his dad brought with him from work._  
_Ron sighed. "Yeah?" he shouted back, hoping she wouldn't make him to do the dishes or something. The woman had a wand and could use magic anyway...no reason to slave people into it. She had silly ideas like that – 'knowing how to do the dishes is general knowledge, wand or not'._

_Ron hated general knowledge._

_"Would you please come downstairs? I need to talk to you, dear!" his mum's voice responded and Ron sighed again. Her excessive use of…niceties wasn't a good sign in his experience. Had he done something to upset her? What else could be worth coming downstairs for to talk about?_

_"In a minute!" Ron shouted back as he rolled over and got up from his bed lazily._

_When he arrived in the kitchen his mum was doing the dishes._  
_His dad was sitting at the table, his hands folded and his facial expression strict. This wasn't going to be small talk._

_What did I do?_

_Ron was nervous, but sat down at the kitchen table without making eye contact with either of his parents. It was strange none of his brothers were downstairs…_

_His mum then turned around, her face oddly buried in a scarf. A scarf she wore inside the house._  
_"Your father and I had a talk," she started, avoiding eye contact as well. In fact she didn't even look up from the dishes!_

_"..about….You and Draco, dear." She sounded like she was going to add something, but instead she swallowed awkwardly. His dad took over; "We think it's better you don't meet_

_him again son," he said, looking at Ron sympathetically but strictly._

_"Why not?" came Ron's anxious reply. His dad gave a brief fake smile, and briefly patted his shoulder. "He's…a bad influence on you," he said with a nod, his eyes quickly darting to his wife and back._

_"He's not!"_

_His mum inhaled so strangely Ron thought she was crying for a moment. His dad's eyes darted to her as well, and he reached a hand out to her waist. The moment his fingers touched her she turned and nearly ran out of the kitchen._

_His dad looked at Ron again, locking eyes with him in a gentle way and then cleared his throat. "Do you remember what you said? That he said…your mother and I could be siblings?"_

_Ron was dumbstruck. That was the reason they couldn't meet up any more? "And that… bruise… you mentioned he had?"_

_Ron's lower lip was trembling. "B-but-…"_

_He never should have told his parents. Drake was right, pretending nothing happened was better. "He- d…It was his idea to-…" "Exactly," his dad interrupted him. "So you can't see him any more."_

"I am," Ron suddenly said when Draco was just about to leave.  
"What?"  
Draco turned around and looked at Ron again.  
"I _am_ denying it, Malfoy," Ron snapped, narrowing his eyes in anger at the gawking boy. "We didn't steal from you, your parents were just afraid you'd break something again if you hung out with people who weren't complete idiots!"

Harry chuckled, and looked at Draco who flared his nostrils and was blushing. "Are you saying my parents lied to me?" the blonde asked, looking directly into Ron's eyes in a way that startled him. Ron shook his head.

"You could have made it up yourself, Malfoy," Harry snapped, making Draco's eyes widen in shock. "It's none of your business Potter!" the blonde snapped.

Hermione sighed, and squirmed past Draco and the buff boys in the doorways to continue her search for the toad.

There was an awkward silence in the compartment now.

A second later Hermione walked past them again apparently making way for a lady with a trolley full of sweets. "Anything from the trolley?" the woman asked, making the buff boys come to life as it were. They both tapped Draco's shoulder at the same time. "We'll meet again," the blonde tried to say in an impressive way, but he failed miserably. He then turned to leave the compartment, his blush painfully obvious as he purchased candy for his stupid friends right in front of the compartment window. They were gone soon after.

Ron and Harry then looked at each other and laughed.

It appeared they both found a friend.


	3. Chapter 3: Ink, wax and tears

**We're so glad you made it to the third chapter with us!! And we hope we won't lose you as loyal readers!****This is indeed the THIRD chapter, and there are loads more to come. This is the final 'introductory' chapter. One and two were.. you know, the preview you get before the opening credits start playing. This chapter is actually the opening credits.  
And they're written mainly by Mr. Ronald Bilius Weasley himself. So any mistakes made in the letters can be blamed on him entirely.  
Enjoy! We hope to read a review from you! **

I used to be so sensible on my own  
Now I'm so sensitive it's a joke  
I'm getting by on decibels like a drug  
And greet every brand  
New day with a shrug

I'm barely hanging on

I used to be so comfortable in a suit  
Almost presentable next to you  
I used to be so confident in a crowd  
Now I can't say my own name aloud

I'm barely hanging on

And now I guess you're  
Wondering why  
We never could see eye to eye  
Oh but never mind  
And now I guess it's hard to see  
What has gotten into me  
Oh but never mind

I'm barely hanging on

'Barely hanging on' by a-ha

*******

**2nd September 2001**  
Mum, dad,  
Gryffindor.  
-Ron

**2nd September 2001**  
Charlie,  
first day here was terrible. Mum and Ginny brought us to the platform and you know her, she made a drama and stuff. Wasn't exactly fun but yeah. Mum was being all weird and tried to let me know whats important and what isn't. Or I didn't get it?! No idea.  
By the way the train is dirty  
Oh I made friends with general knowledge you know Harry Potter. He seems to be a pretty cool guy but I'm not sure I would get along with him for a long time. But Im gonna try.  
Well, but actually...I met an old friend of mine. Draco Malfoy. You remember him right? Charlie, is it true that we are...thieves? He said that. Said we were thieves and that we tried to steal from them. That we tried to poison his mother. Charlie, is that actually true? Mum doesn't talk to me about Draco and his family, you know that. Did she say anything about it to you? Please, tell me. I want to know it. I'm sure he was lying...  
Answer me as soon as possible.  
-Ron

**4****nd September 2001**  
Mum, dad,  
sorry about the previous letter. You asked me to tell you what house I was in and I did, I didn't know what else there was to write. Yes Harry is all right.  
-Ron

**15th September 2001**  
Charlie,  
I never thought it could have been just his parents saying stupid things about us and made Draco believe it was true. I never thought his mother would do that...  
I saw his father last week on the train station...he looked creepy. I can imagine he would lie.  
Anyways, I shouldn't bother. I am friends with Harry now.  
Oh well. How are things going in Romania, anyway? How are the dragons? Are you alright or will you have even more scars next Christmas when you're coming over? Mum's gonna kill you then.  
-Ron

**31th August 2002**  
Charlie,  
today was such a terrible day. You won't believe what happened. We went to Diagon Alley, buying some stuff for school you know. And there was...well, Mum, Hermione (we met her there...her parents are Muggles you know and dad was interested) and Ginny insisted to Flourish & Blotts because Gilderoy Lockhart gave a signing session... that man is terribly ugly and a complete idiot. I really dunno why all the girls like him so much. He is a toady and a poser. Anyways, we went in that shop, and the women all wanted to meet the man and yeah...we legally... met Malfoy there. Draco. He was being an asshole, seriously and you know...it's not like Harry kept his mouth shut either. Draco was being all provoking and just a stupid brat but Harry...he just... they had this argument but it wasn't that bad actually but then... Malfoy's father stepped in and joined the party. Can you imagine how tense it was? Lucius Malfoy, he is such a creepy man, I swear. And...Merlin, he is just like Draco. No, Draco is like him, I mean they are related, aren't they and yeah, they are both idiots, sure because it's one family you know and Lucius Malfoy started this awkward chat with Harry, and when Harry mentioned you-know-who it just...went downhill. It's not like he was rude he sorta said that Hermione was a ...mudblood. I swear, that look...could have killed. And Ginny...she…you know her, right? She just can't keep her mouth shut. Big mouth...  
Malfoy wasn't amused. And yeah... you know he doesn't like our family so you can imagine his words. And then...Dad…noticed us talking to the Malfoy's and yeah. So, guess what he did? Right, he couldn't keep his mouth shut either! I am so glad I am not like him or Ginny or Harry. Sometimes it's best to just shut up, don't you think? Probably not, you would have done the same! Anyway, Dad kind of said Malfoy should get lost because it wouldn't be necessary to have an argument because it was just...unnecessary...whatever, you get the idea. It's not like I remember the exact words. A few minutes later Draco's mother came in, too. It was just awkward. We were standing opposite each other and it felt like we were having a war and we were about to attack. I've read that in a magazine recently. Was about some Muggle history. Not that I care but Hermione made me read it because she told me she would test my knowledge about it next time we met. Girls!  
Oh and then, I really don't know what happened next, I just remember that dad had mumbled something like filthy traitors and Lucius Malfoy gave a weird cry before he raised his walking stick to hit dad in the nuts. Dad could avoid it and rolled up his sleeves and made some odd gestures with his fists. Well, most eyes were now focused on us and it was just...horrible.  
Even Gilderoy Lockhart was watching us.  
Mum tried to kind of calm them down then, told them to relax and just ignore each other but when she saw Draco's mum...I swear...she turned silent instantly. And something in her eyes...I dunno...I just had the feeling that there was something going on. Yeah and then dad and Malfoy actually started to fight really badly. You know, that stupid walking stick...I dunno how many times Dad actually got hit by it but yeah…Malfoy definitely had an advantage with that thing. Dad didn't do so well...he is a bad fighter. Though he did manage to give Malfoy a black eye and a bloody lip. Oh and he hit me with a book that was meant for Malfoy but whatever. You know I tried to exchange looks with Draco though...but when I actually wanted to he was gone. Just disappeared with his mother.

**19th November 2002**  
Mum,  
I know you and dad worry a lot but I'm safe. There's no reason to be worried when I'm in Hogwarts. Professor Dumbledore will take care of us, you know.  
-Ron

**27th February 2003**  
Charlie,  
things are pretty weird lately. People are afraid of the 'heir of Slytherin'. It's not like I like being in danger or something but seriously...we can't change it. And now guess who makes big drama out of it. Right. Harry. I know, I know...he is famous and most of the things are about him but he is so into danger!. Like he looks for it you know? What the hell is wrong with him?  
He is even saying other kids are criminals. Draco Malfoy is mean and rude but that doesn't make him someone special. He isn't a criminal, he isn't the Slytherin's heir and he also isn't a bad guy...Well, his father is, but Draco isn't. Not yet. That reminds me of Harry's great idea to have a trip to the Slytherin common room. They want to try it with Polyjuice Potion. POLYJUICE POTION  
Yeah, I know you won't be happy about it but...don't tell mum, alright? I'm not too happy about the idea myself but I have no choice but join. It's so stupid! I have no other choice but turn into a fat moron. That's right, Harry and me are gonna transform into Crabbe and Goyle, Hermione chose Bullstrode. Gods, Charlie, why? I'm sure we won't get any info anyway. Only Harry and Hermione are insane enough for this. Malfoy is an idiot but he isn't Slytherin's heir. And if he was, he wouldn't be so stupid to make a big show out of it. He's too afraid of his father. His father would legally go nuts and hit him with this lame cane. You should have seen that! At Flourish & Blotts...when Malfoy's father came in Draco didn't say anything at all anymore. He is too afraid of that man. So why would he say he was Slytherin's heir? Seriously.  
And I don't feel like visiting Malfoy in the basement anyway. I don't want to see him, I don't want to talk to him. Especially not after I made myself puke slugs. I already told mum that I would need a new wand but she's way too angry to buy me a new one. But I don't want a new one. A hand me down wand would be perfect. I know mum has a second one somewhere hidden but she just won't give it to me.  
Anyways, I don't want to visit the Slyths. I know Malfoy wouldn't know it's me but...  
Charlie, don't you think I could move to Romania?  
-Ron

**5th May 2003**  
Charlie,  
they got Ginny. I have no idea what's happening or how to rescue her. I don't even know where she is. I don't want her to die.  
Shit.  
It's all Harry's fault.  
-Ron

**5th May 2003**  
Mum, dad,  
Ginny will be alright.  
-Ron

**2nd September 2003**  
Charlie,  
Egypt was awesome! Too bad it's over, I don't want to go to school. I don't want to learn. No fun. It was awesome that you and Bill could actually come along, otherwise it would have been only half as good.  
I think mum is still angry that you and Bill got me drunk. I will never forget that night. That Egyptian music has some serious rhythm.  
Anyways, how are you doing? Does Romania seem as dark and rainy as the UK does at the moment? I usually like rain, but spending my time in boring school plus shit weather makes me feel legally depressed.  
-Ron

**2nd September 2003**  
Bill,

Egypt was awesome. I was serious when I said I wanted to stay. And I still hate you for not allowing it. I could have stayed in the pyramid, it would have worked just fine.

You just suck. Hogwarts sucks too. But Egypt is awesome. So was Haneen. Too bad I only remember half of her. You should marry her so you can get a bigger house and then I can stay. It'll be perfect.  
-Ron

**2nd September 2003**  
Mum, dad,  
being back at Hogwarts feels good. I missed my friends. Hermione says hi. And Harry too.  
-Ron

**4th December 2003**  
Mum, dad,  
I don't know where Black is! Why did you ask? It's not like I'm his contact person or something.  
Before you get angry: YES, I got your question and I know you didn't mean it that way. But honestly, as long as we don't know what that guy wants, as long as we don't know where he actually IS! we can't do anything. Don't worry mum.  
-Ron

**3rd April 2004**  
Charlie,  
when I woke up today I was thinking school would be as shitty as always but you know... today was actually exciting. I told you about Hagrid teaching Care of magical Creatures, right? He is still doing awful and I think that today was...well...let's say I am not sure if his career as a teacher has a future. We had... well... he showed us Hyppogriffs. Well, no, I am lying, he legally showed us one Hippogriff, Buckbeak (which is a stupid name, don't you think?), and yeah...he wanted Harry to take a ride on that beast. Yeah, a beast! No, a monster! No...is there any difference between beast and monster? If so, what's it then? A beast could be a beast while a monster is only a creature shown as a beast and called a monster? Does that make any sense? Oh well, I think you'll get the idea and I think you even know the difference...if there is any.  
Anyway, Hagrid wanted Harry to take a ride on Buckbeak and it seemed so okay actually. Harry managed to take a ride and come back in one piece ( because he's a hero) but you know...we had class with the Slytherins and I can't even blame them for being so bitchy about him. Compared to them, he's got serious talent, hasn't he? Though Malfoy shouldn't have been that bitchy today. He made a show and wanted to prove he was able to ride it, too. Buckbeak wasn't too convinced, you know. It hurt terribly I think. It didn't look nice; Malfoy was down to the count within seconds, and his left arm was bleeding.  
I'm still not sure whether I should pity him or not, you know? Sure, he's an asshole like...twenty-four seven but still...that doesn't mean he deserves to be injured that badly. And guess how was legally laughing their ass off? Right, Harry and Seamus.  
"Ron, it's funny!" they had said, but when I wasn't laughing they had gave me a weird look and left.  
I think Harry and Seamus legally get along well...and if Harry thinks Seamus would be a better friend I'm alright with it. It's not like I need Harry...or Hermione. She is busy with homework all the time anyway, so I don't care. You know, I actually thought of kind of letting them down, right? I don't need their friendship. But can you imagine Mum's face when I'd tell her I wasn't befriended with them anymore? Shit I forgot that they both spend every vacation in our house...so...let me get this straight...I have no other option than being mates with them. Charlie, I know this sounds weird but I need your help. I can't go on any longer.

**17th June 2004**  
Charlie,  
the bird is dead now. Some might say it wasn't fair, others say it is. The execution of Buckbeak is probably the best example of how unfair the world can be, though actually ...it's just right.  
It's not like I wanted him to die. But...  
He hurt the boy terribly you know? Sure, Malfoy had been a bitch but you know...teachers always have to be prepared when students break the rules and Hagrid obviously didn't. It's his fault. This might be mean, but it is the truth. And dogs are put on sleep when they attack a carpet floor, it is just fair to... kill an animal because it attacked a student.  
But guess who doesn't agree? Right, my best mates ever, Hermione and Harry. They are under the impression Malfoy is to blame (which he kind of is, yes) and yeah...you know today…we actually wanted to go down to Hagrid, lend him some support (he has been crying for weeks now). Can you imagine how difficult it is to comfort him? Impossible.  
Malfoy was there with his gang...no, not with his gang, just with two people. I really wonder why Goyle wasn't there. An he had binoculars, wanted to tease us and said we came to see the "show". He knew that would provoke Harry. Though it was quite surprising that he stayed calm...it was Hermione who totally lost control. She called him names. True, he called her a mudblood before but seriously...she always claimed to be above it and then she freaks out that much? I tried to calm her down, told her he wasn't worth it but...she punched him straight in the face! I could legally hear how his noise broke. It legally broke! Hermione broke his nose. Legally. I just...can NOT believe it! And Harry just remained silent for a moment before.., laughing. For a moment I actually wanted to help Malfoy...can you imagine, it got him off his feet! Hermione broke his nose!  
But you know...I couldn't help him. I just couldn't you know? I mean...how the heck would it have looked when I did?

**17th November 2004**  
Charlie,  
I feel good. It sounds weird, I know and you are laughing when reading this letter (which I don't appreciate at ALL) but since Harry and me aren't friends anymore, I feel much better. It almost feels like I'm more.. I dunno. I know...you said I shouldn't try to put up a show, but being the one who is offended...being the one to PRETEND to be offended is so much fun. It keeps him on a distance, you know?  
I'm alright with Hermione...she isn't bad but Harry keeps annoying me. Well..Hermione does that, too. I'm actually thinking of how to get rid of her...I mean… how to make her think we aren't legally friends anymore. Do you think mum and dad would be angry? Because I quit being friends with them? I don't know...perhaps I'm mad, but I really think that mum and dad want me to be friends with them so much, they just don't get I barely get along with them. Sure, they were on my side from the very beginning but...it doesn't feel right, Charlie. I'm not happy. I don't belong to them. Hermione is much too clever, Harry is much too into his famous stuff. I'm tired of being The-Friend-Of-The-Boy-Who-Lived. I'm tired of being a part of general knowledge. I am fucking tired of being part of history. Not important but important enough to get little credits...like...just imagine..."Accompanied by his friend, Harry Potter managed to solve the mysterious riddle of the Chamber of Secrets in 2003"  
And that's it. I am not Ron Weasley. And if I even was...I wouldn't matter anyway.  
Mum would call me "complicated" now. Complicated as in...why I am complaining about being friends with Harry Potter? Why do I keep asking for a new inkwell? Because mine is broken? It isn't as important as the fact that Harry Potter has been chosen to be in The Tournament. I'm definitely not whining about my inkwells, Charlie...Ginny got thousands of them...but still...  
It seems I'm writing shit again.  
You were right, by the way. Fred and George got another dun...they don't care though. The only thing they really care about is their wheezes. Actually some of them are actually funny to be honest. I'm glad they don't prank me. That ravenclaw girl wasn't amused when her hair turned to pudding. It looked funny. I've been thinking if Fred and George would agree to let me in on their ideas but then again...Mum would legally kill me.

Speaking of her, you haven't told her about my letters did you? She sent me another two last week and...it seemed like she kind of...knew something. If you told her...I'd kill you. And you know I'd even have the chance to next week, right? You can not imagine how much I'm looking forward to legally seeing you again. By the way mum wanted me to tell Harry about the dragons...haven't done that yet. I'm wondering if I even should. How am I supposed to do so since I'm not friends with him anymore? I'm not legally responsible for him, am I? Last year when he had this big deal with Sirius... I tried to help him so much. And I ended up in the hospital wing. Because I had to face a bloody dog and a werewolf.

I hate dogs, Charlie.

**24th November 2004**  
Charlie,  
I did what mum told me to. She was angry as hell, sent me a howler, and when I told her I didn't want to apologize she threatened me and asked me if I'd prefer being a traitor.  
It's official, I am friends with Harry Potter again. I don't think the world stopped moving, but it feels like I did. I won't go on, I'm stuck. Again  
-Ron

**8th September 2005**  
Mum, dad,  
things are going well. Yes, Harry is alright. He's still alive and he's doing fine in class. Don't worry about him. I'm feeling better, in case you're interested.  
-Ron

**30th January 2006**  
Percy,

How are you? it's been a while since I last heard from you.

-Ron

**30th January 2006**  
Charlie,  
Things are getting worse. I don't know how much you know but...since Umbridge has taken over the school, everyone has gone mad.  
I can't blame them though, Umbridge is a monster. She terrorizes the students, gives us detention, cuts our freedom... She is a bitch. Seriously. But we just...can't do anything. Gods, I can't believe REALLY I can't believe she gets support from the Slytherins. It's so stupid, I mean, they're not gaining anything from this either, it's not like they don't have to follow those shitty rules.  
I really hope things are going better in Romania.  
-Ron

**28th March 2006**  
Charlie,  
DA works pretty well so far; we finally found a way to hype Filch and Umbridge though I'm not sure how long we'll be able to keep things secret. I think some students are spying for Umbridge actually. Things are getting difficult but it feels good to offer some resistance after all.  
What do you think, how long is this going to last? The war I mean. We seem to be doing well but we're just kids. What we're facing is a lot stronger than we could be, even with the Boy Who Lived on our side. I don't believe that we'd be able to build some powerful army. We do actually claim to be an army you know.  
What do you think would happen if Harry died? Really suddenly? I know, I know I have been talking about this so often, but seriously, I haven't found an answer yet and I keep thinking of a life without him. The Dark Lord wouldn't have a legal reason to terrorize us anymore, right? He would still want muggle-borns to be dead though

That sucks so much.  
I wish it wasn't so difficult.  
Since Harry is lovesick he's even weirder. I really don't understand why he gets so distracted by that girl. Sure, he feels bad and responsible for her since he saw Cedric die but...that doesn't mean he has to act stupid. I'm so annoyed.  
I'm not in love with anyone. I wouldn't even know with who?! What about you? Any relationship you're working on at the moment? Oh no, wait. You said you're more of a type for one night stands. To each to their own, I suppose.  
What have you been up to recently? Any news? How are the dragons? I still don't know why you like them so much. Way too dangerous if you ask me. It wouldn't be a job for me. I think I should become... what?  
I don't know what my talents are. Actually I doubt I have any. The only thing I can think of is chess. A professional chess player. I wonder how I'd earn money with that?!  
I am probably going to spend my life on the roads, you know, legally living under a bridge and beg people for money.  
Oh! I could become a magician! Mione once told me that Muggles love magicians! Like they have shows and all that stuff and they show tricks. And some of them are rich and famous. I am pretty sure people would be amazed by my tricks! I could show them how to transform a cup into a candle! Or...I would need a invisible cloak and should disappear on stage! Now that would be awesome  
Ah, well. No. I would fail. I suck at magic. And I think no one would spend money on watching a failing magician. And I would probably faint on stage. Performing on stage isn't for me.  
Talk to you soon.  
-Ron

**2nd October 2006,**  
Bloody Hell! You REALLY did table dancing in a Romanian pub? I just want to remind you of what you once told me. "As soon as you find yourself in the centre of a crowd and you realize they are roaring and encouraging you to stay where you are, you're probably a slut."  
These were your words, bro. I thought you were something like an example for me but you just lost your reputation. Not even the new stuff you got can fix that! How much did it cost anyway? I still can't believe you bought lipstick and mascara for more than a hundred bucks. You legally lost your mind.  
-Ron

**4th November 2006**  
Mum, dad,  
please, stop worrying about me, right? I'm fine, school is alright and I am happy. I'm not a writer, you know that. And I barely have time to.  
No, I won't send you info about Harry and the extra lessons he has with Dumbledore. If you are so interested in it, you should write to Harry.  
Yes, I still take my pills.  
I received the inkwell, thanks.  
Quidditch went well too. We won.  
No, I am not in love with Hermione. Ginny is wrong.  
-Ron

**4th November 2006**  
Mum, dad,  
things are going well. I'm alright but since school is really exhausting, I prefer you'd stop writing.

-Ron

**14th November 2006**  
Mrs Weasley,  
I am doing alright, thank you! Well, the extra lessons I am having with Professor Dumbledore are working quite well and I feel we are so close to success. I can not tell you much about it, Professor Dumbledore made me promise I wouldn't tell people and since I have already told a few members of the order...they might have probably told you already.  
I am not sure what's wrong with Ron. I haven't talked to him for days now, oh well, I have but it'd been only a few words, no longer conversations though. He doesn't seem alright to me, even Hermione noticed that something's wrong with him. Well, this might sound wrong but...Hermione and me found some medicine in his schoolbag and we are not sure if he is supposed to take them or not. Is he? We worry a lot about him as he is our best friend.  
I am looking forward to meeting you in Christmas break! Hermione is excited, too!  
Love,  
Harry

**15th November 2006**  
Charlie,  
how are you doing? Did you actually heal Beslex? I really hope he's alright again otherwise it'd suck. If he's alright, tell me how you managed to. I have been doing some research on dragon diseases because I was bored and it told me it was pretty hard to make them better. Just imagine you rewrote those stupid books! You'd stun people. You should rewrite some other books, too. Do it secretly and make stupid books more interesting. I've noticed that school books get worse every year. My current Transfigs book tries to teach me how to legally turn a snake into a toothbrush. It doesn't make any sense unless I'm lost in the jungle and can't find my toothbrush. Being lost would mean I'd need a razor anyway, a tooth brush wouldn't protect me from wild animals. So, you tell me now why I would need to turn a snake into a toothbrush. If you find a reason I'll buy you new eyeshadow.  
-Ron

**7th April 2007**  
Charlie,  
how are things going in Romania? I guess even the dragons feel there is something wrong. Things have gotten worse during the last weeks, Harry has this weird private lessons with Dumbledore where they try to find out about the Dark Lord and how he could be defeated. They don't seem to have an idea yet. Harry keeps on talking about the Pensieve, keeps on being annoying as hell. I know I shouldn't say this but if he was just dead, LEGALLY dead, we wouldn't have this crap. Don't you think? I don't know what the world would look like if he was dead, perhaps the Dark Lord would have succeeded, but perhaps I'd be dead too?! I wouldn't even notice that things are fucked up. I am not sure though. I could be alive anyway, and I'd have to face even more pain. I have no idea.  
The world has changed, hasn't it? It doesn't move when we want it to and keeps on turning while we're waiting for it to arrive. It wouldn't arrive though, it hates us. You know I have been thinking about things. A few days ago Hermione told me about her home, about some Muggle stuff and how their life is going. Do you think I could just quit school and have a normal Muggle life? I'd miss magic, sure but if that's the prize I have to pay for being free from all this shit I'd give it up immediately. I suck at it anyway. They keep on telling me that and even the teachers know it's true. McGonagall has lost all her faith in me I think, Snape is being a dickhead as always, and Slughorn is just an old man. I don't like him and he doesn't like me. I'm not special, so he keeps legally ignoring me. I'm fine with it. I don't want to be recognized. As long as I get ignored I'm safe. Do you understand? Good, because I didn't get it. Explain?  
By the way I forgot dad's birthday. I feel terrible but I'm afraid to write a letter. He's gonna hate me, I'm pretty sure. But if he hates me now I'm fine with it. He doesn't talk much to me anyway, so I don't care.  
Oh, by the way...today was awesome. I went swimming.  
-Ron


	4. Chapter 4: Second breath

**About the previous chapter: Ron wrote most of the letters. Right? And he likes to use the word 'legal'. Why? Well, he's an oddball. That, and he thinks it's impressive to do stuff legally. He knows it's incorrect though, if he'd bother to think it through. Many people say 'like' all the time, and nobody would have found THAT odd. We know most of you didn't even notice he used it so often... He did though, go back and check! But don't feel bad: ****Nobody read chapter three thoroughly enough.**  
**About this chapter: Because this is fanfiction dot net and not Microsoft Word, the email addresses used in this chapter aren't showing up correctly. Which sucks big time because it makes us look stupid. You know, the 'at'-symbol that is a part of your email address. The email addresses were supposed to be 'at' hogmail dot co dot uk. But fanfiction sucks, so we're leaving that out.  
Also: THIS IS THE FIRST -REAL- CHAPTER! NO MORE INTRODUCTORY SHIZ! Enjoy and tell us what you think, we love to hear from you!**

And you don't seem to understand  
A shame you seemed an honest man  
And all the fears you hold so dear  
Will turn to whisper in your ear  
And you know what they say might hurt you  
And you know that it means so much  
And you don't even feel a thing

I am falling ...  
I am fading...  
I have lost it all...

And you don't seem the lying kind  
A shame that I can read your mind  
And all the things that I read there  
Candle lit smile that we both share  
And you know I don't mean to hurt you  
But you know that it means so much  
And you don't even feel a thing

I am falling...  
I am fading...  
I am drowning, help me to breathe...  
I am hurting...  
I have lost it all ...  
I am losing, help me to breathe...

'Duvet' by BoA

**The weather was really nice today. Definitely nice enough to sit outside on the grass surrounding the Black Lake**.

The Hufflepuffs sat together in a big group, whereas there were only a few Ravenclaws - most of them with books in their hands. Ron, Harry and Hermione were also sitting on the field, glad to find a spot in the sunlight. Harry immediately opened his old Potions book and started reading. "At least he's studying," Hermione sighed to Ron, as she opened her Defence Against the Dark Arts book. She gave Ron a look that probably meant he should study too, and then started reading.

The weather was too nice to focus on books, and knowing his friends there would be enough moments to come in which he could use homework as an excuse to not have to sit with them. So Ron couldn't be bothered. Not now.

He sighed too, and shifted to sit more comfortably. It had been a while since he felt this happy – the pills he took usually numbed him down too much. Quietly he blamed Harry and Hermione for putting too much stress on him, but he couldn't really justify that. It's not like they meant to. So he took the pills and took things as they came.

And today was a good day.

He looked around, leaning an elbow on a knee and leaning his other hand in the grass, _feeling_ it. It was nice to be outside. The Huffelpuffs in the distance laughed.

Ron turned to see who was casting a shadow over his hand, and was surprised to find Crabbe and Goyle stand behind the tree next to him. They were looking at Malfoy, who was sitting on the grass further ahead with that Parkinson bitch next to him

Malfoy didn't seem to be aware of his 'friends' standing behind him so suspiciously though - he appeared to be reading. Ron looked back at Crabbe and Goyle, and grinned when he noticed the buff boys now left their hiding place and were closing in on the blonde.

The blonde who didn't notice there were people so close to him until Crabbe grabbed his arms, and Goyle grabbed his ankles. Malfoy let out some protest, but the other boys were much stronger and ignored it. Pansy shouted "Let him go!" with so much laughter in her voice it made Harry and Hermione look up.

Ron watched, amazed. He didn't expect Crabbe and Goyle to turn on their 'master' like this, let alone this extremely. They seemed to be having a blast.

But the closer they carried Malfoy to the water, the more viciously he struggled. His protests became louder too, and he sounded downright terrified. Nearly everybody was watching now, and many people got up to have a closer look.

Malfoy managed to kick Goyle, but yet he didn't let go. The crowd started to chant 'in! in! in!' now, and Harry got up to join.

Hermione shook her head and pretended to keep reading, but peeked at the crowd over the edge of her book.

Ron was starting to break a sweat. Sure, Malfoy hated to be embarrassed in general… but he would have struggled less- or at least _differently_- if he could actually swim.

He got up, hesitantly, and took a step forward. The crowd was blocking what he wanted to see from his sight now, but when he heard Pansy shriek and then a big splash he dashed forwards.

People were laughing all around him, and the water was wildly bubbling. The pale spot that was Malfoy was quickly disappearing from sight through the water, and Ron looked around to try to find out if anybody else noticed.

None of that – everybody was laughing.

Sure, Malfoy had been a downright asshole in the past years, but that didn't mean he deserved to _drown_! Crabbe's laughter became less sincere now, and he, too, was looking at the water.

By that time Ron already kicked off his shoes and was taking off his vest.

"He can't swim," he replied to Harry's questioning look

He was glad he heard _nothing_ instead of laughter, before the water engulfed him.

The water was surprisingly much colder than the air above, and Ron's clothes were a lot heavier than he had expected them to be. And _he_ could actually _swim_! Squinting he tried to figure out where the blonde was, but he saw nothing. It looked like it was called 'the Black Lake' for a reason – when he stretched out his hand he could barely see it, even though the water was clear. He swam a bit deeper, uncertain of what way to go. The one hand he stretched out in front of him now touched something that could be hair. He reached into it –_grabbed_ it, and tried to pull it closer. It was Malfoy, no doubt. The blonde was moving around wildly and immediately reached out for Ron with both hands, clinging to him and making it even harder to swim.

He pulled himself closer to the other and managed to get a hand under his arm, and then tried to swim up again. How the Hell do you tell someone to _kick their feet_ when you can't speak?

Apparently – you don't. So Ron tried to swim up with all his might, dragging Malfoy by an arm.

It appeared the surface was moving away from them though, and Ron looked down to give Malfoy a glare. Perhaps he ought to knock him out so he'd be easier to drag along?

The pressure on his ears increased too, and he let some air escape from his nose to decrease pressure on his chest.

Something moved by his cheek and he reached for it, surprised to find it was a wand. He then pulled himself down by Malfoy's clothes. The blonde had his hands pressed against his ears and – not anymore. He was now being dragged down without moving on his own accord.  
Ron now held on to Malfoy's belt and managed to shoot sparks down from his wand, trying to see what was going on. The light was enough to scare whatever was holding the other away and it let go. Ron let some more air escape from his nose to decrease pressure more. He really needed to breathe now.

Again he took Malfoy's arm and started swimming up, thankfully being more successful now. His ears still hurt but that didn't matter- he was up!

Air!

He took a deep breath before managing to get Malfoy's head above the surface, and reached for the hands reaching out for him.

He was pulled on the grass and managed to drag the completely limp Malfoy along. He turned him on his back, and then realized the wand he used under water wasn't his own – it was Malfoy's.

He put it next to the other boy and then realized everyone was just standing around them. "Well make him breathe!" he said, looking at Pansy in particular. Even Harry didn't seem to know what to do.

"Accio the water from him," Goyle said to Crabbe.

"You're next to the LAKE, idiot!" Pansy screeched "you'd drown him again! Drake! Wake up!"

Ron sighed, and crawled over to Draco.

He just saved the boy, he might as well…-_save_ him.

So he gave him mouth to mouth -knowing how to this time-, completely ignoring everyone around them. He still hadn't forgiven the blonde for accusing him and his family of theft, but saving his life was all right. Perhaps he could demand an apology later?

Either way, he wasn't paying attention to what he had to do to get the blonde to breathe again, to the bystanders' voices or to how tired he was. This was something that had to be done.

Stupid pills didn't allow him to get upset.

"He'll wake up," Ron replied absent-mindedly to Pansy's frantic screams for help. He was sitting on the grass, casting drying charms on his clothes. Harry sat down next to him, and Hermione stood at his other side. Most other students left when they heard Malfoy was only sleeping.

"You saved his life," Harry said sounding surprised. Ron didn't respond. Hermione kneeled down beside him. "If you did... he's got a life debt now," she said softly.

Ron sighed and put his shoes back on.

Just then Malfoy coughed beside them. "Drake!" Pansy exclaimed, nearly throwing her wand from her hand because she had been casting drying charms on his clothes.

Draco sat up, and leaned in the direction of the trio - "Life debt?" he asked in a soft voice, ignoring Pansy completely.

The weasel looked back at him, and Draco felt a strange sense of nostalgia. "Don't worry about it," the ginger replied.

That was easier said than done.

How could he be so calm about it?

"_You_ got me from the lake?" Draco asked, still looking at the ginger who nodded absent-mindedly. "You should be thankful Malfoy, you would have drowned without him!" Potter replied, making deeply rooted hatred boil inside of him.

"Shut it Potter- I know it's hard for you to deal with but this has nothing to do with you," he turned back to the Weasel, awaiting an answer.

The only response he got was a -confused?- look though, and then Pansy was clinging to him again; "Draco! We have to get you to the Hospital Wing!"

He shook his arm impatiently to try to get her off, but it was no use. And the weasel wasn't replying anyway.

"He diddled you Drake! We have to get you to Pomfrey!" The absurdness of her words made him turn around- "He wh-?" "He kissed you in front of everyone!" Pansy cried, making the Gryffindor trio and everyone else within hearing range laugh out.

Immediately Draco jumped up, feeling strangely faint but ignoring it. His hair was still wet because he startled Pansy before she was done. That was the least of his concerns now though - his face was burning in shame. The Weasel _kissed_ him? What the _Hell_-? And he had a _life debt_!

**Draco's Father never approved of anything Muggle related inside of Hogwarts.** Dumbledore, on the contrary, thought it was a waste to let this chance to use this amazing development slip. Most of the explanation and justification he gave during his first speech had gone by Draco – the task the Dark Lord gave him had taken up all of his attention.

And it still was – even more so than before.

So now he needed that bloody Muggle thing – the computer? How something that apparently 'computed' could be used for communication was beyond him – maybe he'd find out later.

When he found a Slytherin that took Muggle studies –why any Slytherin would take Muggle studies was also beyond him- explained the computer to him, he actually actively took notes. He never thought he'd do that for anything concerning the topic… Let alone concerning the topic directly relating to his task for the Dark Lord!…but here he was:

_Computers  
No wand__ – 'Muggle magic'  
On and off button  
Keyboard for communication – non alphabetical  
Enter – 'activate'__, sends message on MDM  
Big plain bar – makes spaces between letters  
Backspace – removes last letter before blinking vertical line  
Delete – removes first letter after blinking vertical line  
Caps lock - capitalizes all letters unless shift is pressed (hit again to end effect)  
Shift + letter – capitalizes letter  
Shift + symbol – changes symbol  
Alt + enter changes symbols_

_Mouse for selecting – computer's wand  
Left button selects and activates  
Right button shows options_

Internet – library like a Pensieve

MDM – Muggle Device Messenger_  
Code defines identity, address needed for communication  
Students - Slytherin – __S000000  
Gryffindor - __G000000__  
Ravenclaw - __R000000__  
Huffelpuff - __H000000__  
My address – __S1793837__  
Professors - Muggle studies professor (Charity Burbage) – __P000001_

_Establish identity  
(use mouse) Extra - options – screen name ('type' using keyboard)  
(use mouse) Extra – options – change icon (use mouse to select image)  
Images – Scan photos  
Select images from the internet_

…and that was just what he wrote above the first fold in the parchment.

Of course he could just owl the Weasel… but the chance of a reply was much slimmer.

So after supper that evening he sat down behind one of the four computers in the Slytherin Common Room, and struggled to think of a password.

He couldn't afford making it too obvious – he didn't want anyone getting into his account. Because if they could, they might find out what he was trying to do and who he was trying to talk to and how hard it was for him to even get to use this thing and what the consequences were and that he almost drowned in the lake today and-…. _Stop._

_Just… Shut up.  
Panicking doesn't help_

-Welcome to Muggle Device Messenger-  
- Address: S1793837  
- Password: **********

WHY DID IT SHOW UP AS STARS? He typed TAGUEUELLE, didn't he ?

He hit the Caps Lock and Shift about a million times now!

"When you type your password it shows up as stars so people who walk by can't see it," the Slytherin who took Muggle Studies said with a chuckle, making Draco's blood boil.  
Without replying to the boy he clicked 'log in' with the mouse, glaring at the red, yellow and blue puppet dancing around each other on the screen. Trust Dumbledore to keep Slytherin out of consideration.  
There – he was in. The list of contacts was enormous though, and the random screen names really weren't helping.  
Draco went through his notes, and figured out how to show the people by the display images they chose for themselves.  
For himself he chose the Slytherin house logo that he came across coincidentally.  
As his screen name he chose a line from the French national hymn – _Qu'un sang impur abreuve nos sillons!_  
People might figure he was some geek at first sight and let him be. Unless of course they were geeks too. But -… No. He needed something simpler to get Ron to talk to him.

And he had a perfect idea…

**Hero of the day**** says (19:04):**_  
what the fuck?_**  
Weasley sucks says (19:04):**_  
Hello there._**  
Hero of the day says (19:05****):**_  
who is this?_**  
Weasley sucks says (19:****05):**_  
What makes you think you're a hero?_**  
Hero of the day says (19:05****):**_  
i saved malfoy from the black lake. who the fuck are you?_**  
Weasley sucks says (19:****06):**_  
Are you alone?_**  
Hero of the day says (19:06****):**_  
no. who are you?_**  
Hero of the day says (19:06****):**_  
and why are you ona computer?_**  
Weasley sucks says (19:****07):**_  
I need to talk to you, preferably without anyone around to notice._**  
Hero of the day says (19:07****):**_  
why would you a slytherin talk to me?_**  
Hero of the day says (19:07****):**_  
and why cant you talk to me face2face/?_**  
S1793837**** says (19:08):**_  
Because there is nowhere we could meet up without people wondering._**  
Hero of the day says (19:08****):**_  
are you going to tell me who you are?1_**  
Hero of the day says (19:08):**_  
!_**  
S1793837**** says (19:08):**_  
When I'm sure there is nobody else there, yes._

Draco certainly didn't expect this to be so frustrating. At least he was fairly sure this was the right guy though – who the hell would want to impersonate him?

**Hero of the day says (19:09****):**_  
im not alone but nobodyis reading along WHO ARE YOU?_

Capitalized letters are intimidating. Good to know.****

S1793837** says (19:10):**_  
Malfoy._**  
Hero of the day says (19:10****):**_  
liar_**  
Hero of the day says (19:10****):**_  
malfoy wouldn't be ona comptuer_**  
S1793837**** says (19:11):**_  
I told you; __I need to talk to you, and it's not possible for us to meet up without raising suspicion._**  
Hero of the day says (19:11****):**_  
Right._

Now what? Draco went through his notes, wondering how to ensure the other was alone. Before he found a way he got a new message though:

**Hero of the day says (19:13****):**_  
w__hy did you say we were thieves?_**  
S1793837**** says (19:13):**_  
What are you talking about?_**  
Hero of the day says (19:13****):**_  
on the train when we first went to hogwarts you told harry thatme and my mum were thieves and you know its not true so why did you do that?_**  
S1793837**** says (19:13):**_  
Because it is true._**  
Hero of the day says (19:13****):**_  
its not. its ok to stop lying becaus enobody is reading along here you can say it._**  
Hero of the day says (19:13****):**_  
they dont even knowwe used to be freins_**  
Hero of the day says (19:13****):**_  
friends**_**  
S1793837**** says (19:14):**_  
It is true. You weren't allowed to come over anymore because you and your mother tried to steal from us._**  
Hero of the day says (19:14****):**_  
thats not true.i told you on the train first day. your parents must have lied to you because mine said that we couldnt meet up naymore becaus eyou were a bad influence on me. i think theyre afraid of us cos were not sa narrowminded as you_**  
Hero of the day says (19:14****):**_  
and your paernts arent v hobest anyywa  
_**Hero of the day says (19:14):**_  
very honest*_

Where the hell did the Weasel get the _bloody nerve_ to…  
To…  
…accuse his parents of dishonesty…?  
Draco certainly didn't expect to get this wound up over a written conversation.

**S1793837**** says (19:17):**_  
Sometimes you don't have a choice. All right? You can't expect someone who is forced to chose between immediate death and living a double life to chose death, no matter how terrible the double life is. He was honest towards us for as far as he could be, but he had to keep quiet to others or he would have been arrested and mother and I would have been in danger._

'Not like we're safe now…' Draco added in mind, waiting for Ron's reply.

After checking if there was anyone reading along over his shoulders he sighed. People in general didn't seem interested in the computers. Or in Draco himself, for that matter. He had been distant towards everyone since the beginning of the year, and thankfully it kept people away. Pansy was the only one to talk to him nowadays, and she wasn't in the Common Room.

**Hero of the day says (19:17****):**_  
that shows how much your family sucks_**  
S1793837**** says (19:17):**_  
Did you even read what I said?_**  
Hero of the day says (19:17****):**_  
yes_**  
S1793837**** says (19:17):**_  
Stop being such a smart ass, this isn't a popularity contest. Father lying about being a Death Eater has nothing to do with you and your family, you're not worth lying about._**  
Hero of the day says (19:18****):**_  
youre a prick i dont need to talk to you_**  
S1793837**** says (19:17):**_  
You do. There are lives at stake._**  
Hero of the day says (19:18****):**_  
lol did he get death penalty/_**  
Hero of the day says (19:18****):**_  
what did he get and what for actulaly?_**  
S1793837**** says (19:20):**_  
Read the paper._**  
Hero of the day says (19:20****):**_  
i wanna hear it from you_**  
S1793837**** says (19:20):**_  
Intimidation; a month (seven times)_**  
S1793837**** says (19:20):**_  
thirteen cases of fraud, three months for each_**  
S1793837**** says (19:20):**_  
Using forbidden curses__, because he was a Death Eater a year per use, 37 times_**  
S1793837**** says (19:21):**_  
manslaughter two years, and on top of that the judges didn't think he showed enough remorse for accepting the Dark Mark._**  
S1793837**** says (19:21):**_  
That's 15242 days._**  
Hero of the day says (19:21****):**_  
what?_**  
S1793837**** says (19:21):**_  
42 years and 10 months__. He's in for 27 days, so 15215 to go._**  
Hero of the day says (19:21****):**_  
thats a lot of xmasses_**  
S1793837**** says (19:21):**_  
We don't celebrate Christmas._**  
Hero of the day says (19:21****):**_  
figures_

Great. Draco was on the verge of tears and they hadn't even gotten to the point yet.

**Hero of the day says (19:22****):**_  
Harry thinks youre a death eater too_

What the—Draco's heart just skipped a beat. Potter was onto him? How could he possibly fulfil his task now? How could he even know?****

Hero of the day says (19:23**):**_  
are you?_

He checked behind him again – locking eyes with Pansy who just came in. "Hey!" she said, almost mockingly enthusiastic "since when do you use those?" she was quickly approaching him, so he got off the chair and blocked most of the monitor from her sight. "Since now," he said, moving along with her as she tried to see what was on the screen.

Crap – he couldn't use this now!

"What's the matter?" apparently she focussed her attention to his face. He cocked a brow in response. "Your eyes are all shiny, are you all right?"

He cocked his face up; "Never better."

She clacked her tongue -"You're such a liar!" again, that near mocking tone. "It's okay, but you know-" She reached out and Draco quickly tried to ensure she wouldn't click or type anything, but she just wrapped her arms around his waist "you can always talk to me if you want, I can listen too you know," she leaned her head against his shoulder for a moment, and then let go. Draco was shocked, but she seemed slightly embarrassed; "I wanted to do that for a while now –…" she shifted her weight on her feet. "But you know… I'm your friend so…"

Draco was dumbstruck.

"So… yeah," she said awkwardly, then turned and left.

When Draco sat down again he could hear Pansy talk in the distance, before hearing a younger girl's voice fill up with tears in reply.

Typical.

He really didn't want to think about it.

**Hero of the day says (19:24****):**_  
helloooo?_**  
S1793837**** says (19:25):**_  
Hello. People here. Are you still alone?_

Draco certainly hoped he wasn't being too suspicious…

**Hero of the day says (19:24):**_  
yes. so are you?_**  
S1793837**** says (19:25):**_  
I have a life debt running with you._**  
Hero of the day says (19:25****):**_  
aer you sure?_**  
S1793837**** says (19:25):**_  
Yes. And you're in trouble._**  
Hero of the day says (19:25****):**_  
does that mean you're a death eater?_

Yes, it does.

Shit.

He wasn't supposed to let anyone know? _ESPECIALLY_ not Potter's best friend!

But he couldn't risk the other boy _dying_! It'd mean his own death, and that would mean he might as well have refused the Mark. …would have saved him a lot of trouble.

**S1793837**** says (19:26):**_  
It does. We need to talk face to face_**  
Hero of the day says (19:26****):**_  
__S1793837__ says (19:11):  
I told you; I need to talk to you, and it's not possible for us to meet up without raising suspicion.  
how do you wanna talk/_**  
S1793837**** says (19:26):**_  
There has to be a way for us to talk face to face without raising suspicion._**  
Hero of the day says (19:26****):**_  
random_

Draco slumped in his seat and tried to think. Indeed, there had to be a way for them to talk without people noticing something was up… Perhaps he could claim he wanted to thank the other for saving his life? No, even teachers would find that suspicious.

He looked around in the common room, hoping for inspiration. There were two fourth year boys at the table, apparently studying.

**S1793837**** says (19:28):**_  
What is?_**  
Hero of the day says (19:28****):**_  
that i save your life and now we gotta talk because youre a deatheater_

Draco sighed, and sat up straight. He couldn't really think now, and-  
"Oy faggos, move aside!"  
Draco looked over his shoulder to see the fourth year boys move a few seats awkwardly to make room for Vincent and Gregory.

**S1793837**** says (19:29):**_  
I have an idea how we can talk without raising suspicion._**  
Hero of the day says (19:29****):**_  
just say it_**  
S1793837**** says (19:30):**_  
We could pretend to be a couple. It would be so embarrassing nobody would think it was a cover._**  
Hero of the day says (19:30****):**_  
thats mental_**  
Hero of the day says (19:30****):**_  
cant you think of something ebtter?_**  
S1793837**** says (19:30):**_  
No. Can you?_**  
Hero of the day says (19:30****):**_  
im not gay_**  
S1793837**** says (19:30):**_  
So? __We would be PRETENDING. And we need to talk as soon as possible so just agree with it._**  
Hero of the day says (19:30****):**_  
lol so it matters if i agree or not?_**  
S1793837**** says (19:30):**_  
What does lol mean?_**  
Hero of the day says (19:31****):**_  
laugh out loud_**  
S1793837**** says (19:31):**_  
It's not funny._**  
Hero of the day says (19:31****):**_  
so where do you wanna meet?_

**A/N: That's it for the fourth chapter! The ****code at the end got jumbled up somehow: It's showing up as bold entirely while only their screennames should be bold. But it's fixed now because of the boldness of the author's notes! Lesson of the day? Fanfiction dot net fails about as much as MSN does. **_  
_


	5. Chapter 5: Not a plan

**A/N: Welcome to the new update of Stains! As you might have noticed, Fanfiction dot net has changed its shit again. Sort of. The asterisks we used to make separate sections inside each chapter no longer show up. Because of this, we are now putting the first line of every section in bold font. Don't skip them: they're not titles, just the first lines!  
In unrelated news: Synderska and I are actually IN THE SAME FUCKING ROOM RIGHT NOW which is weird because usually we communicate through monitors only. Like we're doing to you .  
We really hope you enjoy the chapter – the next chapter contains many revelations, and this chapter is pretty much a build up to it. **

**When she was a young girl**  
She used to play with me  
I was her best friend  
We were inseparably  
We loved to ride our bikes  
Playin' hide and seek  
Sneaking all the night  
Dancing in the street  
I look back at the time  
Now I realise  
She loved to play with fire  
I should have seen it in her eyes  
I should have seen it in her eyes  
Deep inside, you cry cry cry  
Don't let your hopes,die die die  
Deep inside, you cry cry cry  
Don't let your hopes,die die die  
Na, na, na, na, na, na, na  
Na, na, na, na, na, na, na  
She fell in love for the first time  
He was older than her  
Then he made her do things  
First she wouldn't tell  
She left everything behind  
Couldn't find a place  
Running through the night  
Loosing all her faith  
She throws away the pain  
Turning off her lies  
But still she makes it seem like everything's alright  
Like everything's alright  
Deep inside, you cry cry cry  
Don't let your hopes,die die die  
Deep inside, you cry cry cry  
Don't let your hopes, die die die...

'Cry cry' by Oceana

**The classroom was abandoned, apart from the boys who were both looking at the floor.** The blonde was leaning against a table, and shifted his weight uncomfortably. The silence between them wasn't awkward, but it was definitely loaded.  
"...can I see it?" the ginger asked after a while, looking up at the other. He then nodded in the direction of his forearm.  
As a reply the blonde moved up his sleeve. An ugly skull stared angrily at Ron, as the snake that raped its mouth writhed under the skin.  
"Did it hurt?"  
Draco moved his sleeve down in response, and leaned his hands on the table again.  
"Why did you take it?" for some reason Ron felt it was his duty to keep the conversation going. At least for now.  
"If I didn't they would have killed me," Draco replied flatly without making eye contact. In a near whisper he added - "and if I don't fulfil my mission they will kill my Mother."  
He took a deep breath then to prevent any silence that could provoke Ron into asking more questions. "If you die, I die. And if I wanted to die I would have declined the Mark," he interrupted himself to swallow, and regretted he wasn't able to maintain his apparent equanimity. "If anything goes wrong, my Father has nobody to come home to when he is released… I know you think my family sucks but you can imagine a house like ours without a family in it sucks even more."  
Ron nodded. Draco's voice was soft and his tone wasn't particularly harsh, but it was painful to hear anyway.  
"...they really lied to you though… we don't steal," he said after a few moments of silence.  
Draco glared at him in response.  
"Why would they do that?" he then snapped "-it's not like it would have mattered to me, they might as well have told me you were a 'bad influence'. Now let's drop it, and get to the point." He nodded to himself, and then took a deep breath; "I have a mission."  
Ron didn't say anything.  
"I… have to kidnap Potter. Apparating is impossible from Hogwarts grounds, and I can't exactly owl him over…"  
Draco took a break. Externally that was – his mind was racing. This was harder to talk about than he thought, even though he had already said the worst things.  
"It… can get messy." That summed it up fairly well.

"What does that mean?!" the other boy asked frantically, apparently offended.

Draco sighed; "…if you get in my way, I will have to kill you. They… told me to. Thing is – if you die, I die."  
Ron was now looking directly at him, and seemed… well; worried was an understatement.  
"So-… I need you to-…be with me on this." Draco pressed his lips together and nodded.  
He wasn't exactly as cool as he wanted to be, but at least he made his point.

"You mean… betray Harry?" Ron asked, looking as if he just heard a bad joke.  
Draco half-shrugged and looked at Ron's shoulder – "Well-… just... lay low for a bit…"  
"...you just told me you have to kidnap Harry, and you want me to lay low?" Ron asked in disbelief.  
Draco then locked eyes with him – he looked sad, no doubt about that: "Please… don't make me kill you."

"...will you kill Harry?"  
Draco just looked at the other in response initially. Then: "…it's my task to kidnap him. I don't know what happens after I hand him over… I suggest you don't give it too much thought either."

Ron sighed and shrugged uncomfortably, as Draco cleared his throat and sat on the table he was leaning against.  
"…have you killed someone before?" Ron then asked.  
It was quiet for a while, and even Ron could feel the 'yes' hang in the air.

Then - "…that's not important right now."

More silence. It was getting awkward.

"So…" -Ron paused to clear his throat- "Why are we pretending to be gay again..?" He almost smiled a bit – it was kind of funny, wasn't it?  
Draco looked at his knees and his mouth moved as if he was chewing something. "Because… this way, people won't wonder why we're talking."

Silence.

"…what if nobody asks?"  
Draco cocked a brow.  
"I mean we just talked… If nobody asks we won't have t-…"  
"This is the first time," Draco replied sternly, "There'll be more."  
"What for?"  
"We need to coordinate this perfectly, all right? If you get in my way I will have to kill you. So you'll have to know what my way is."

Ron seemed dumbstruck: "You're…ratting on the Dark Side…"  
"I'm well aware," came the annoyed reply.  
"But-... that's suicide!"  
"No – killing you is suicide. Ratting on them is… stupid. But also my best bet."

Another uncomfortable shrug from the ginger. He decided to just ask it though, if they were going to meet up to talk more often, he might as well talk!  
"…why do you trust me?" he asked, as the other was checking his nails.  
"I don't have much of a choice, do I?" The blonde looked up after he spoke, with something like a smile on his face. Its insincerity was obvious, making it seem sarcastic even though it had the best intentions.  
It was thoroughly hopeless but Ron didn't realize that. It didn't matter anyway.  
"Well-…" He then started hesitantly. He wasn't really sure what he wanted to say, though he wanted it to be comforting. "You can trust me you know…"  
Draco cocked a brow.  
"I will help you… I don't want you to die either."  
"That's very comforting, thanks." Draco replied. Ron wasn't sure if it was sarcastic or not, so he decided to assume the worst.  
Or… not. This really wasn't something to get wound up over… Draco was under a lot of stress and probably didn't mean it like that. Despite that it felt appropriate to be fed up with him…, but Ron couldn't think of what to say!  
"Let's…meet up again tomorrow," Draco said as he got off the table, before Ron could think of anything, "I need to think this out… Thanks, by the way." He added the last bit awkwardly when he was half way the door, but Ron paid no attention to it: "What do we tell people?" he asked. This whole 'let's pretend to be gay' thing was making it complicated.

"Just - .. think of some lame excuse. Like you would, you know. It'll work out." Draco reached the door and had one hand on the door handle.  
Ron wasn't sure what he would think of, but he decided to just nod. "..what time?"

"Seven. After supper." Grey eyes drilled into blue ones last time, before the blonde left the room.

**So when Ron was back in the Gryffindor Common Room later, he was confused.** Confused, but not worried. Draco being a Death Eater was no surprise – Harry had been claiming it half the time. Draco having a life debt with him also somehow didn't quite process. It was just another fact he had learned today.  
He still felt confused though… - ah whatever.  
"Hey, where were you?" Harry asked Ron as he passed by, looking up at him from the couch they usually sat on.  
"I was er…-" Talking to Malfoy? Shit man… "..er…"  
Harry cocked a brow "…surely you know where you've been…"  
Hermione now looked up, too. "...has Ron got a girlfriend then…?" she asked in a tone Ron couldn't quite place.  
"No," Ron replied sternly, shrugging uncomfortably once more. Why couldn't they just let him be?! "I was talking to the-… madam Pince!"  
"Madam Pince?" Hermione asked, "What did you want from her?"  
Ron looked at Harry for support, but he was no help.  
"W-… She er… She thought I was someone else." He said it in an airy tone, but felt like an idiot. It wasn't nice to keep secrets from Harry and Hermione… they were his friends, they were always there for him. Or well they were always there for Harry, anyway. But it didn't seem like a good idea to tell Harry about this stuff with Malfoy quite yet… Not until he knew more, anyway. "I'm er… Gonna go for an early night."  
"It's barely eight!" Harry exclaimed.  
"Yeah… I said early. Night!"

**"...forgotten your homework twice! That's...just...I mean we are about to write our exams so soon and you don't.."**  
Ron gave a sigh and interrupted Hermione. "I know we're gonna write exams and I know what I'm doing...as long as you got the good grades we are all happy, aren't we?"

Noticing his words sounded harsher than expected he added "I mean...we're all gonna have good grades," in a softer tone and looked down at his plate.  
Hermione looked at him in shock, then turned to Harry who was opposing them. He had been listening, and now he was shaking his head silently. She nodded understandingly.

It was the morning after Ron had gone to bed surprisingly early. He felt tired though because it had taken him a while to get to sleep. Thinking of the day had kept him up; the beautiful weather they had enjoyed, then Malfoy, the Black Lake, the chat afterwards, the meeting...afterwards. When Harry had then woken him in the morning, Ron had barely slept for an hour.

"Quidditch training tonight," Harry mumbled, words aimed at Ron. His words went ignored, so he cleared his throat and asked: "Are you all right?"  
Ron looked up and drilled his eyes into Harry's. "I am,"  
"You still there?" Harry replied and grinned, but his face fell when Ron's didn't answer him all too happily.  
"Oh come on, Ron! What's the matter?" his friend said, and seemed to want to take Ron's hand that was resting next to his plate. Ron pulled his hand back though, and looked at Harry angrily; "I'm all right!"  
He then sighed; "….I'm all right, thank you."  
Hermione cleared her throat. "I don't believe you,"  
"What?" Ron spat and looked at the girl in disbelief. "What do you mean you don't believe me?!"  
Hermione nodded slightly. "I don't believe you're all right, Ronald..." Her voice was calm, but Ron didn't have the patience for it. She paused theatrically, but Harry interrupted her before she could continue.  
"Yeah, since you've saved Malfoy's arse you are different..." he exclaimed and his eyes widened.  
"I didn't mean _that_, Harry...I think it's because of Lavender,"  
Ron blushed; Harry was right... this time.  
Harry cocked a brow and eyed Ron suspiciously. "Lavender? What's with Lavender, Ron?" He leaned over the table, his face approaching Ron's; "Did you...kiss?"  
Harry was so close now that Ron could feel the other's breath over his lips as their noses were barely half an inch apart. "No," Ron replied dryly, attempting to exhale so much as he spoke, that Harry would feel the awkward too and retreat. But Harry stayed in place. His eyes challenging Ron's.

When the tension between them had become too awkward, Ron drew back. He didn't mind. He never liked power games. But when he saw a satisfied smile flash over Harry's face he instantly felt anger whirl up, making his blood start to boil. Did Harry feel superior?  
Ron kept his mouth shut and tried to suppress his anger. There was no need for it, was there?

"Well," Ron started after a moment of silence, "I won't be able to join the party tonight,"  
"The party?" Harry looked at Ron in disbelief and his smile vanished. "What party are you talking about? And why am I not invited?" Harry's eyes narrowed and he turned his head away. It's Seamus, isn't it? Throwing a party without asking if I'd like to come," Harry's nostrils quivered as he suddenly spotted Seamus sitting five seats away from them.

"Hey! Seamus...why didn't you-"  
Ron was gobsmacked. Thankfully Hermione took some initiative; "He meant the Quidditch training!"

Harry's head snapped back to Hermione - his eyes widened and his face flushed. "Right, I knew that..."  
He chuckled in an obviously fake way.

Ron shook his head and cleared his throat. "Any way, I'll-..."  
"What do you mean you can't come to the Quidditch training tonight?" Harry interrupted him. "That doesn't work, Ron! You have to come!"  
"Relax mate, it's just the training..." Ron tried, but Harry didn't listen.  
"No! You _have_ to come tonight, Ron! I mean; what kind of shitty discipline is that? You're on the team! You can't just show up whenever YOU feel like it!"  
"It's the first time I'd miss a training!"  
"So?"  
"So what?"  
"I want you to show up tonight!"  
"I can't!"  
"Why not?"

...now what? Tell him that he's got a meeting with Malfoy tonight?

"Gotta... erm... gotta-..."  
"Got to.. what?" Harry insisted, leaning over the table.  
"Gotta help Ginny with her homework tonight,"

Brilliant. What a fantastic excuse. Might as well let him in on the entire thing now, the cover was blown anyway. Helping Ginny with homework? She was the one helping him with homework usually!

Hermione gasped. "You want to help her with her homework?" she asked in a bemused tone, followed by a giggle. "Do you want her to fail her classes?"

"What the Hell is that supposed to mean?!" Ron snapped and looked at her angrily. "You know that I-.., I, erm.-.."  
Hermione cocked a brow. She gave sighed and shook her head, "that's a joke, Ron,"  
"Just tell us the truth. Why can't you come to the training tonight, hm? Is it Lavender?"  
Lavender! Why was everything going on about Lavender? Sure, Ron had had this...little thing going with her, but it had never - ever - meant anything to him.

"No!" Ron exclaimed and got up. He really - really - didn't want to talk to his friends any more. They were annoying him and freaking him out, and he had forgotten to take his pills earlier.  
"Since when do I have to justify every step I take?" he then asked and looked at them. "I won't miss the next training, all right?"  
Harry and Hermione were shocked, exchanged a glance, and nodded.  
Ron turned around and was just about to leave the Great Hall when he heard Harry shout at him. "I'll see you in class!"  
Sure. Sure he'd see him in class. That was where they all had to be in the mornings.

**"Ron...? You awake?" Harry said, poking his mate in the shoulder.**  
"Hm-hm,"  
Ron couldn't help himself, he just wasn't interested in Slughorn's talking, especially when it was about fame and wealth, achievement and profit. Slughorn's talk wasn't even addressed to Ron, since he wasn't famous.

Or smart.

...or good looking.

Some people were actually worth something.

Ron wasn't. So why should he care?

He yawned carelessly and decided to lay his head in one of his hands instead of having it on the table. He might not be a good student, a handsome one or a celebrity version... that didn't mean he wanted to be recognized as a hopeless one.

Malfoy probably didn't feel much better at the moment, did he? Ron wondered if the blonde would be better off without the Mark? Did Slughorn know he had it?  
No. How would Slughorn know? How would anyone know? Surely, Harry did expect Malfoy to be a Death Eater since...he knew what Death Eaters were, but... How would anyone else know Malfoy to be on the Dark Side? Because his father was a Death Eater? That didn't mean anything.  
… besides the fact that it did.

Ron sighed.

"Funny world," he thought, and risked a glare in Malfoy's direction. The boy was sitting upright, his eyes focussed on Slughorn in a piercing glare. The ginger wondered if Malfoy was actually... enjoying the lesson.  
No, that couldn't be. No one enjoyed it.

...Except Hermione of course.

Another sigh.

Why couldn't it just stop?

**"Well?" Ron asked and looked at Malfoy in expectation. He'd been the one wanting to talk after all.** The blonde sighed and shrugged.  
"You...wanted to talk?" Ron then said and his eyes drilled into Draco's who was now sitting on a desk, his hands clinging to its edges.  
When Draco didn't answer, Ron snapped his fingers. "Hey! You wanted to talk, right?"  
"Don't get cocky, Weasley," Draco replied politely and put on a slight smile. "Have you thought of...anything at all?"  
What the hell was that supposed to mean?  
"What the hell is that supposed to mean...thought of...of what?" Ron asked, blinking, perplexed.  
"...of a plan," Draco replied as if it was obvious.

"No, have you?" Ron replied, really hoping that Draco hadn't thought of anything as well. Otherwise he'd feel...stupid.  
"I have not,"  
"You haven't?" Ron exclaimed way too enthusiastically. "That's..." - Fantastic! "...not good,"

Draco cocked his brows and looked at Ron from a low angle. "Right..." he answered and cleared his throat. "So, I'd suggest we think of one."  
Ron nodded, feeling slightly awkward. He felt his face flushing, his mouth becoming dry. Gods, he was acting like a bloody retard.  
Take a brace, he thought to himself and took a deep breath.  
"Right...yeah...think of a plan,"

Think of a plan. Ron could do that. It wasn't like...he'd never done that before. He had. Quite often. Mostly to save Harry's arse.  
Gods.  
And this time...

"I'm not sure if we should do that," Ron whispered and looked down. Gods.  
He swallowed hard at the thought that he would have to make a plan to actually...betray Harry.

His best friend.

"I'd betray my best friend..."

"Potter is the representation of the bloody war - you can't expect him to get through unscathed."

...now what was Ron supposed to say to that?

"Well, ..." He tried, not too sure of himself.

Draco crossed his arms. He knew he was right. He didn't expect Potter's best mate to be persuaded this easily though. Was he even persuaded? He didn't know. "...plan. I need to find a way to get him to the Dark Lord's hideout."

"I know," Weasley said too quickly, as if he was about to say it.

"And as mentioned before, I can't chop him up and owl him."

Weasley didn't respond.

"They want him alive."

"That's something," Weasley said not too confidently.

"Yeah, that's the bright side for you. Now how to do that. I considered making a trail of potential heroic activities for him, just... set him up like that. But I think his nose is too high in the clouds to look at the ground for them."

Weasley actually seemed amused now; "...you got that right."

Draco looked at him for a second or two -he didn't expect that reply. He didn't mind it, either.

"...just asking him if he would please come with me seems a bit _too_-.... I can't exactly hog the Hogwarts express to get anywhere, and it's a _long_ walk."

"Hm..." Weasley agreed, and crossed his arms as well.

"...and I want to live."

"Hm-hm," Weasley agreed. Again.

"So does my Mother."

"Hm-hm."

"We have plans."

Weasley nodded.

"For later. When Father comes out of Azkaban."

"Hm...." Weasley agreed. Yet AGAIN.

It was really starting to get on Draco's nerves. "We need a plan for _now_."

"Yeah."

"We NEED a PLAN."

"I KNOW! I'm THINKING!"

Draco sighed and tried to relax a bit. Slightly; he maintained his upright posture despite leaning against the table. "What are you thinking?"

"Of a plan."

"Could you think out loud please?" Draco barely asked it – it was more like a command. He sighed through his nose.

"No." the reply was flat, emotionless. Weasley didn't seem all right.

"I can't read your mind you know," Draco tried in a less annoyed tone. Lives were at stake, sure, but if his only 'true' ally was cross with him, his was the first to go.

"Me neither if you keep talking." Flat but annoyed. Mighty talented, that boy. Draco scoffed softly and looked to the side, out the window that granted view on a tower. He kind of wanted to punch it.

Or him.

Weasley mumbled something.

"Could you speak up, please?" Again – it was a command rather than request. Draco wasn't a very patient person.

"Harry doesn't like it when he's not invited to things," the ginger repeated, semi-meekly. "Maybe... you can send him an inv-..."

"An engraved invitation to the Dark Lord's lair... Brilliant." Draco rolled his eyes. "That's the best idea ever. I would have never thought of that!"

The other's face lit up... much like Michael's face had when he'd seen Draco enter the room.

Draco continued though; "You know, while we're picking colours for it and a font, we might as well just... you know. Hang me."

That wasn't appreciated. Weasley seemed genuinely hurt now. Going angry. "Hey! At least I'm _trying_!"

"What, you want me to praise everything you suggest?"

No reply, just seething glares coming his way.

"Calm down."

"What?! You know, you're not the ONLY one asking me to THINK so much! First there's Harry breathing all over me and then there's Hermione bitching about Lavender and Harry wasn't invited to Seamus' party but there was no party and then I can't go to Quidditch, and-... I'm not actually helping Ginny with her homework." Weasley swallowed hard.

"What, you want a glass of water?'

"... I'd like that yes." the boy replied softly. He seemed ashamed of his outburst.

"Go get one. I don't want to have to deal with this, I'm in enough trouble as it is."

It was quiet for a moment.

Then: "... who did you kill?"

The question was asked so... flatly. As if it was the most normal thing in the world. Killing people.

...it sort of was.

Regardless; the words, once they processed, made Draco feel a sharp pang of guilt in his chest. A high one – it was clutching his throat and making his stomach turn at the same time.

"I don't-..."

"It might help me think of a plan." The cheeky bastard.

Draco could tell him. He could just tell the entire story, and Weasley would know and he wouldn't have to keep the secret any more. Because the big snotty ball of tears was crawling up in his ribcage now, and not being able to speak of it now might make it pop later.

In public.

"It's... secret."

No response.

"Nobody other than me knows the full story."

"That's what a secret is, yes."

"I meant-.... Right." Draco swallowed hard. "Okay, I'll tell you. But if you interrupt me once, I-. Just. Don't interrupt me."

Weasley nodded, and sat on the edge of the table. "Bring it on."

**Another A/N: We REALLY want to thank our reviewers so far! It's REALLY appreciated what you do and we hope to read many more reviews from you. We also decided to treat our reviews differently now. They are all read and much appreciated, but when you have a question or a remark, please pose it. If it catches our attention enough we will reply to it in the chapter (so we don't have to repeat ourselves). Any comments are appreciated, be as strict as you want. We can take it. BAI**


	6. Chapter 6: Girls guys gays

**Welcome to chapter six of Stains! We really hope you'll enjoy it – the slashy action shall commence shortly. A teensy warning: There might be some Happy Humpingin this chapter. There isn't really much else to say, other than 'Enjoy, and tell us what you think!'**

**Pillow talk, pillow talk  
**Another night of hearin' myself talk, talk, talk, talk  
Wonder how it would be to have someone to pillow talk with me  
I wonder how  
I wonder who

Pillow talk, pillow talk  
Another night of bein' alone with pillow talk  
When it's all said and done, two heads together can be better than one  
That's what they say  
They always say

All I do is talk to my pillow  
Talk to my pillow, talk to my pillow  
All I do is talk to my pillow  
Talk about the boy I'm gonna marry someday  
Somehow, some way, sometime

Pillow talk, pillow talk  
Another night of gettin' my fill of pillow talk  
You and I both agree there must be a boy, must be a pillow  
Must be a pillow-talkin' boy for me  
I hope I'm right  
I'd better be right

Oh, there must be a pillow-talkin' boy for me  
(We hope she's right, she'd better be right, there must be a boy)  
There must be a boy  
There must be a boy  
There must be a boy  
There MUST be a boy!  
There MUST!

'Pillow talk' by Doris Day.

**"I erm... I'm- I **_**was**_** dating a girl. Rosaly. She's... gorgeous...,"** Draco seemed to run out of breath as he said the word, and took a second to breathe; "...smart... funny..." He looked at the floor as he added; "...and a Muggle."  
Weasley's eyes grew wide in reply and he opened his mouth to say something, but changed his mind. Good.  
The pause was dragging on though. Draco had trouble determining where to begin his story.  
"I met her in the shopping centre. I bumped into her brother 'en passant', and knocked something out of his hands. I wouldn't have cared if she wouldn't have... Yeah. She had the most..."  
Draco couldn't help but smile when he thought of it; "The er,... the first thing she ever said to me was; 'Oi, watch it bimbo'." He chuckled slightly, afraid to look at the Weasley. He didn't want to know what he thought of it.  
"She said I owed them now, for causing trouble. I told her all right; what do you want. She said an apology, maybe a milkshake. I just-..." he shrugged "I thought; 'why not?' How often does a complete stranger talk to you like that, anyway? It was all good fun you know, you could tell it was her... Her sense of humour, her...-" He choked in his voice and took a break to swallow.  
"Anyway. We sort of started seeing each other more often after that. We got on well. Really really well." He felt judged now. Was Weasley glaring at him or...? He looked up from the floor to find the other look at him in complete amazement.

"What?" he snapped, feeling interrupted by the glare.

"...Oi bimbo...?" Weasley asked, genuine amazement dripping off every word. "That's the weirdest pick up line I ever heard."

Draco's cheeks flared up, he could _feel_ them turn pink. Looking at his own shoes angrily he continued; "When she and I met, it was er... I was fourteen years old I reckon. Yeah. Must have been." He inhaled through his nose and straightened his shoulders. " So... We took things slowly. Not too long ago... During my Father's trial actually, I could... I was able to move around and visit her more freely. So... I was at their home one day. Muggle home, don't ask. She was helping her mother do the washing up and Michael and I went outside, he wanted to talk to me about something." Draco swallowed hard. "He was very shy you know, unnaturally shy. But we got on somehow. She cared a great deal for him so... " He cleared his throat.

"I – we... We didn't make it out of the street. Aunt Bellatrix, she saw us. She saw me. Me with that shy looking Muggle boy." Draco crossed his arms now, and looked to the wall at his side.  
He felt Weasley's eyes on him but he refused to look at him. Looking at the floor felt safer...  
But he knew he would cry if he said this while looking down. The wall was better, definitely.

"She asked me... If I picked him for my initiation..." The pauses between his words were more heavily loaded now. Ron was afraid to breathe loud.  
"I told her-... nothing. I nodded. I couldn't speak, she caught me by surprise entirely. So... I nodded. She was... She was pleased. She took us with her immediately."  
Malfoy's voice seemed strained. Very strained. Ron shifted his weight uncomfortably, trying to make no sound at all.

"I had to... She... She did the speaking. In front of the D-Dark Lord, she,... -... she knew I didn't want it, but she... In her way, she helped me. Persuaded the Dark Lord to let me live and make me a Death Eater. To punish my Father for f-failing."

The Slytherin shivered uncomfortably, but instead of pitying the boy Ron was afraid of him.  
"I... When... Yes- we got there. We got there, and she put Michael in a different room. She and I had to speak to the Dark Lord, after all. She was... praising me... saying I wanted to be a Death Eater so much that I brought a treat for my initiation... That I would be useful because I was able to move freely inside of Hogwarts... She said I would make a good Death Eater and that I was about to prove it.  
Then I was sent back into the room where Michael was. He was just standing there, apparently someone told him to wait for me. He had no idea.  
He didn't know I was... There were people standing in the room. Just... Death Eaters. And Bellatrix entered the room behind me, and she... She knew I knew the boy. I knew she knew because she called me 'nephew' as she looked into his eyes. And he was terrified." Malfoy had been speaking fast the entire time, but now he paused briefly to swallow.

"He kept asking me where he was, who these people were, what was happening, why... Why all these people were here and who this woman was, and how we got here,... She apparated us, but... I had to... I cast Crucio on him. I had to cast Crucio on him so I did and he had no idea what was going on. It didn't work... It didn't work at all because I didn't mean it. And she told me to make him dance. So I made him dance with Imperio and he had no idea what was happening to him. And I hated myself so much then that when I... So then I had to..." Ron now noticed tears were streaming down Malfoy's face, despite his voice sounding... normal.  
Rushed, but steady.  
He still feared him.

"I then... I cast the Cruciatus curse on him... Bellatrix kept... telling me to so... I did it but I had to think of _me_. I had to think of myself to … feel enough hate to... to make it work... And then I killed him. With the killing curse, I killed him. He just wanted to talk to me and I killed him."  
Again, Malfoy paused to swallow. Ron was still terrified.

"Then I received the Mark. Bellatrix cheered for me, we had a drink together with the Death Eaters who witnessed me-...And then s-she dropped me off at-... at where she picked us up.  
And I went home, I... I didn't know what to do, I couldn't go back to.. to Rosaly, she was...  
She had no idea. So when I saw her later I told her I didn't know where Michael was, I had no idea. We... I helped her search for him. Together with her family- with the neighbourhood. I helped them search for him even though I killed him. After... after three weeks I couldn't-... I couldn't stand it any more. I couldn't lie to her, I couldn't tell her the truth either, so I-... broke up with her and..." Malfoy's voice was breaking now "...didn't... talk to her or.. didn't... mention... her,...until... " He swallowed again; "now."

He was full on crying now but trying not to, and even though Ron felt obliged to do something he was nailed to the floor. He wasn't sure if he was fearing or pitying him now, but this was definitely an uncomfortable situation. Malfoy was exactly across the room from him, but he seemed to be in a different world entirely.

"Are you done...?"  
Draco stopped crying and stiffened up entirely. "Yes," he snapped, angrily wiping the tears off his face. He was embarrassed now.  
"Because- … you said not to interrupt you, so-"  
"I know what I said."  
After half a minute of silence, Draco sighed. "...Meet me here again on Saturday."  
"It's Wednesday now."  
"I know."  
"Why not sooner?" The insecurity that shone through his words was working on Draco's nerves. Reminded him of Michael.

"Don't exaggerate the gay act. Because I say so. Saturday at eleven."  
"There's curfew you know, you can't just-..."  
"-IN THE _morning._" Draco said, before sighing again. "I'm busy before then. We need to think of a plan."  
Weasley glared to the side. Draco stroked his sleeve over his face again, making sure there were no tears left. How could he have let himself go so badly?

Without another word he walked past him, leaving the room.

**That Saturday morning Ron woke up, feeling like there was molten led in his stomach.  
**He still hadn't told Draco he wouldn't be able to make it today.  
He did consider telling Harry he wouldn't be able to make it to today's training, but that didn't seem like a good idea. As he got dressed quietly, he hoped he would be able to avoid Harry in the morning and then... fix it. He didn't know.

For the past few days Malfoy's story had been stuck in his head. He no longer feared him (which didn't mean he liked him), and he did sort of pity him. The thing that bugged him most was that he wasn't able to tell anyone about the situation though. Especially Harry and Hermione, who seemed very much aware of something going on.  
Thankfully though there was Lavender. His excuse. As long as they believed he was seeing her and not Malfoy, this would work out perfectly.

With a sigh he decided he couldn't be bothered to have a shower, and changed his clothes inelegantly next to his bed.

Ron entered the Great Hall, just as Harry exited it. "Come on, you're late." Harry said, nudging Ron with his head. He gave the other no chance to reply. "If you wanted breakfast you should have gotten up earlier," he added with a smile.

"Can I er-..." Ron started, unsure of himself. Harry cocked a brow. "I need to tell Lav where I'm at. You know..." he swallowed nervously, but Harry gave an 'understanding' look.  
"Right... See you on the field in ten minutes," he said with a nod.

Ron held his breath until harry was out of sight, and then ran into the opposing corridor to tell Malfoy he had to go to training and they could talk later.

**"There you are,"** Draco said, making the effort to look at an imaginary watch as Weasley rushed in. "Overslept?"  
There was a pause.  
"I er... Got Quidditch training."  
Draco cocked a brow; "Unexpected?"  
"No, just-..." Weasley looked nervous.  
"Then why didn't you tell me earlier?"  
Weasley sighed; "Well, I thought I could skip it, but... Harry uhm. He might notice I'm with you rather than-..."  
Draco smirked; "Yes, you know –... we have a plan for that."  
Weasley seemed genuinely confused.  
"...the entire gay thing?" Draco said, waggling his brows.  
"Oh!"  
"Yes... good morning Ronald," Draco said, shaking his head.  
The other seemed confused; "...it's weird when you say my name."

Just then the door burst open, and Lavender Brown appeared in the doorway. "WonWon!" she shouted, looking around frantically. "I heard his voice, where- WonWon!" She ran towards him, but stopped abruptly when she saw Draco stand there. "What are you doing here with that vile bully?"

Draco just grinned at the ginger in response.  
"Wh-" the boy started, but Draco interrupted him; "Tell her Ron," he said, feeling a tad uncomfortable but very amused. He loved finding out how his ideas worked in the real world.

Weasley turned pale instantly, making his freckles and hair seem like they were on fire; "I er-..."  
Lavender looked at him hopefully and full of expectation, and Draco could tell Weasley was struggling. "Come on baby..." he said, instantly feeling his own face flush. Lavender's eyes locked into his and then turned back to Weasley's in disbelief.  
Weasley shrugged clumsily.  
She shook her head, and folded her hands together as if she was about to pray as she looked the other in the eyes.  
"...WonWon..." she muttered, and he cleared his throat.  
"Why am I doing this again?" He asked, eyes on the girl but Draco knew the words were meant for him.  
"Because you love me," Draco replied without hesitation, not able to control his smug grin.  
Watching people get embarrassed still was a hobby of his.

"I'm er... gay." Weasley then said awkwardly. Draco had to control himself not to laugh out.

Lavender sniffed, then shook her head.  
"I am. And er, M-Draco is my boyfriend."  
"...WonWon-..." she shook her head again, then flung herself at him. Draco was still smirking though, which unfortunately she caught sight of. Her face turned evil and cold for a second, before a grin appeared and she slowly let go of Weasley who apparently had been trying to push her off him the entire time.

"If you're really dating..." she said softly – Draco could only barely hear her as she was whispering in Weasley's ear. "Why don't you..." - Draco felt a pang of fear now- "kiss your boyfriend...?"

Weasley pushed her away, turned around, and looked Draco dead in the eyes instantly. His face was flushed, and he seemed frantic.  
Draco swallowed hard too. He didn't really...

-"Go on then boys..."her arms were hanging by her sides now, and she was shifting her weight with mocking impatience. -

...expect things...

-Weasley swallowed audibly and took a step forward-

...to get this far...

Draco sighed, and shook his head. Weasley never looked more relieved in his life.  
"We don't kiss in front of an audience," he said as neutrally as possible. "It's private." She looked right back into his eyes, her hands turning to fists. "Piss off." he added, but she ignored him.

Draco felt a pang of fear as Lavender took a few steps forward. She looked like a raging bear!  
"Kiss him now..." she steamed, looking into Draco's eyes from a low angle "...or I will."  
Draco felt he was blushing now, but tried to ignore it. He moved his weight from the table back to his feet, and sought eye contact with the ginger.  
His heart was pounding in his throat, and he barely managed to sound 'normal' as he said 'come here then love.' The nudge with his head seemed genuine though... Yes- it must have been because Weasley approached.

Oh Gods.

Every step Weasley took, Draco's heart felt like it pounded harder. There was nothing in this room besides Weasley and him, and he had to suppress the urge to run. Then... Weasley stopped. Draco swallowed, and took one step, two steps forward...  
Awkwardly he reached for the other boy's hand, who took it even more awkwardly.  
Then he took another -smaller- step forward.

They now had the perfect kissing distance between them.  
"Well?" Lavender's voice seemed strangely far away.

Draco nodded – it was a small nod, and it was a sign to Weasley more than anything. 'I'm going to do this,' that nod said.

Weasley's entire... _being_ screamed 'no'.

Within a split second from then Draco felt lips on his own. Soft lips, and he felt bad over his own being chapped and dry. In a fraction of a second he stopped caring though, as he felt he was melting into the other's warm, soft being. He was looking at the blue eyes shutting and opening again. Those were pretty eyes, he could get used to those eyes... Quite suddenly he realized his lips were parted and he allowed his tongue to sneak out and stroke the small hollow bit under the other's lower lip, drawing a soft moan -of protest?- from him.  
The warm feeling was becoming quite hot – he always liked kissing. Not like he was some player kissing everyone, but he really enjoyed it.

...there honestly was no better foreplay than snogging someone for a minute or two.

"G_erROF_!" Ron shouted, shoving Malfoy off him and wiping his sleeve over his face to get the Malfoy-ness off of it; "You're overdoing it, okay?"  
Malfoy was bright pink in the face, and seemed to break a sweat.

Ron was feeling much like that – at least he was when he realized Malfoy was rubbing his hardon against his leg. When Malfoy didn't reply but just looked at Ron with big frantic eyes, he sighed and tried to put his shirt right. "She ran out when you added tongue."

As pink as Malfoy was before, that's how pale he was now. "It's part of the act," he said, not sounding very convincing.

Three seconds of intense but awkward eye contact followed. Then Malfoy looked at the door and marched by Ron, his face slightly turned away from him.

When Malfoy was gone, Ron started to feel his pills kick in properly. He knew he was panicking... he also knew he didn't notice because of the pills. He had to take another one before attending training, or he'd start to cry soon.

**"Hello Ron," Harry said, hovering a above the ground on his broomstick and looking down on the other as he entered the field.** "Want to hear something funny?"

Ron looked up against Harry's dark silhouette – WHY was he hovering in front of the bloody sun? And why didn't he ask why he was so late? It didn't seem right that he didn't ask about the excuses Ron would have then tried to make up. "S-sure," Ron stammered, the thought of mounting his broom not crossing his mind.

"Just after you said you were going to see Lavender, Lavender ran up to me asking me where you went. " Harry said, his face aimed in the general direction of the hoops. His body was still aimed at Ron, who was starting to feel uncomfortable. "Shortly after she ran by me again.  
Crying now."

Harry looked back at Ron, and even though the latter couldn't see his eyes he could feel they were on him; "What was the punchline again...? Oh yeah – She said you were snogging Malfoy."  
Ron looked away.  
"Isn't that a killer?" Harry asked in an unidentified tone, landing his broom.  
Ron looked away further, responding with a slight delay to Katie Bell greeting him with a wave.

"Ron..." Harry waited until his friend was looking into his eyes before continuing. Then he placed a hand on his shoulder; "It's all right."  
Ron seemed surprised, so Harry gripped his mate's shoulder a bit firmer before sliding his hand off.  
"It's all right," he smiled; "I mean – I don't like Malfoy myself, but... If you want to snog the git then,.. well I won't stand in your way." He nodded.

Ron shrugged uncomfortably, and then … shrugged again. He seemed at a loss of words.

**Later that day the tension in the Great Hall was tangible.** Everyone had their eyes on Ron, Draco, and... Pansy. Pansy who was practically on Draco's lap, Pansy who was fussing over him, Pansy who was doing his hair right, Pansy who was clinging to his arm and saying "I love you so much"...  
Lavender glaring at them... and at Ron...  
Ron didn't care much though. He probably would if the pills didn't work so well. Hermione seemed stressed with him. Lavender was full on giving him evils.  
And Harry...  
Well, Harry was just confused.  
"I thought you two were a couple?" he asked, apparently too confused to take a sip from the glass he was holding.  
"Yeah we are. We're very much in love." Ron shrugged. "But he's not really out yet so-"  
"How is he not out?" Hermione interrupted him, sounding snappy; "The entire school knows!"  
Ron shrugged again. He really didn't care enough.

******dont talk to me says ( 19:54 ):  
**what the hell?  
**S1793837 says ( 20:04 ):**  
Hello.  
**dont talk to me says ( 20:05 ):  
**youre really gay arent you?  
**S1793837 says ( 20:10 ):**  
I don't want to talk to you on MDM. I heard Peeves tends to get in and read conversations.  
**dont talk to me says ( 20:10 ):  
**why do you take so long to reply?  
**S1793837 says ( 20:11 ):**  
Pansy.  
**dont talk to me says ( 20:11 ):  
**same place as usual then?  
**S1793837 says ( 20:13 ):**  
See you there in a few minutes.

**Malfoy took more than 'a few minutes' to get there.** In fact - it took him half an hour. He seemed a bit overheated, but Ron didn't care. "If I would have known you were actually gay I wouldn't have agreed you know," he said without giving the other to enter the classroom properly.  
Malfoy's face fell, for as far as it could from the way it was; "I'm not gay," he said, his heated face now looking embarrassed on top. "I just... It was... you know; And- maybe you're just a good kisser?"  
Ron was now embarrassed too.  
"And – well I have been... under a lot of stress lately and... it didn't mean anything, don't think it has anything to do with you, perhaps it was having an audience?"  
Ron looked at the ground, then looked back at Malfoy again;"...you really are gay, aren't you?"  
Malfoy sighed in the most annoyed and childish way Ron had ever seen from him: "No,  
I'm-... bisexual." He looked at the ceiling and then back at Ron again; "Don't worry, you're not my type anyway."

"Harry says it's all right that I'm snogging you."  
"...woop dee doo."  
Ron furrowed his brows and then chuckled. This was a weird situation, wasn't it? "I don't have a problem with gay people you know. My brother – Charlie, he's gay too."

Draco "...good for him." What good was this information to him? He didn't know this Charlie, nor was he gay himself. He was bisexual! Variety makes the world go round, right?  
...Weasley really was a good kisser though. He swallowed a lump when the thought of Rosaly came up in his head again, and he decided it was time to say something to distract himself from her. "We should be using each other's first names."  
"..Draco..?"  
"Yes. Ron...ald. Ron?"  
Wea- _Ron_ nodded.

It was quiet for a while. Then; "Do they uh... say anything? In Slytherin,- about me I mean?"  
Draco laughed softly –almost sadly. "You don't really want to know."  
"...I do."

"Fine then," Draco sat down on the teacher's desk, eyes on a random table in front of him.  
"They say that me falling from grace is no reason for me to be rolling around in the dirt. They also said it's a bit late f-or me to join the other side, and they said that... well," he swallowed "..my father would hear about this, so..."

Ron looked at Draco awkwardly. He asked what Slytherins were saying about _him_, not about the other, but... this hurt any way. "Well, at least you're alive."

Draco scoffed.

**It was Monday now, and the Great Hall was filled with zombies.** As in – most students were half asleep and unable to function as human beings. Ron was fairly awake though. There was food in front of him, how _could_ he be sleeping? He took a big bite from a sandwich with yet unidentified but very tasty smelling topping, but instantly lost his appetite when he saw the owls fly in. He knew his family were all right with homosexuality because they were always all right with Charlie,but... For some reason he expected them to make a drama out of him 'being with ' Malfoy. Or they would ask about his pills before even mentioning Malfoy.  
That seemed like them.  
The only mail for him was the Daily Prophet though, apparently news about Malfoy and him hadn't reached home yet.  
With a sigh of relief he opened the newspaper and read the headlines. He couldn't be bothered to read more than that quite yet.  
His sandwich did suddenly taste a lot better.

"Drake?" he suddenly heard Pansy shriek from across the Great Hall, and he looked up to see what the matter was along with the rest of the students present. "You all right? Did someone die? Let me read that, come on-" Pansy was reaching for a letter Draco was holding, but he didn't even try to keep it out of her reach which was probably the reason she stopped trying to take it.

Malfoy looked... paler than ever. 'No' Ron could just see him mouth – the chatter in the Great Hall commenced so he couldn't hear the Slytherins any more. He said something else to Pansy, before raising his head and looking right into Ron's eyes.

Something was wrong.


	7. Chapter 7: No family matters

**A/N: Here we go, chapter SEVEN of Stains! Updated on June 5th, Draco's birthday! Thanks to Clare (Pansy!) for beta-ing the letter! Hope you enjoy!**

**Are you aware of what you make me feel, baby?**  
Right now I feel invisible to you, like I'm not real.  
Didn't you feel me lock my arms around you?  
Why'd you turn away?  
Here's what I have to say...  
I was left to cry there, waiting outside there  
Grinnin' with a lost stare,  
That's when I decided...

Why should I care?  
'Cause you weren't there when I was scared  
I was so alone...  
You, you need to listen!  
I'm startin' to trip,  
I'm losin' my grip  
And I'm in this thing alone...

Am I just some chick you placed beside you,  
To take somebody's place?  
When you turn around can you recognize my face..?  
You used to love me, you used to hug me  
But that wasn't the case,  
Everything wasn't okay..

I was left to cry there  
Waiting outside there  
Grinnin' with a lost stare  
that's when I decided

Why should I care?  
'Cause you weren't there when I was scared,  
I was so alone  
You, you need to listen  
I'm startin' to trip  
I'm losin' my grip  
And I'm in this thing alone

Cryin' out loud  
I'm cryin' out loud  
Cryin' out loud  
I'm cryin' out loud

Open your eyes  
Open up wide

Why should I care  
'Cause you weren't there when I was scared,  
I was so alone

Why should I care  
'Cause you weren't there when I was scared,  
I was so alone  
Why should I care?  
If you don't care, then I don't care  
We're not going anywhere

Why should I care?  
'Cause you weren't there when I was scared  
I was so alone  
Why should I care?  
If you don't care, then I don't care  
We're not goin' anywhere

'Losing grip' by Avril Lavigne

_**Draco,**_

_Azkaban regulation requires all incoming and outgoing mail being thoroughly examined before reaching its destination, therefore I cannot elaborate on the topic without disgracing the family name even further. A few days ago word reached me of an unfortunate event regarding the Black Lake, and a certain member of a certain family taking full advantage of the situation en plein publique.  
I paid it no mind, in the false assumption you had the mind and heart to not humiliate me any further. In your benefit I assumed the information reaching me was a misinterpretation of the actual events taking place that day.  
To my deepest and sincerest regret word reached me you have been conducting a rather inappropriate relation to same said member of same said family.  
I am aware of your disappointment in our family bearing in mind my situation at present, and I understand your loyalties wavering by finding new and possibly more powerful acquaintances. But you know my opinion on the sort you chose to be part of and the peculiar interest you have developed.  
I have watched you your entire life and I am well aware of your thoughts, opinions and those phases a child inevitably passes through. For you they consist of a steady spiral downward.  
As mentioned; I am aware of your disappointment in our family's current disposition, but I see no need for you to add to the disgrace. If you desire to do so I am not willing to bear any consequences your behaviour may have, or any relation to you if you insist on continuing this humiliating display of immoral perversions.  
To be clear Draco, I do not wish to be in any way associated with you unless you can guarantee the entire situation is nothing but a misunderstanding._

_Lucius Malfoy_

**Ron handed the parchment back to Draco,** whose eyes were watering up. He was shaking. "He's... telling you not to write to him...?" Ron asked, not sure if he understood what he just read.  
He could see the blonde attempt to stifle his sobs in his throat and then shake his head.

"H-he's-... kicking me out-..." the boy managed, before quickly hiding his face in his hands as he burst into tears.  
Ron would have probably responded more if it wasn't for the damn pills. "He writes complicated."  
Draco didn't respond; he was too busy trying to stop crying. It seemed like he was sort of nodding though.

It was making Ron feel like he needed another pill. He sighed, and watched as Draco slid down against the wall to sit on the floor.

"Why, because we're pretend dating?" he asked, looking down on the other.  
Draco was shaking quite badly as he was crying, but he managed to nod big enough to have Ron recognize it.  
"But we're not really dating," he said, hoping to cheer the other up. "So you can just-"

"If I'd t-tell him,-" Draco's sobs weren't allowing him to speak normally, "he-he'd know-, th-the cover w-would be blown, and p-people would-would know and we will die..." his voice trailed off and was then smothered by half suppressed sobs.

"Yeah... don't want to die either... Your dad's a homophobe then?" Ron asked, knowing he should feel uncomfortable and knowing he _would_ if it wasn't for the pills.

Draco didn't reply.

"...he doesn't know you dated a Muggle then?"

Draco shook his head.

After a few seconds of silence (only interrupted by the sounds of crying) that strangely enough wasn't awkward, Ron decided to join Draco on the floor. The blonde was still suppressing his sobs and didn't seem to notice him.

"Hey..." Ron tried, looking at the other who apparently ignored him. "It will be all right you know. We'll think of some brilliant plan and then you can explain to your dad that it was just an act."

"I-if I g-get Mother killed h-he w-w-on't want to t-talk to m-m-me-," Draco managed, still trying desperately to stop crying.

Ron sighed; They used to be best friends... then he saved him from the Black Lake... Gave him mouth-to-mouth... They were pretending to be a _couple_... surely he could try to cheer him up as well.

"Hey... is that what you call Slytherin determination?" he asked, feeling like he needed to take another pill soon.

Draco didn't respond to him.

"We're going to solve this, all right?" he tried, before deciding some more support wouldn't hurt.

He managed to put his arms around Draco's shoulders, and was surprised to find the other tense up to the touch initially. When he relaxed again, his attempts to stifle his sobs seemed to be more successful.

"**So.. what's that stuff with Pansy all about?"** Ron asked after a while when Draco calmed down again. "Now we're pretend dating she seems to be a lot closer to you."

"Ah yeah... She always fancied me..." Draco's voice was still unsteady. "But now it just... seemed reasonable to 'date' her so I don't seem so gay... " He shrugged; "a cover for a cover... " The way he trailed off didn't allow Ron to reply, even though it was quiet for a while after.

"We should be thinking of a plan," the blonde then added.

Ron nodded. "Yeah... " He had no idea whatsoever as to what this plan might be. He did notice though that the main reason they were meeting up was so Draco didn't feel so alone. It was unpronounced and not very obvious, but obvious enough to him. Why else hadn't they even MENTIONED the plan sooner?  
It was for this exact reason that he hadn't removed his hand from Draco's shoulder. Draco didn't seem to be aware of it still being there...

"We need to find a way to get him out of the castle, to the Dark Lord's hideout." he nodded slightly as he spoke; "And we can't Apparate on Hogwarts grounds.. there is no way I'm going into the Forbidden Forest if I can prevent it... and I'm not waiting for the holidays because then it'll just be... insanely crowded."

Ron's own legs were spread out carelessly, laying unflatteringly on the floor. Draco had one knee up with his foot on the floor as a sort of wall between them, the other foot against the ankle of the first. Draco's right elbow was on his knee, and he used the hand to indicate the fingers on his other hand to list the options. It was like he was giving a speech, and if it weren't for the two of them sitting on the floor with their backs against the wall it probably would have looked like that.

"So... We need to look around the castle to find something we can use... " suddenly he turned to look at Ron, and seemed taken aback when he realized how close the other was because his cheeks got a pink tint to them. "...unless you have an idea." he said slightly awkwardly as he tensed up.  
Ron got the hint and withdrew his hand; "I don't have an idea."

Draco looked at his hands. Then he turned them into fists. Why did this have to be so bloody difficult? 'Bring me Potter alive'... what kind of assignment was that anyway? Chopping him up and owling him into pieces was becoming more tempting by the minute. Feeling uncomfortable he scooted away from Ron slightly.

He wasn't used to people being this close to him, and to be honest it scared him. It hadn't bothered him before, but when he then realized how close the other was the awkward had set in. He was glad the hand was gone, but he did feel strangely cold now.

Even more so when he felt a piece of parchment with the tips of his fingers as he scooted over.

Everybody was leaving him, weren't they? Father once by getting locked up over failing to get a stupid piece of glass from a group of stupid teens, then a second time with that letter... Michael.. even though he couldn't exactl- _don't think of it don't think of it –_ Rosaly... _at least TRY not to think of her_... Entire Slytherin seemed to have turned against him – he knew for a fact not every member of his House was against him, but the ones who weren't were keeping quiet about it. That and Pansy of course... but now he was 'allowing' her to be all over him she seemed to be more distant with him somehow. That was probably just him being weird though.

Crabbe and Goyle were definitely out of the picture now – they were stupid bullies. He expected no different from them. Strange how people you took for granted entirely can still be missed.

He had Weasley though. Ron. Yes. First names. They got on strangely well, but that was probably because their lives were at stake. He was glad he had him though, if it wouldn't be for Ron he'd feel terribly alone right now.

Though his Father would still be on his side...

The thought of his Father disposing of him had been eating his brain the entire day, but miraculously he had managed to attend classes as if nothing was wrong. Pansy read enough of the letter to know what was going on, and she had been respectfully modest towards him. Everyone knew something was up with him – he could tell by the looks he received. Or he imagined it. He didn't care.

Point was he managed all the way through classes, lunch, more classes, supper, and then all the way here, to the classroom that was too small to have a normal lesson in, before he broke down in front of Ron.

The thought of his 'breakdown' was embarrassing, and he knew he would be angry at himself about it if crying and then trying to stop it hadn't exhausted him so. He felt fluffy and hollow. Closed off from the world. The awkwardness of looking into Weas-Ron's face before snapped him out of it, but the moment he sat like this again he felt himself slip back into the sad mood.

He picked up the parchment again and didn't look at it until he unfolded it.

"..._the false assumption you had the mind and heart to not humiliate me any further._" Did he have the faintest-...? If he knew WHY Draco was doing this he wouldn't have done this. Disposed of him like that. But there was no way for Draco to tell him – enough Death Eaters were caught just because they wrote suspicious letters to inmates.

"_But you know my opinion on the sort you chose to be part of and the peculiar interest you have developed._" How would he have responded if he knew about Rosaly?  
Hm. He'd never know.

"..._I am well aware of your thoughts, opinions and those phases a child inevitably passes through. For you they consist of a steady spiral downward._" Was that really necessary? He was practically saying he disliked him more as he grew up, wasn't he? Did that mean he would have kicked him out anyway even if it wasn't for Ron?  
Did his Father care for him at all?  
How could one decide to '_not wish to be in any way associated with_' their own flesh and blood? The child you raised yourself?

_I'll tell my Father about this._ How often had he said that? Why had his Father helped him at all? Just to boost his own ego? To feel more confident about himself?  
Draco sighed through his nose, dimly aware of Ron's eyes on him. He then lowered the letter - he didn't want to read it any more. The wall he was now looking at was more cheerful.

"I'll be right back," the boy next to him then said as he got up. Draco looked up, confused, but then nodded. He probably needed the loo or something.  
"...do come back," he said when the other reached the door.

**Ron felt bad leaving the other boy alone.** Not like Draco Malfoy was the self harming type – it just didn't seem right. He shook his head at the thought and went to the Gryffindor Common Room.

"Ron, where have you been?" Hermione asked the moment the portrait of the Fat Lady swung open."Draco," Ron replied, glad he didn't have to think of some shitty excuse. He wasn't a good liar, but when it came to Hermione (or his mum) he was downright terrible.

Without another word he passed by her, on his way to the boy's dorms when Ginny suddenly appeared in front of him.

"Draco, hm?" she asked, an expression on her face Ron couldn't quite place. He nodded in response. "What's the matter with him?" she asked as she crossed her arms.

Hermione -who apparently had sneaked up on them- stood next to them; "I was about to ask the same thing, he's been looking weird all day. Did you have a fight?"

Ron failed to hide his annoyance – meaning he needed his bloody pill. The girls meant well, he knew that, but he couldn't use this right now. And what should he tell them, anyway? Draco and him hadn't talked about what was in the letter, not concerning how much of it other people were allowed to know.

...and Ginny. He couldn't lie to Hermione, his mum, or Ginny. They were practically the same person.

"We didn't have a fight, and it's none of your business anyway," he said, in the faint hope that answer would satisfy them.

"Do you mind?" He'd pick Ginny up by the shoulders and put her down somewhere else if she wouldn't step aside.

Thankfully that wasn't necessary.

In the dorm he got his pills, took one, and pocketed the bottle. He didn't want to have to come back all the way here just for those buggers, and he had no idea how long he was staying with Draco in that classroom. Granted, he needed one pill per day, but he could never be sure.

Immediately blissful equanimity took over. His mind working on 50 percent he went to the bathroom, after that grabbed his pyjamas, clean underwear and a schoolbook (Transfiguration? He wasn't sure), and then went back down.

"What's the matter with Malfoy?" Harry asked the moment Ron was back in the Common Room. "His father kicked him out over being with me," Ron answered flatly, not even pausing to look at his friends' and sister's shocked faces. Without exchanging another word he walked on, back to Draco.

"**What have you brought?" ** the blonde asked, sitting on the teacher's desk now, his father's letter laying behind him. "A plan; you know the Room of Requirement? Where you busted Dumbledore's Army last year? There might be something we can use there."

Draco cocked a brow and then nodded approvingly. "What's that though?" he asked, nodding in the direction of Ron's hand.

"Euh... " Ron looked down at his hand and then looked at the other, suddenly feeling embarrassed for taking the things. "Nothing..."

"What book is that?"

Ron held it up to read the cover, dropping his underwear in the process.

"Oh, Transfiguration... Nice." Draco replied, looking at the white boxershorts with brown stripes. "Any particular reason you're flaunting your junk like that?"

Ron rushed to pick up his underwear, and hid them in his pyjama T-shirt. "We should just go to the Room of Requirement," he said, not in the mood to be embarrassed like this.

Draco took the letter, folded it and put it in his pocket. "You've got big plans then?" he asked as he got off the table. Ron gave him a confused look. "Humour. Never mind."

"No tell me!" Ron said impatiently, following Draco who passed him as he stood still in confusion out of the room.

"I said never mind."

"I want to know though! I saved your life, the least thing you can do is explain your shit jokes."

Draco clearly wasn't happy with that response, but he gave in anyway. "The Room of Requirement makes whatever you require_, y_ou told me we should just go there, and you took clean underwear. _So_ I asked if you had big plans."

Ron chuckled in a sigh. Draco shook his head but seemed pleased the other liked it.

**The Room of Requirement was a mess. **Nothing but a mess. If anything it was like somebody's attic. Ron wasn't pleased. Bloody room making his idea look stupid.

Draco looked around though, and seemed to be looking for something. Ron looked around too without actually expecting to find anything he could use.

"Found anything yet?" he asked when Draco looked up from checking in a desk drawer. They'd barely been inside for a minute though so he didn't expect a satisfying answer.

"Keep looking," Draco replied shortly.

"There has to be something here otherwise it would have changed already," Draco then muttered.

That seemed reasonable.

Ron stood and looked around, allowing Draco to do the uncovering and dusting off – basically the actual searching. After a few minutes though Draco pulled a blanket off a strangely tall and narrow wooden cabinet-like construction.

"What's that?" he asked, earning himself an eyeroll from the blonde. "A lift," he said dryly, carefully touching the metal decorations.

When Ron realized what Draco said was sarcastic, it was too late to reply to it without looking like an idiot. "I think it's-ah..." Apparently Draco's skilled fingerwork hit the spot, because the wooden thing swung open inaudibly. "Well it looks like a Vanishing Cabinet. They're mentioned in some of our history books."

Ron sighed. Of course. The Malfoys had a library at home.

"I don't quite fancy getting into it to see where it takes me though..." the blonde said, looking from the top right of his eyes as he thought. Then he turned to Ron; "Volunteers?"

"Nah, thanks." Ron replied, stepping back just in case. "I don't really er-... no."

"We should find one," Draco said, the cabinet again carefully and stroking the metal decorations one more time with a flat hand before stepping back and looking at the top of it. Then he slowly walked around it for as far as he could – there was quite some junk around it.

"It doesn't seem to be damaged but-... what do I know." He sighed, stroked some random items off the table with his arm and then sat down on it.

Ron sighed, patted the 'Vanishing Cabinet', and jumped back when it opened. He rushed to close it again and made sure not to touch it after.

Then he approached Draco who was looking right into his eyes, making him feel more embarrassed. Just when he was about to look away, Draco said "...it seems eager to have you inside though."

Ron sighed; "Your humour sucks so much." He then inelegantly swooped some junk off the table as well, and sat down beside Draco keeping 'appropriate distance' and some junk between them.

"Now what?" Ron asked after about twenty seconds of silence.

"Hm... I'm not stepping into that thing to see where it takes me – nor are you, … sending Potter's number one fan in with that camera of his SEEMS decent but... he'd probably 'tell on us', … We could write a note asking who's there and where are you but... Nobody in their right mind would reply to that truthfully, … then there's Dobby, but chucking him in there and tell him to report back is-... well let's say as smart as putting Potter's fan in there."

Draco quickly placed his hands on his knees when he realized he was counting the options on his fingers again, and felt a blush creep up when he realized Ron noticed. As he looked at him -stared him dead in the eyes, actually – he also stopped swinging his legs and straightened his back, squared up his shoulders and raised his chin.

Much to his annoyance Ron just chuckled. "What is that?" he asked, unpleasantly relaxed in comparison. Draco narrowed his eyes; "proper posture. You should try it; a bag of potatoes is more graceful than you are."

Ron smirked and shook his head; "You look like someone shoved a broomstick up your ass."

Draco felt his face flush; "It's _proper posture_, and for your information; not everything with sophistication is _gay_."

Ron just laughed more, and Draco got off the table. "It's about _culture_ and _civilization_, things you had to lack in your childhood."  
"At least my parents love me," Ron retorted, realizing a split second too late that that was not the right remark to make.

Once again Draco's face went from blushing pink to strangely pale as he stiffened up and narrowed his eyes. His mind was racing, desperately searching for a remark that might perhaps hurt half as much as that... there was nothing.

Ron slid off the table to apologize properly, but the way Draco was looking at him held him back. He could only watch as he saw the other open his mouth repeatedly to find a reply, and felt a strong -nearly painful- pang of guilt when he saw the blonde cross his arms subconsciously.

Then it stopped.

Draco stopped trying to think of a reply and slow, very slowly, turned away from Ron and walked away.  
"-ey, I'm... sorry, okay? I didn't mean t-"

Ron felt interrupted when Draco did nothing but raise a flat hand. He didn't even stop walking, didn't let his head down – instead leaned his back against a clean space of wall and then slid down to the floor again.

This time though both knees were pulled up, providing support for his elbows as he unfolded and read the letter again.

Not feeling too sure of himself, Ron approached the blonde. What was he supposed to say? He had already apologized, hadn't he?  
Just when he was about to open his mouth to say something, there was a sound. Draco heard it too, he immediately jumped up and drew is wand, dropping the letter in the process.

His forearms crossed, wand in his left hand, he approached the source of the sound. Ron wasn't nervous about it before, just startled. But the way Draco responded to it was giving him the creeps.

The more steps Draco took, the slower he went. There was more sound now – apparently it came from the Vanishing Cabinet. Ron, too, drew his wand, and made sure to stay behind the other.

Draco opened the Vanishing Cabinet again and immediately stepped away from it. It seemed he was prepared for the worst.

In the cabinet was a man. "A beggar?" Draco asked, wand aimed at the man who raised his hands as if to ask for mercy. Attached to his right hand was the Hand of Glory. Ron heard about that; Harry told him that thing took a hold of his hand a few years ago. Apparently it hadn't given him a special treatment. "..and a shoplifter?" the blonde added, something like a sneer in his voice.

The man made half an attempt to reach for his wand but when Draco almost shoved his wand up the man's nose he raised his hands again.

"Where are you from?" he asked, tapping his wand to the tip of the man's chin once. The man stepped back so far so unexpectedly he made the Cabinet wobble. Ron feared it'd tip over for a second.

"...Borkin an' Burke's," the man said, apparently relaxing a bit now he got the chance to look at the one threatening him. "Where's this? "

"Is there a Cabinet there?" Draco asked, ignoring the man's question.

The man seemed annoyed; "What's it to you, boy? And where's this?" he asked, apparently ready to step out of the Cabinet.

Draco... let him, eyeing him suspiciously. Ron didn't understand what was going on so he kept his wand aimed at the man who was looking around like a child in a sweet shop.

"...you were hiding for the shop keepers?" Draco asked, eyes on the man. The man didn't respond, just looked around hungrily.

Ron stepped back as the man came closer to him, though he seemed to have no intention of attacking. Absent-mindedly he tried to get the Hand of Glory off his wrist, meanwhile looking at the things in the Room.

"Take whatever you want, just leave us alone" Draco said, making a gesture with his head towards the Cabinet that Ron didn't understand.

"Just-..." Draco looked around; "Don't take those, they're a precious family piece."

The man immediately looked at Draco, followed his gaze and took the jewellery Draco was looking at. "Sorry child, 's mine now."

Draco waggled his brows at Ron, who still didn't know what he was trying to say.

"Fine! Take it! Whatever!" Draco tossed his wine aside. "Fuck family possessions, what good are they to me? He hates me! He bloody hates me! Why would I care? B-but please... don't take..." tears were actually streaming down his face now and his voice broke – definitely enough drama to make the man turn away from where Ron knew the door to the hallway was.

Ron was amazed by Draco's acting.

Draco quickly took a step aside, violently trying to wipe his tears off his face. "Just-,...don't-,..." he sobbed, standing with his back against a table. The man quickly approached, obviously interested. He shoved Draco aside, apparently something the blonde anticipated. Immediately he made the same gesture with his head again, and Ron got it this time. Together they simply shoved the guy back in the cabinet. Because of the surprise element he had no time to protest, especially when Draco cast a quick 'Obliviate!' on him before closing the door. The blonde leaned against the door, holding it shut until the same sound they heard before was heard again.

Once again, it was quiet (apart from Draco's irregular breath).

Ron understood now Draco didn't act... he just lied. That he wasn't crying before was the only part he acted.

"**It was … very lucky that that guy decided to hide there just when we were wondering about it."** Ron said, sitting next to Draco who was drawing some sort of table. "Hm... it's the Room of Requirement," the blonde replied, sounding distracted.

It was quiet for a while, and Ron watched Draco write down the alphabet repeatedly, starting at a different point every time.

"What...are you doing...?"  
"...writing..."

A while later, Draco was all done. He showed Ron a piece of parchment:

_G L T Y I E F E K H R E F L X U K Y N F X U I P V R W V K S N V I Z E J Q M I Z X S V R X Z M J O S G N M J N R S I Y N X I H P J U B Y R H R C R X X A X K G L T O M Z R S J A M Y N R V L X L B X I L V P U I G L_

"It's Vigenère code," Draco explained to the back of the parchment. "It's a letter to my aunt. She knows how to crack it." He looked at Ron's face just to enjoy the sight of confusion and the sense of superiority that came with it. "See – here I have the table... it says the alphabet as you'd normally use it. But if you look here-" he indicated the first column with the back of his quill- "you'll see it says 'nephew'. That's our code word. Basically you pick a word, then write the alphabet down in normal order starting at the letter of the word... see..., got the alphabet down seven times, once normal...-" Ron nodded "- so... then you write the letter... going down one row per letter... makes sense?"

After a few seconds Ron nodded; "So... what does it say?"

"There is a Vanishing cabinet in Hogwarts, and its twin is in Borgin and Burkes. If you can get it to the hideout, I can get Potter there."


	8. Chapter 8: Suckage

**Welcome to chapter eight of Stains! **** It's Melanie's birthday today June the 30th , and we're going to pretend that's the reason this chapter ****is the first properly M-rated chapter! (while really it's a beautiful coincidence) Prepare for some happy humping **_**plus**_**...**

**Electricity, eye to eye.**  
Hey don't I know you? I can't speak.  
Strip my senses on the spot,  
I've never been defenceless,  
I can't even make sense of this.  
You speak and I don't hear a word.

What would happen if we kissed?  
Would your tongue slip past my lips?  
Would you run away?  
Would you stay?  
Or would I melt into you?  
Not tonight, lust to lust,  
Spontaneously combust.

The room is spinning out of control.  
You act like you didn't notice, brushed my hand.  
Forbidden fruit, ring on my finger.  
You're such a moral mortal man.  
Would you throw it away?  
No question.  
Will I pretend I'm innocent?

What would happen if we kissed?  
Would your tongue slip past my lips?  
Would you run away?  
Would you stay?  
Or would I melt into you?  
Not tonight, lust to lust,  
Spontaneously combust.

What would happen if we kissed?

I struggle with myself again.  
Quickly the wall, I'm crawling.  
Don't know if I can turn away.

What would happen if we kissed?  
Would your tongue slip past my lips?  
Would you run away?  
Would you stay?  
Or would I melt into you?  
Not tonight.  
If we kissed  
What would happen if we kissed?  
Would your tongue slip past my lips?  
Would you run away?  
Would you stay?  
Or would I melt into you?  
Not tonight.  
If we kissed. If we kissed.

'If we kissed' by Fiona Apple.

"**So... you're getting Potter in there, hand him over, and that's that?**" Ron asked, surprised at how 'simple' it was. Immediately he realized there was FAR more to it than that. Harry would be in Death Eater hands!  
Draco's initial lack of response made Ron feel a pang of nervousness in his stomach.  
"...I have no way of getting him in there," the blonde said after a while. "You already said he thinks I'm a Death Eater, now you reckon he'll allow me to shove him into the Cabinet?" he scoffed; "no way." He turned to Ron; "You have to lure him here."  
"M-me?"  
Draco nodded.  
"But I'm his best mate!"  
"Yes. That's exactly why it will work."  
"I don't want to betray my best mate."  
"Then we die."  
"...aw, man," Ron sighed, kicking something imaginary in front of him. What was up with the extreme consequences to everything? Hogwarts seemed to be one big battlefield, no matter who he was with.

...though one could argue The Boy Who Lived and a Death Eater weren't the best company to chose if one wanted to avoid near death situations.

"Right. So you're going to hang out with him more. I don't know. You two have been talking less and less since we're 'dating' haven't you?" - Ron nodded – "So you should pick up contact with him again... I don't know... tell him I have family matters to deal with. He'll have a laugh, and then you can talk about me or something. Then you'll be closer, it'll be like old times, yatta yatta ya, and then you can one day say you saw something you want to show him here." Draco interrupted himself to yawn and adjust his shoulders; "Then you take him here, I'll miraculously appear, we chuck him in the cof- _Cabinet_, and it's all done."

Ron nodded and couldn't help but yawn too; "That sounds too easy," he said afterwards. Draco actually smiled. Not a sneer, not a grin, but a proper smile; "There's nothing else to it."

He turned to look at the rubbish surrounding them, his smile still intact. "Then I can tell Father it was indeed a misunderstanding, the Dark Lord will reward me, the war will be over and... " he shrugged, "I don't know, happily ever after."

Ron looked at the things around them too, now, trying to envision an identically glorious ending to the mess they were in. "...Shit." he then said, practically unprovoked. Draco turned to him, face falling; "what is it?"  
"It's past curfew, how the Hell are we getting back to our Common Rooms?"  
Draco shrugged; "You're more prepared for a sleepover than I am."  
Ron chuckled: "My brother, Charlie? He er-... he told me that you always have to take your pyjamas with you. Because you never know how long you're going to stay where with who."

Bemused, Draco shook his head. "He's the gay one, isn't he?"  
"...yeah. And he's a dra-..." Wait, should he even tell Draco that?  
"He's a what?" the question didn't seem all too interested... Ah, what the Hell. Draco had already proven to be quite open-minded, far more than Ron could have possibly imagined him to be. Surely another random detail wouldn't hurt. "He's a drag queen."  
Draco cocked a brow. "Like wearing dresses and stuff?"  
"Yeah.. it goes beyond that though... he lives and works in Romania, he's a dragon tamer. Or well – he makes sure dragons aren't a threat to society. It's really tough work, and I don't know, he likes to do drag in his time off."  
"...nice." Draco replied with furrowed brows. Ron was anticipating an awkward silence and for a second he regretted mentioning Charlie, but then Draco asked an unexpected question; "You tried it too?"  
"W-Drag?"  
Draco nodded.  
"Well, no, I just... I don't know. No. I just sort of … I...wore nail polish... Eye shadow, too..."  
Draco nodded absent mindedly, looking at the wall ahead. "...Ah... yes... the eye shadow..."

"Did you try it?" Ron replied, amazed at the response.

Draco shook his head, still looking at random rubbish dreamily. "Michael er... did. Nobody knew... I think... that day he took me outside to talk to him? To ask me something? I think he was going to ask me not to tell anybody."

Ron didn't know what to say to that. Draco murdered this boy...

"No, I just saw him once when he thought nobody was around. He was wearing R- his sis- ROSALY's dress. And make up." He shrugged and looked down.  
"...you're not going to cry again, are you?" Ron asked carefully. Immediately Draco's eyes were in his, and he wasn't looking happy. "I- just-... No offence mate, it's just so legally awkward!"

Silence.

Then- "_Legally_ awkward?" The blonde cocked a brow.

Ron nodded.

"How can-...? _Legally_ awkward?" He shook his head; "That doesn't even make sense!"  
"We all have something you know," Ron said defensively. Draco cocked a brow again.  
"Yeah, you... write in codes..., and I...say the word legal. It's normal to have something weird about you like that."  
Draco pinched the bridge of his nose and shook his head. Ron... knew he wasn't making sense. But at least he got the other's mind off of dead people and other lost causes.  
"What other weird things do you have?" The blonde asked after a moment of silence.  
Ron shrugged; "Harry Potter is my best mate?"  
"That sounds bitter?"

Ron nodded.

Again, it was quiet for a while. And it was obvious Draco was expecting Ron to elaborate.

"It's always about him. He can't really help it you know, but it is. Everything is about him, because the Dark Lord wants to kill him so Hermione helps him out and I get to come along because that's what friends do. ...I tried to dump them once, but my parents didn't agree. And they would have come 'round ours anyway for the holidays so there's no avoiding them. Harry's all right you know but the shit that surrounds him just... I'm part of it and I hate it. Because there's Harry Potter Superhero, Hermione Granger the amazing sidekick and... Ronald Weasley, the guy who's on drugs because he can't take a bit of stress."

"You're on drugs?"

"Oh-! No, no- I take pills, er- antidepressants. Not... I don't know. Illegal drugs. These are prescribed. Look;" he got the bottle from his pocket and showed it to Draco. "These prevent me from going berserk."

Draco took the bottle and read the label; "My mother used to take these," he said as he handed it back to Ron. "A few years ago, she-..."  
"Did she get better?" Ron interrupted him hopefully.  
"No, she kept mixing them with alcohol... so she had to chose between them."  
Draco's tone had a certain subtle urgency in it, and Ron nodded understandingly; "Yeah... I remember when I was last at your place, she was drunk and you were blackmailing her, right?"  
"I wasn't blackmailing her,-"  
"You were! You were because she Silenced you and then got you to your room, and Dobby then let mum and me out. It was really bizarre."  
"If you say so," Draco rolled his eyes. "So you're on pills because you're in Potter's team."  
Ron shook his head; "No I was taking them before I met Harry actually... But he didn't help."  
Draco sat differently, his back against the side of a desk and his side against the wall. He was now directly looking at Ron's side.  
"Potter never helped."

Ron looked at him – was this when Draco would be Malfoy?

"If it wasn't for him, none of this nonsense would be happening."

Yes it was.

"That's not fair you know. He can't help some freak tried to kill him when he was a baby."

Draco shrugged; "Perhaps not, but yet it would be better without him. See; Dumbledore is keeping Harry Potter, The Boy Who Lived and the only desired victim of the greatest maniac of all times IN A SCHOOL full of innocent children." He sat more upright as he spoke, and Ron half expected him to count things off on his fingers again. He was wrong this time though; "If Potter would have died as a child, the Dark Lord wouldn't have been stripped of his power, wouldn't have wanted revenge as he regained it... Cra-... a Death Eater told me that if it wasn't for Potter, the Dark Lord would have only changed the admission requirements for Hogwarts to purify the wizarding world – basically just... not send children of half blood an acceptance letter. Then the purifying process would have been slower, but a lot more peaceful. There would be protests from the halfbloods, but it wouldn't be the mess it is now."

Ron sighed; "You can't just kill him though, that's-"

"Immoral? Of course it is. Getting thousands of people killed trying to defend him is all right though."

"That's not what I'm—..."

"It's the currently applied strategy. And you know what? It's complete and utter bullocks. I don't like killing people but when killing one saves thousands, I'd rather kill one. And if that one happens to be some brat I've been in class with then that's too bad. Eventually people will realize it was the only way out of this mess, and they'll thank me for it."

Ron opened his mouth to object but Draco didn't give him a chance; "Sure, things will be difficult for a while but my Mother will be all right, the Death Eaters will basically become some sort of defence army rather than... criminals, Hogwarts admission will be stricter, the Wizarding world will be pure, there will be no Muggles aware of our existence, and the world would be a whole lot simpler."

At a loss of words Ron just looked at Draco's hands – once again he was counting off the options on his fingers. He didn't seem aware of it at all.

It wasn't that Draco just got Ron's loyalty wavering – he was just trying to prevent himself from getting killed and keeping an eye on Draco's actions so he could interfere when needed. But he did see Draco's point now – and he did have a point. He had a damn good point. Ron's intuition was disagreeing, but his mind was persuaded.

**It had to be hours later.**  
Ron just woke up, his back sore from sitting against the wall and surprised to find Draco face down on the floor in front of him, hugging the vest of his school uniform under his head like a pillow.  
Vaguely he recalled what they had been talking about before.  
"I don't think izzat simple..." he mumbled as he lay down beside the other, curling up in foetal position with his back against the wall. Draco didn't respond.

**When Ron later woke up again, the first thing he was aware of was his forehead laying on Draco's vest as well**. Then he started to realize their foreheads were also touching.  
Suddenly there was the most blissful feeling in Ron's private area, from all the way down there 'till all the way up his abdomen and chest, almost touching his shoulder. It took him a few seconds to realize the sensation was caused by the Slytherin moving his arm.

Or attempting to, anyway.

"Hm..." it seemed the blonde was slightly roused by his arm being constricted, for he moved the same way again, may it be a bit more violently this time.

Ron couldn't help but moan – it was very clear now where that hand of Draco's was, and with that the way their entire bodies were positioned.

Draco was still laying on his stomach, but Ron was half on top of him. Somehow during his sleep he moved his arm over the other's back, one leg over the other's leg and his -business- exactly in the perfect J shape of Draco's thumb and index finger.

And damn.

He was hard.

There was nothing he wanted more that moment then to get off on that hand that was just too conveniently placed, but his common sense was screaming at him not to.  
Just when he started trying to move off the other the grey eyes fluttered open, drilling right into his blue ones.  
He opened his mouth to mutter something -an apology?- but just as he did Draco shifted so their lips stroked over each other. He had to admit that wasn't entirely accidental.

Without a second thought Draco leaned in, locking his lips into Ron's. The blue eyes he was looking into closed, opened in something like surprise or fear and then closed again.

Quickly his hand orientated itself, and when he realized just where it was he put it flat on the ground, doing something like a push up to get the other off of him. The kiss broke for almost a second, only because Ron needed time to get his back on the ground without hurting himself. Draco immediately planted his lips back where they belonged and then crawled on top of the other.

He would have stopped... probably... if Ron wasn't answering the kiss and accompanying it with something like a moan.

He crawled up, sat up on top of the other, and broke the kiss for a second to see where the top button of Ron's blouse was. He was still wearing his vest though – Ron kissed him and managed to lean on his elbows so Draco could get the vest off.

It felt amazingly good to know that there were only a few layers of cloth separating his erection from someone's sleep warm skin, and that feeling combined with kissing was distracting him from taking that vest off entirely. The ginger underneath him had to stop the kiss and grin sheepishly to remind him.

The vest was still on Ron's arms when Draco kissed him again, making him fall back to the ground and allowing the vest to pretty much tie his arms together.

When Draco was done unbuttoning the other's blouse he stroked his hands over the other's abdomen to make the cloth fall to the sides, exposing the freckled skin with erect peach coloured nipples. He stroked his hands over them, and grinned when the other attempted to thrust upwards in response. Draco could tell the boy tried to speak, so he shook his head and leaned in to kiss him on the mouth again.

The comfortable drowsy sleep warmth was steadily becoming hot and lust filled so he rushed to unbutton his own blouse, not even looking up when this made his wand clatter from his pocket to the floor.

"F-...eh," Ron tried, making a half arsed attempt to free his arms. In response Draco got up to his feet, kicked off his shoes and placed one of his feet on Ron's chest to keep him down.  
He then slid off his blouse, tossed it aside and opened his belt.  
He almost hurt himself as he moved his pants down over his erection... but this was an emergency situation! Standing up like this did wake him up, and he had to consciously prevent himself from thinking through his actions.

When he shifted most of his weight to the foot on Ron's chest he drew a dull "hmph" from him. Thankfully he managed to get his pants off without falling over or breaking Ron's ribs and he sat down on top of him again, his legs pinning Ron's arms to his side even more than his vest was already doing.  
The ginger gasped like a fish for a kiss but Draco refused and instead leaned back, opening Ron's pants behind his back without looking.  
"Ffffuuuuuck,...Ng-!"  
Draco could hear Ron was kicking his feet and it was also hard to miss the occasional thrusts, for it all made it more difficult for him to open those cursed pants.

"...Alohomora," he mumbled when he managed to open the fly.

Suddenly Ron was struck with inspiration, and he attempted something like a sit-up with Draco sitting on his abdomen. He didn't manage to sit up, but he did draw a grunt from Draco and managed to make him scoot back slightly. "No no-... get off me, come-" Ron muttered, earning himself a surprised and slightly confused look. "I'm tied up, okay? ...Kinky bitch."

Draco's face flushed instantly and he got off Ron, actually looking timid. He sat on his knees beside Ron now, and watched him sit up and free his arms.

"Don't call me that." Draco stated flatly, looking at him from a low angle.  
"You don't think tying people up is kinky?"  
"I'm not your _bitch_, Weasley."  
Ron snorted; "Don't get shy _now._" He rushed to take off his trousers and then practically dove on top of the other to kiss him.  
"...you listened to it though," Ron muttered in between kisses, adjusting himself between Draco's legs. His hands were low on Draco's waist, and they were aching to be in his own groin.

He dragged his kisses over the blonde's chin, jawline, neck, collar bone... and adjusted his legs so he could keep his urges patient without making them unbearable. "I didn't," Draco breathed, and Ron grinned when he felt hands tug his hair trying to pull him away – stopping when he took a cute pink nipple between his teeth.

Draco drew a sharp breath; "I didn't – just shut up."

Ron's hands were on Draco's hips now, feeling the material of his underwear. Another slurred kiss and he reached the blonde's navel with his mouth. He had to actually hold back not to chuckle when he noticed just how hard Draco was trying to push his head down further. He let his tongue go down further, then moved his head, licking Draco's erection through his underwear. A strained "Take it off-" was the only response he got.

A million tips Charlie had given him were flying through his head. Too bad not half of them seemed appropriate now – except maybe 'treat people the way you want to be treated', and 'don't do anything unexpected, you don't want to scar them for life'.

The thought of his brother giving head was slightly off-putting, especially when Ron remembered he was told this usually happened when he was in drag.

With some forced focus Ron then carefully moved Draco's underwear down, feeling nervous when he realized what he was about to do for the first time. He never expected his first properly sexual experience to be a boy's genitals in his mouth... especially not DRACO MALFOY's... and he was glad to find it was healthy nervousness (Charlie: "Only professionals aren't nervous") and not disgust that made him hesitate slightly.  
Ron wasn't sure where to put his hands ("as long as you keep touching them and you're good") and then carefully stroked his upper lip over the head of Draco's hard cock. The boy was pink and white entirely, as if he was made in heaven, but this part of him had some hints of purple and red that made him seem all the more vulnerable.

The moment of the touch Draco thrust up his hips, for which Ron was prepared as he pushed the hips down firmly.  
Ron glanced up; Draco's left hand was slowly stroking over the trail of kisses he left earlier.  
Always good to know you're appreciated... "Get on with it!"

Shocked by Draco's tone, Ron took the head between his lips. Strangely enough the sensation of having cock in his mouth didn't seem new to him even though it was – cursed Charlie with his detailed descriptions.

He stroked his tongue over the shaft, closing his eyes to not let anything distract him. Draco was hard to please – he didn't need anyone to tell him to know that, and he didn't want to fail.

Draco made an unidentifiable guttural sound and was breathing hard - ("The more sound they make, the happier they are. ...unless they yell at you to stop.")  
Draco wasn't being very loud... carefully Ron started to suck, unsure of how far he could go without going too far.  
Wait... what could possible be 'too far' at this point?  
The blonde moaned though, and there was some movement up there Ron wasn't seeing.

He sucked again, harder now, and was amused when he realized Draco was trying not to moan this time.

Encouraged by the increased frequency of the thrusts he sucked again, meanwhile sliding the other's cock deeper into his mouth. Then he licked it and moved it out again, making sure to stop when the edge of the head was touching the inside of his lips.  
Draco's legs were twitching restlessly, and considering his own groin was just below Draco's knee-... it sufficed to say he didn't mind.

Bloody Hell – giving head was hard work. Yeah – treat people the way you want to be treated-...

"Oh, come on come on- do that again, " Draco's torso seemed to turn to the right and Ron had to use more strength to keep those hips semi-steady. He complied though; he sucked and slid that cock into his mouth until it hit the back of his throat and then slid it out again. This time though he took it out of his mouth and licked the head.  
His eyes then opened – this wasn't too difficult any more. Now-... how much of a kinky bitch would Draco really be?  
Those legs of his were still moving, making it hard for Ron to think. ("Some guys like it when you put a finger up their ass... Not just us pretties, but guys in general.")

...why the hell not?

He stuck his own index finger into his mouth to get it wet, then -as a distraction- licked the shiny cock again.  
Precum also tasted as no surprise. The mental image of Draco trying _his_ was forcing Ron to grind his groin against Draco's leg to keep it 'on hold'. Then he slowly slid the wet finger from the side of Draco's cock down, over his balls, perineum... The boy seemed to know something was happening, because he was almost desperately trying to not thrust his hips. His legs were twitching though, and Ron felt like he had complete power over the other.

He could do whatever he wanted, and the blonde would just lay there moaning, twitching, and begging him to continue.

Heh.

He could get used to that.

Draco's breath was almost wheezing, and his right hip appeared to be quivering more strongly when Ron's wet finger approached its target.  
He looked up to see the blonde have one hand over his chest, the other clawing into the ground. When he realized Ron was looking up though he looked down, well aware of the not too pleasant look on his face. Just when he was about to say something to get the bloody ginger to continue he felt that tongue go over his cock again. He felt like he was falling inside of himself, the only sensations he was aware of being Ron's tongue now treating his balls right.

The much anticipated finger then found his asshole and he moaned as he felt it force its way in. There was a sharp pain for a moment but it disappeared almost immediately as Ron was now vigorously licking his cock. He knew he was moaning – he had to be, Ron's mouth was too full of cock to – this sound was his own and it was as if he was imagining the ceiling and whatever it was that happened to be in his line of sight-... this feeling was all that was real. Just when he was about to open his mouth to warn the other of his upcoming orgasm- … the school bell rang. The sound made him more than aware of that finger fucking his ass, and with a prolonged guttural moan he ejaculated in the boy's face.

He looked down, leaning on his elbows, just to see the other lick some of that cum from the corner of his mouth. Eye contact was loaded with tension, and he swallowed hard when that finger was taken from his ass.

After a second or two Ron sat up, and Draco reached down to pull up his underwear from his ankles.

Apparently surprised, Ron stroked the back of his hand over the corner of his mouth to find more cum on his hand.

Draco got his pants, put it on, and then sat on his knees to kiss Ron... and take the last traces of himself off the boy's face. Still on his knees he closed his pants, and then reached for his shirt.  
The ginger seemed dumbstruck- Draco didn't feel like thinking about it. He had never went to class feeling this relaxed before.  
Then he got up, got his wand, headed for the door, and then... "What the Hell do you think you're you doing?" Ron sounded frantic.

"Coming in time for class."

"B-...?"

Draco cocked a brow in response. Ron was sitting on the floor, wearing nothing but socks and tenting boxershorts.

"You-... Come back here." The way the 'command' was pronounced made it sound like he was begging; "You can't just walk away!"  
Draco grinned, and then indicated himself theatrically with his hands; "looks like I can."  
Ron looked up at Draco in disbelief. When the blonde didn't return and instead crossed his arms, he sighed and got his clothes. Damnit – he was still hard.  
When he got to his feet and looked down to close his belt, Draco was suddenly right in front of him and shoved him against the wall.  
"What?" Ron nearly shouted, glaring furiously at the smug face far too close to his.  
He could feel the anger fade when he realized there was a hand sneaking down his chest – abdomen - hands, and he let his arms hang downs limply.

The hand slid in his pants, and the pretty bitchy face locked lips with his the exact moment he felt fingertips touch the base of his cock.

He raised his hands to grab Draco, to make sure he wouldn't walk away again, but before he really could the blonde had already leaned his chest against to his, intensifying the kiss and closing his fingers around his cock.

It felt hot – comfortably hot, and much better than his own hand. He moaned in the kiss and opened his eyes to look up at the ceiling when Draco's thumb stroked over his cock, and moaned even harder when his grip became firmer.

Draco then slurred the kiss over Ron's jawline, scraped his teeth over his earlobe, and stroked his hand firmly but slowly all the way to the end. "Does that turn you on?" he whispered, lips still touching Ron's ear.  
"Hhha-," Ron managed, moving his head in a way that could be either a twitch or a nod,"y-yeah," he swallowed hard, then decided to hug Draco closer to him.  
Again, the blonde tensed up slightly but then relaxed more than before. "Good...,"

He felt the hand softly stroke back to the base of his cock, tighten, and then firmly stroke to the end again, this time applying slightly more pressure as it reached the end.

Again Ron moaned, this time hiding his face in the base of Draco's neck. Then he held him tighter against him. He moaned again when the hand repeated its actions, and tried to mute himself by kissing Draco's neck. When it didn't work because Draco's hand was just too fucking divine he sucked down on the skin, trying to focus his attention on it so he wouldn't come too bloody fast. He wanted him to go on forever.

When his arousal – and with that his _need_- increased, Draco's hand kept the same pace, firmly but slowly stroking to the end, and then softly back to base. With a smooching sound his mouth released Draco's neck- "F-faster..." To add urgency to his plea he tried to thrust his hips forward, but Draco seemed to ignore him entirely. His forehead was leaning against the wall, his face was aimed down, and when he realized there were eyes on him he looked up at the ceiling instead.

The second bell rang, indicating classes had started.

"We're late," Draco said to the ceiling, his hand continuing its job steadily. It was truly unbearable to feel that hand jerk him off so... coldly... but so thoroughly, too.  
His arousal was building regardless, and he felt it wasn't going to be much longer until he came.

Too bad it kind of...  
sucked.

Despite his hard breathing, he decided to say something about it. "Fucking Hell Draco... it's like you're jerking off a stranger," - Draco didn't reply - "Do you mind acting like you care for a second?"  
Instantly the stroking stopped, and his body missed it because he could almost feel the ghost of the memory of it continue.  
It didn't mind though – his full attention was drawn to Draco's thumb over the head of his cock, stroking over it from one side to the other. His eyes shut instantly – it was too intense, it almost hurt- and then let go.

Ron felt Draco's hand move up and he let go of him, ending the hug. Draco was looking right into his eyes now, and licked his index finger slowly.  
He almost grinned, then did it again.  
Before Ron could utter whatever it was he was thinking Draco kissed him.

He felt his hand tangle in his hair, pulling their faces closer together, and that tongue exploring his mouth intensely.  
He held his hands up defensively, but before he found a place to put them he felt that wet finger where he wanted it. Stroking the head of his cock, harder than he wanted it but not intense enough.  
"Hwf-aah" he didn't know what he was trying to say, and it didn't matter. Within a second the nail of that wonderfully wet finger stroked sharply over the slit on his head. Where. It. Remained. It didn't push but it was _there_, and Ron's own movements were the only thing making the feeling just intense enough for him to almost cringe at it.  
When Draco then hid his face in his neck and kissed him – sucked the skin right below his ear- he was surprised by his own orgasm. He wrapped his arms around Draco again, who was standing still as a statue until Ron's moans faded.

Then he cast a quick '_Scorgify_', after which Ron got dressed. Together they went to their first class that day.

**Professor Snape gave them both an inquisitive look, and cocked a brow when he saw the purple mark in Draco's neck. He narrowed his eyes slightly at Draco, who sanctimoniously sat down next to Pansy.**  
"Twenty points from Gryffindor for mister Weasley-..."  
"Wha-?" Ron was gobsmacked. He was only a few steps behind Draco, why didn't Slytherin lose any points?  
"...-for school uniform deficits."

Ron hurriedly sat down next to Hermione, who did not at all seem pleased. "What's wrong with my uniform?" he hissed quietly at her, meanwhile dragging her book closer to him because he forgot his own.  
"...your vest is inside out," Hermione snapped back at him in response.  
In amazement Ron looked over at Draco, who was allowing Pansy to knot his green tie. When the blonde spotted his glance he winked at him, after which he focussed back on Pansy.  
"He wasn't even wearing his tie!" Ron hissed at her, still amazed by Snape's unfairness. "Well it's not about the vest, is it." Hermione snapped, pulling her book back to her and looking into it angrily.  
Harry snickered and allowed Ron to look into his book; "Does he have it?" he asked, a certain spark in his eyes Ron couldn't quite place. "Wha-?"  
"The Mark, does he have the Mark?" Harry whispered, giving a 'meaningful look'.  
Slightly overwhelmed, Ron sighed and shook his head.

Draco whispered something in response to Pansy, and Daphne Greengrass was leaning in on them and giggling.  
Abruptly Snape turned to face the three of them, and they looked up at him questioningly and innocently, the way only a Slytherin could look at Snape.  
"Mister Malfoy, that your pathetic excuse of a girlfriend doesn't care where you have _really_ been, doesn't mean the rest of us aren't giddy with curiosity."  
The class had been silent before, but now it was dead quiet.  
Snape had never picked on Draco before, and this definitely didn't seem benign.

Draco's face flushed, reason enough for most of Gryffindor to feel victorious. "I had a little... _job_... to do," Draco said after a second. "Maybe if you ask him nicely he'll let you do it, too. Sir." His attempt to safe his ego seemed decent, even though Ron felt panic build.  
"WHAT ARE YOU INSINUATING?" Ron suddenly shouted, surprising himself with the sound of his voice. He was leaning his hands on his desk and his face felt strangely pale.

"He is referring to the fellatio you performed on him, Mister Weasley."

The entire class was dead silent now, amazed by Snape's dull tone on the matter.  
"What you do is between you two, but I do not approve of it disrupting the class like it has. Another slip like that, and neither of you will be permitted in my class any more."

Snape's eyes turned to Ron, who felt strangely faint. "Seat yourself. ...I don't care if it hurts."  
Ron nodded, and felt like the was moving around him.  
"Professor, " Draco said, clearing his throat as if he was genuinely about to cry. Ron didn't think anybody else would recognize that sound.  
"This is... more than inappropriate..."  
Snape turned to him now, smiling unpleasantly. "Is it really, mister Malfoy..? Perhaps you should tell your Father about it, see if he has a word on the matter."  
Draco, too, slumped back in his chair, feeling as if someone just stabbed him in the stomach.  
"He will professor!" Daphne snapped at Snape, but she went completely ignored.  
Gods, Ron hated Snape.


	9. Chapter 9: Slytherin pals

**HELLO! Yeah it's been a while. Apologies are due! Sort of. Last month was Harry's birthday! Because we do not celebrate this it seemed appropriate to skip this erm... occasion, and just move on after the masses had calmed down again. So here it is, chapter nine of Stains! We hope you enjoy, the drama is soon to commence!  
That night Ron had a terrible dream. **He was facing Draco who was looking his way, but his eyes didn't seem to hit target. It was like he was looking right through him.

Ron made a grimace trying to provoke him, but when he got no response he opened his mouth to say something. To Ron's surprise though Draco raised a hand, demanding silence.  
Then he suddenly smiled -grinned actually, making Ron feel like he was facing the devil.

„I know what you have done,"

Ron cringed when he noticed Draco's voice strangely sounded a lot like Snape's.

„I haven't done anything," Ron replied, his voice high-pitched and full of awe. Was he about to cry? He swallowed hard and took a step back. Draco sounding like Snape didn't really comfort him.

Draco shook his head and sighed.  
„Oh Michael...you have no idea,"  
„Michael?"

Draco nodded as a reply and came a few steps closer. His grin widened, revealing...blue teeth?  
What kind of weird dream was this?  
Ron tried to signal Draco that he didn't actually want to be here...that he didn't want to talk to him now and that everything was probably a terrible misunderstanding but when he tried to,... there was no sound coming from his lips.

Desperately he tried to force his voice out; he should be screaming now but there was still no sound. And Draco was grinning even wider.  
Suddenly...;„Ron?"  
Ron awoke with a start, his clothes drenched in sweat. Seamus, Harry, Neville and Dean were standing around his bed, darting confused looks at him. „Are you all right mate?" Neville asked carefully, scrunching up his nose.

„Yeah...sure...I am..." Ron gasped, „What's going on?"  
„You've been shouting some serious stuff man..." Harry replied, stroking his hand over Ron's shoulder.  
„Fucking dose, eh?" Seamus added.  
„Oh shut it paddy!" Ron hissed, not knowing why he was being so harsh to Seamus. He didn't actually care though.  
„What did I shout?" Ron then asked, looking at Neville. He didn't want to look at Harry to avoid further-...

He took Harry's hand and pushed it away softly.

„You were hysterical! Shouting that your name wasn't Michael and that you'd like to leave and that you couldn't stand the grin on their face. We figured we should wake you up before you'd go sleeprunning,"  
„On whose face?"  
„How would we know? It was your dream Ron," Dean replied, cocking his brows. „You know what? I'm off to bed again...it's barely five hours 'till class..."

**When Ron entered the Great Hall most eyes were on him.** People were also whispering and even though Ron didn't appreciate it, he decided to shrug it off.

When he passed a few Slytherins on his way to the Gryffindor table, he suddenly felt a hand squeeze his shoulder to stop him. It was Blaise Zabini, looking at him curiously.  
„Good morning, Weasley," he said in a mocking voice and bared his teeth. Gobsmacked, Ron mumbled a "morning" before he shook off Zabini's hand and moved on.

What the hell was that about?

Ron kept on walking towards his place until a short girl, more than a head shorter than he was, jumped out in front of him, waving with her hands as if he wouldn't have noticed her.  
Daphne Greengrass, the only semi-Hufflepuff Slytherin on Earth, was blocking his way and when he tried to go by she moved along with him to block his way again.  
„Hello Ron," she said, looking at him with eager eyes.  
„Hey..." Ron replied and cleared his throat. He could feel people were looking.  
„You know I've been wondering if you would like to meet up later...I mean- not in the Slytherin Common Room of course because you are not allowed in there.-"  
Daphne paused for a moment and her eyes twitched strangely.  
Just when Ron wanted to ask her if she didn't feel well, she continued: „We could meet up in the library if you want to and then go outside. Oh no...it's raining, that's not good but we could meet in the library and then go-..." She wrinkled her nose and sighed. „What do you think?"

Seriously... Ron bit his lip. What was he supposed to say? And why were Slytherins swarming over him today anyway?

„He's gay," Vincent Crabbe then said, leaning over from his place and one hand aiming for Daphne's butt. She didn't even notice he was talking to her.  
Ron wasn't sure if he should warn her or not but before he got the chance to it was too late. She squeaked and giggled and then slapped Crabbe's hand a way.  
„But we're not you know," Crabbe then added and nodded towards Goyle who had been watching the situation.  
„Are you sure?" Daphne replied with her a high pitched voice, making Crabbe and Goyle suddenly look like complete idiots.  
„Of course...we are not gay..."  
„Hehe..."  
„Hehe? What is that supposed to mean?" Goyle asked and eyed Daphne suspiciously. „We are not gay...we are-"  
Ron decided it was better for him to sneak away before Daphne could hold him up even more. He walked by, and when he considered himself on a safe distance he heard the high pitched voice again; „At four! I'll be in the library then!"

Sure.  
Why not.

When Ron finally sat down right next to Harry, he sighed audibly.

„You enjoy being friends with them?" Harry asked with an indifferent voice. He didn't look up from his plate.  
Ron didn't look at him either when he replied „They are not my friends,"  
Because they _weren't_ his friends. Not even Mal-Draco was his friend. They just... got on very well.

„Why not?" Hermione asked, sitting opposite to Ron and now looking up from her Transfiguration book. „You are Draco's boyfriend, surely you can be friends with his friends."

Bloody hell. Why was everyone being so legally annoying today? Ron gave another sigh ere he took a toast and some scrambled eggs. He wasn't really hungry but he knew he'd be later in class if he didn't have some breakfast now.

„You know... just because I am his boyfriend doesn't mean I gotta love his mates," Ron snapped back, picking at his food. Just when he decided he wouldn't be able to force himself to take a bite the owls arrived, dropping post in front of their owners. Ron was hoping he wouldn't-...

Two letters had fallen right in front of him, one straight into his scrambled eggs.

Hesitantly, Ron took the letter that wasn't dripping with food and his heart skipped when he saw it came from Charlie.

_Little Brother,_

_Finally!_

_Draco Malfoy, hm?_

_Does mum know about you and your blonde catch already? She hasn't written to me yet so I thought it might be clever to just not tell her to prevent any drama. Wanna know how I heard? Liviu (he's a friend of mine) told me. He's got friends whose family have kids in going to Hogwarts and since you and Draco gave a glorious performance you totally got them to writing their family a letter telling about the two of you.  
Now looky here, you are such a pretty boy. Congratulations, bro. I'm proud of you!  
I want a details, got it?_

_-Charlie_

Ron couldn't help himself but smile when he folded the letter again and put it aside. Charlie knew. That was good. Ron would have told him anyway.

All though, Ron didn't really like to be called 'pretty'...

That was Charlie's way to talk about gay men... and Ron certainly wasn't one of them. And no matter how much Charlie wanted him to; Ron definitely wasn't going to give him any details. He knew he could tell his brother _anything,_ but this... It just didn't feel right. He was fine with the fact that Charlie used to tell him everything about his sex life but that didn't mean he had to return the favour.

Still smiling, Ron took the second letter and opened it. Immediately he frowned. It was letter from his mother.

_Dear Ron,_

_I miss hearing from you. How are you? Ginny told me that you have a boyfriend; Draco Malfoy. _

(Ron darted an angry glance at his sister.)

_Why haven't you told me? I know I've been negligent as a mother towards you lately but that doesn't mean that I don't care. I'd love to hear from you._

_I love you._

Bloody hell. Ron had expected her to ask embarrassing questions, or to make him feel bad about his relationship with Draco but he would have never imagined she'd be so... nice to him. He didn't know his mother like that and the thought of it made him feel queasy. For a second Ron was expecting Fred and George to jump up and tell him they fooled him but it didn't happen. Not even Ginny said a word. She wasn't even looking at him. What the hell?

Ron looked around nervously, checking if anyone might have noticed the awkward letter.  
„Hey, what's the matter?" Harry suddenly asked and eyed Ron curiously. „What's that? A letter from home?"

Harry took Charlie's letter and opened it. Usually Ron would have taken it back immediately, asking Harry what in Merlin's name he was doing with his mail, but he didn't care now. He was still gobsmacked by his mother's words.  
'I love you', she had written. She had never written that before. Never told him she'd love to hear from him. And for as far as he could recall this had to be one of the few letters that was not asking about Harry's well-being.

„You are...pretty?" Harry looked at Ron in surprise-... no; in _shock,_ and his brows were furrowed in a nearly impossible angle. Ron nodded; „Yeah...uhm..."

Suddenly he realized he'd never told Harry about Charlie being a drag queen. Or told anyone else, for that matter. There had been far more important things going on and since Harry and Hermione never really had been interested in what Ron had to say (or they considered it rubbish) he had never told them. They didn't even know Ron and Charlie were so close. That Charlie had always been his favourite brother. It'd been Charlie to teach him how to read and write... occasionally assisted by Bill, but most of the time Charlie.

Draco Malfoy was the only one who knew.  
...which kind of started to bother Ron.  
Yet something deep inside of him refused to let him tell Harry about it.  
„He must have been drunk or something..." he replied.

It wasn't denial that had made Ron say that. He simply didn't want to tell Harry. Not now anyway.

Harry sort of scoffed and snorted in one as a response. „Who's that letter from then?" He pointed the letter Ron was holding so close.  
„My mother..."  
„Oh...tell her the cake she sent last week was awesome," Harry responded and smiled. „She makes the best cakes ever!" His voice sounded childish for a moment, then he added: „Are you all right?"  
Ron nodded. „Yeah...I am,"  
„Good! You know... I thought we could... play some chess later. After class,"  
Ron's eyes grew wide. „You want to play chess with me...?" he said, looking at Harry with amazement.  
„Well... I never said I hated it you know... " Harry's hand moved slowly up to Ron's arm, softly starting to stroke it. Ron gulped. He shifted his weight uncomfortably.  
„I'm not too sure about that...Daphne asked if I could...come to the library later and I said I'd think about it and...she is really nice you know..."  
Harry pouted. „Daphne...? She's a Slytherin..."  
„So is my boyfriend!" Ron hissed and his hand instantly chipped Harry's hand off his arm.

„Oh right! I forgot. You prefer spending your spare time with one of those bastards instead with your _friends_. Traitor," Harry snapped back and got up. „See you later, Ronald," Harry nodded towards Hermione and indicated her to follow him. She darted a quick glance at Ron before she joined Harry.  
Ron sighed. He noticed that Ginny was now looking at him.  
„What?" he spat, and gave her a provocative glare. Ginny looked back down silently.  
Gods, why were people being so annoying today?

**Today's lessons had been terrible so far.** As usual. Ron didn't like it. Especially not since Snape had embarrassed him in front of the entire class. Surely Draco didn't feel any better, but that didn't offer any consolation.

He was in Transfiguration now, the final lesson of the day and there were a few minutes to go until the bell would ring.  
They were writing down some pointless answers to pointless questions, and there was some mumbling here and there.  
Suddenly; "So...you sucked the Slytherin snake?" Seamus asked, loud enough for everyone to hear it „Didn't know you were into boys..."  
Everybody was quiet for a second, and McGonagall didn't seem to be sure what to do yet.

„WonWon...how could you do this to me?" Seamus continued after a second. Then, in a sing-song voice; „WonWon, why aren't you giving me a kiss? ….Won Won, why are you into dicks?"

_Finally_ McGonagall decided to interfere; "MISTER FINNIGAN, this lesson is meant to expand your knowledge of Transfiguration, please save the gossip for the Common Room. That is, after I told you what to do for detention. We do not tolerate such language in Hogwarts." Many students cocked a brow at her final remark, but everyone did look back into their books.

„Ignore him," Hermione said softly, trying to calm Ron whose face resembled a tomato more than anything. Thankfully Lavender also contributed to Finnigan finally shutting his yap;

„At least I don't look like a monkey, Finnigan" she stated softly but sharply, her voice dead serious and terrifying.

Ron was on his way to the library now and people still looked at him in a funny way. Instinctively he quickened his pace until he found himself running through the corridors. A part of him told him to slow down and try not to make a fool himself, the other part insisting on reaching the library as soon as possible.

When he had reached the library Ron had lost his wind. Panting he walked through, passing ancient works that didn't interest him a single bit. He was looking for Daphne. She said she'd be waiting for him after class, didn't she?

When he was just passing the Modern History section he heard soft sobbing. Ron followed the sound; someone was obviously crying. His heart made a jump when he found Hermione in an otherwise abandoned corner, books spread out across the table, but instead of reading them she had buried her face in her hands. The sight of it made Ron feel awkward.

„Mione...?" he asked softly, trying not to startle her. He failed though, and as she jumped up she immediately wiped away her tears. „Oh hi Ron..." she said once she realized who it was, a forced smile on her face „You're here to meet Daphne?" Ron could only imagine what she was _really_ saying since her voice broke right after she said the other girl's name.

„Uhm..." He shrugged nervously.

„I-I-I'm glad you're happy..." Hermione stuttered, sobbing and trying to hide her face in her hands again.

Oh gods.  
No.

The first thing that came to mind was the day before school had started again... What it had supposed to mean when she had buried her face in his neck, giggling and softly stroking his cheek... when her lips had come so close to his own... Aw crap; and now she thought he was with Lavender, Draco _and_ Daphne? Basically... Everybody but her?

„Are you all right...?"

What kind of shit question was that? Ah well, he asked it now.  
Hermione nodded slightly.  
„I am," she stuttered and kept on nodding. Ron noticed that her bushy hair didn't seem so bushy now...It was drooping, like a plant that needed water.  
Her hair being such a mess made her look even sadder than her facial expression did.  
Ron sighed and sat down beside her. Then he flung one arm around her and said: „What's the matter? You know you can tell me."

Hermione gave an incomprehensible reply that reminded him of a gagging cat. He sighed slightly and pulled Hermione closer. „Don't cry, okay?" he tried but when her sobbing worsened he added: „Right...calm down... It's probably... no big deal at all and er... things are... a bit weird but, they'll be fine soon and then you'll wonder what you've been crying about. 'Kay?"

When Hermione calmed down a bit she kept refusing to look at Ron. Her eyes wandered over the books to distract herself.  
After a minute or two she cleared her throat and said: „So...you and Draco, hm?" To Ron's surprise she smiled. „I would have never thought you were actually...homosexual,"  
He cocked a brow.  
„I'm not...I'm...erm..." He remembered Draco's words. „...I am bisexual. That's different."  
A nervous laugh escaped him and he added; „Never thought I'd be that though,"  
„Bisexual..." she mumbled and her voice sounded normal again -as if she was about to do some research.  
It was surprising that she had recovered so quickly... Ah well, must have been a mood swing.

Just when Ron was about to reply to Hermione's mumbling, the sound of books falling over startled the both of them. Someone had set off a domino.

Madam Pince hissed angrily but audibly; „Miss Greengrass, be careful with those!"  
„Uh...I'm...sorry... I wasn't even-... let me help you."

Hermione gave Ron a bemused look. "She's waiting for you then?"  
He nodded, wondering whether this was funny or not.

Another two or three books thudded on the floor.

„_Don'_t! touch them!" madam Pince snapped. "I'm sorry, perhaps if I-" Daphne said apologetically. "No! No, no- you're not going to do anything. You're going to sit down here and read- _carefully_."

Ron and Hermione caught a glimpse of madam Pince escorting Daphne to a seat, both hands on Daphne's shoulder blades.

„I heard she wasn't the brightest-..." Hermione started with a grin.  
„...I guess that must be about right." Ron sighed in response, before looking at her and smiling. Maybe their friendship wasn't over yet.  
„So...you are Draco's boyfriend now?"

It seemed like Ron had been asked the very same question all day now. Was it some form of torture people intended to submit him to?

„Yeah... very much in love..." Ron sighed. They were sitting at the table madam Pince chose for Daphne, and he could tell the librarian was keeping her eyes on them. Daphne was laying half on the table; her head was resting on her arms. Ron preferred sitting upright... just to underline the difference between them.

„When did it happen?"  
„Hm?"  
Daphne giggled. „Well... when did you fall for him?"  
For a moment Ron wasn't sure what to reply. Then; „A few months ago...I...fancied him for quite a while...and...er...yeah...it just happened then. We met up...and...yeah..."

He felt incredibly awkward saying that... but what else was he supposed to say?

„What is it like?" Daphne asked, probably blinking more than she needed to. She stretched and then lay on the table again like she did before.  
With no particular interest, Ron asked; „...what you mean?"  
„To be in love?"  
„It's...nice you know... feels really good," If this was going to get any more awkward, Ron was just going to get up and leave.  
„I thought so," Daphne squeaked and put on a way too big grin. Despite that, she still was quite beautiful.  
„So... you've got a boyfriend...or..?"

„Me?" Daphne's eyes grew wide, „Oh no...no...I-...well... I used to think I had a crush on Pansy actually?" Ron's eyes widened. "But now I know she's just my best friend. Hm... I used to have a crush on Marcus Flint? But that didn't work out, he was dating this... what's her name? Christa? Yeah so that didn't work... But no boyfriend, no. Not yet; we'll see. Can't be single forever, can I? That'd be lonely I think, I'd rather have a load of cats than be alone later. Or a dog, that'd be good. Dogs are more like men than cats are don't you think? Though I'd settle for a hamster." She nodded as if someone just gave her good advice, and Ron looked at her in amazement."Yeah I think I'd go for a... a hamster, see I always start off with amazingly big plans and end up with less than a fraction of them, so- Oh wow, can you imagine?" she sat upright and looked into Ron's enthusiastically."If I now plan to have a hamster, I'll probably end up with the-... half an amoebae on... On the fleas on a hamster! See- less than a fraction?" She nodded enthusiastically and then lay back down on the table, but changed her mind, straightened her hair, and then leaned her face on a hand. She left the other hand where it was, and looked at Ron in a way that made him think he was supposed to say something.

So he just... nodded understandingly.

„What are your hobbies, Ron?" Daphne then asked suddenly. Was that a girl's thing? To change topics within seconds?  
„Erm... I like... chess," Ron answered, blushing slightly. Now she'd probably think he was a boring geek. His family have never been too impressed with it; Charlie was the only one who ever encouraged him in it.  
„Chess?" Daphne cocked a brow and cleared her throat. „That's cool- I don't know much about it though, I just know that-" She pointed a stain on the table, „-if that was the black queen and...-" She used her other index finger to oppose the stain, „-and this the white king..." She frowned for a moment, „Then...the king would be ...dead?"

Ron looked at her in amazement for a moment. ...Daphne wasn't done yet though; "Or no! Wait wait wait-..." She squinted, eyes focussed on Ron- "if... the black guys are always the bad guys right? And you're supposed to take the... The queen? The white queen, and the white king is supposed to defend. Right? And he can enslave all the black p-"  
„Yeah-,...uhm... close, you're close, but... ...you need a chessboard to explain this correctly," Ron said quickly, hoping to shut her up before it got any more awkward.  
"No! No, because Draco told me this is how it works, and he showed it to me with a chessboard." She nodded again, this time as if she was trying to convince him.

"...right."

"Can't argue with your boyfriend!" she stated happily, leaning back and crossing her arms as she put a foot on the edge of the table to look at her heel.  
He didn't know what else to talk about with her. He didn't even know her, and now she seemed to be acting like they were friends... It was just too awkward.

„Uhm...sorry...but...I still got to do some homework..." Ron started carefully, hoping Daphne wouldn't be too offended by him leaving her so suddenly.

She looked up from her heel and gave him a slightly confused look. Then it seemed to strike her and she smiled; „Ya, sure! That's okay. See you around, Ron!" She waved in the most girly was possible, and Ron didn't know how quickly to get away from her.

**Too bad he didn't manage to, since Daphne kept him up another half hour as she talked to him about her favourite classes, teachers, and anything else she managed to twist the topic to. ** Ron never knew a person could talk so much about so little. She was worse than Hermione- or even Lavender! He felt like he'd suffered through a Quidditch training for at least three hours whilst dying of the flue, not talking to a Slytherin girl for thirty minutes.

When Ron entered the Gryffindor common room he found his friends sitting on one of the sofas. When they saw him approach they immediately stopped talking. Harry looked at Ron quietly and nodded towards the chequerboard where he found a letter waiting for him.

„It's from Malfoy. He wants to meet you tonight." Harry then said, his voice sounding restrained.

„You opened my mail?"  
„...yeah..."  
„Why?" Ron darted a provocative look at Harry.  
„Because you're my friend, Ron, and I worry about you. We _all_ do."  
Hermione and Ginny looked uncomfortable with the situation.

Ron felt anger rise up to his face. He noticed they had just walked in opposite directions, eyes focussed in each other's, resembling two male predators in a struggle for dominance.  
„I thought it came from your mother, that's why..." Harry said, his voice still sounding strained.

„He didn't mean to...the letter was half opened when it arrived..." Hermione tried, breaking the tension and changing it into a general heavy feeling rather than the aggressive electric tension it was before.  
Ron could have shouted at her now. But when he opened his mouth he remembered that it had been barely two hours since she had been sitting in the library all by herself, crying.

He swallowed his words and took the letter.

_„Meet me at seven in the Room of Requirement."_

Ron was dead on time when he opened the door to the Room of Requirements and he was surprised to find Draco sitting on a comfortable-looking sofa. It had a cream-coloured cover that looked like leather.

„Hey..." Ron mumbled shyly and sat down next to the boy.  
„Hello," the blonde replied indifferently.  
„Well?"  
„I thought we could talk a bit," Draco said, cracking his fingers as he sat more comfortably, turning his face to Ron.  
„About the plan?"  
Draco sighed. „Oh Weasley..."

**„You have...what?"**  
„I swear Haneen was hot as fuck but she was more interested in Bill so I got drunk with Charlie and we went to a gay club in Cairo and... I dunno... we ended up in front of the Pyramid of Cheops... Mum was pretty angry when she found out though..."  
„A gay club? You've been in a... gay club?"

Draco seemed shocked. Which amused Ron. „Yeah, take it you haven't? You'd rather go to the 'opera'?" he chuckled. It wasn't like he was a regular at any gay club, but it was fun to make the blonde uncomfortable.

„Hm..."Draco started, clearly trying to distance himself from the topic. "-it's late. I should go now."  
„What time is it?" Ron asked, a bit disappointed that Draco wanted to go.  
„It's past midnight," Draco said in a flat tone as he got up and straightened his clothes.  
„Oh wow..." Ron gave a sigh. „Well then...yeah..."

There was silence between them for a moment, and it was slightly awkward.

But just when Draco took a step to leave, Ron grabbed his wrist.

Draco was surprised but allowed Ron to pull him down again, so he was now sitting with one leg over Ron's. Before he knew what was happening the ginger had pulled him close and was holding him, and the smell of his shampoo made its way into his brain. Unsure of what to do he tried to scoot and get more comfortable, but before he really had a chance to he felt their lips lock and his mind drift off. His dry lips were scraping over Ron's soft ones and it worried him only until his lips parted and he could feel Ron's tongue over them. He reached around the other now, held him, and answered the kiss.

It quickly grew wilder and more intense, and before Draco knew what he was doing he was straddling the other. His cheeks flushed when he noticed and the other smiling up at him did not help in the slightest.  
„Pink is definitely your colour you know," Ron said, poking Draco's belly with a finger. Draco tried to respond, but his mouth moved without a sound. "It really does," Ron added, poking him a few more times.

Suddenly Draco slapped Ron's hand away. „I'm not a child!"

It was clear Draco was angry; his entire face seemed 'hard' and dark, and his eyes had flared up and were now narrowed and threatening.

„Uhs-... S-sorry..." Ron responded, putting and end to the poking and raising both hands as if he surrendered; „I didn't mean to-..."

Draco interrupted him with a scoff and skidded back a bit before getting on his feet.

It was as if nothing at all had happened between them, and Ron was simply facing The Bully again. „Right..." Ron got up and clicked his tongue, annoyed by his semi-hard member that was not going to find the release it desired tonight. „I should be going now... talk to you tomorrow or so...maybe..."

Draco had his arms crossed now, and was staring at the wall at their side.

Ron looked at him curiously, and after a few seconds Draco finally responded. „I'll talk to you soon"  
„O-kay then...yeah...," Ron nodded, unsure of himself. Then he got an idea. Quickly and carefully he leaned in to peck Draco on the cheek, amazed he wasn't swatted away. With a faint sense of achievement he left the room.


	10. Chapter 10: I broke the silence

**HELLO PEOPLE DO YOU REMEMBER US? We remember you. :D Melanie has been lazy lately... or actually insanely busy and demotivated, hence the delay. SORRY! Since we're going to meet again over Christmas though, Melanie thought it was a good idea to get some chapters up before then, so you have something to do while we're rocking Germany. Enjoy!**

**Words like violence**  
Break the silence  
Come crashing in  
Into my little world  
Painful to me  
Pierce right through me  
Can't you understand  
Oh my little girl

All I ever wanted  
All I ever needed  
Is here in my arms  
Words are very unnecessary  
They can only do harm

Vows are spoken  
To be broken  
Feelings are intense  
Words are trivial  
Pleasures remain  
So does the pain  
Words are meaningless  
And forgettable

All I ever wanted  
All I ever needed  
Is here in my arms  
Words are very unnecessary  
They can only do harm

'Enjoy the silence' by Depeche mode

**Fuck.**  
What the hell had he been thinking?  
Ron was on his way to the Gryffindor common room now, pondering about what happened minutes ago.  
The snogging.  
...with Draco.

It wasn't like they hadn't kissed before... This had just been different. So... wanted.

„Damn it..." Ron mumbled to himself, rushing through the dark corridors of Hogwarts.  
When he reached the portrait of the Fat Lady, he was glad that he hadn't been spotted by stupid Ms Norris or a teacher.

The common room was empty now - except for Crookshanks lurking in the dark, illustrating his not-appreciating Ron's presence with a hiss.

„Oh, shut it stupid animal!" Ron hissed back and hurried to the boys' dorm. He moved cautiously, hoping he wouldn't wake any of the others. The plain thought of Harry's impeaching voice made him shiver.  
Fortunately though, it seemed none of the other boys noticed his return. Ron took off his shirt, as well as pants and socks. He left the boxers on though; he really couldn't be bothered to slip into his pyjamas now.  
Laying in his bed, what happened before came back to him. He had kissed Malfoy. No-Draco!  
He had _intentionally_ kissed Draco.

How could it have felt so good?

He got up, flustered; this time he didn't care if anyone could hear him. He needed to release some pressure from his pants.

**Breakfast had been uneventful although Ron wondered where Harry and Hermione were.** When Ron had woken up this morning the boys except Neville had already been gone. He'd spent breakfast alone then, which was all right since he hadn't felt like talking. Harry would have probably asked annoying and intimate questions anyway and Hermione...she would have reprimanded Ron for not having finished his homework.

And now he was attending Defence Against the Dark Arts.

„Mr Weasley, would you like to present us with your amazing insights on self defence in underage wizards?"  
Merlin. That wasn't a question. Snape never asked for what he wanted.  
„Uhm...no?"  
Snape cocked a brow. Silence. Then; „Ten points from Gryffindor,"  
„What?" The word left Ron's mouth before he realised it wanted out. So had the following; „You can't do that!"

More silence, and Snape looked at him in the sort of contempt people have when looking at annoying babies. He took a few big, thoughtful steps towards Ron's table.

Ron swallowed and shook his head.  
„Apparently," Snape replied, „I can." The man cocked his head up, his eyes drilling Ron's self-esteem through the floor and below. „Present us with your homework."  
„No homework, sir," the Ron replied bravely without averting his gaze. He was seething inside, he hadn't forgotten about how much Snape had managed to denigrate him in front of the class before.  
Snape's eyes darkened. His voice, however, still had the same piercing equanimity when he said; „I expect you to be present here this Saturday evening, seven o' clock, Mr Weasley,"

Shit, that was tomorrow! From the corner of his eyes Ron noticed that Draco had covered his face with his palms. It pissed him off.  
„Saturday then..." Ron replied with a sigh, averting his eyes from Snape.  
He felt his blood was starting to boil. The fact that Draco did absolutely nothing was just-... he was his boyfriend, wasn't he! Wasn't he supposed to do something!

„Sir!" Harry suddenly said, his voice loud and provocative.  
Snape pursed his lips.  
„I think it's not fair." The Slytherin half of the classroom was amazed and amused.  
„Harry, what are you-..." Hermione hissed at him but he grinned at her so strangely her objections disappeared into oblivion.

„I will complain about your teaching methods, sir," Harry said, and his lips formed a cheeky grin. „I am pretty sure the headmaster will not...-"  
„_Apparently _mister Weasley is not the only one to have detention tomorrow at seven." Snape said, then turned on his heel and went back to the front of the classroom.  
Harry's face fell.

People were collectively amazed at Ron's responses to Snape. Oh well.

„At least we will be together. Detention is only half as bad then," Harry chuckled when they were making their way to the Great Hall after that awful lesson.  
Ron sighed. „Yeah... excellent," he responded in an not overly enthused tone.  
In fact, the worst thing about the upcoming detention was that Harry was going to join him.  
„I think it's going to be fine. We could talk. Haven't done that for a while, right?"  
„We are talking right now..." Ron mumbled slowly and slightly depressed, when suddenly a blonde boy passed them by as if he was in a hurry.

Ron's attention was captured by him, it took him a while to realize who that was…  
„Hey!" He said the word as if it surprised himself, "Malfoy! Draco... _Draco!_ Wait a moment!"

He ignored Harry and ran after the boy until he could grab his arm. Draco cringed at Ron's grasp, then turned around.

„What is it?" he asked indifferently, managing to avoid Ron's attempt to lock eyes with him.  
„You could have helped me you know," Ron said but couldn't help himself and smile. He didn't know what exactly made him smile though.  
He looked at Draco curiously and expected an answer.

Draco just continued to look at him indifferently.  
„Hey...did you hear me? You could have-"  
"No, I couldn't have." Draco responded flatly. He narrowed his eyes then, briefly, making him seem evil.  
Ron was confused; „...are you alright?"  
Draco's face straightened out, and he cocked a brow.

„Are you angry with me..?" The more Ron said to Draco, the more insecure he felt. What was going on with the blonde?  
Silence.  
Ron felt a pang of disappointment; Draco _was_ angry with him. Sadly, he nodded his head and was just about to turn around and go back to his _friend,_ when Draco responded.  
„I am not angry with you," the blonde said softly, his eyes focused on Ron awkwardly. „Uhm, okay," Ron replied with lack of something better.  
The tension between them was loaded with awkwardness. They had been kissing after all.  
…and even though Ron didn't consider it before, this awkwardness made Ron think Draco might not have enjoyed the kiss as much as he had.

_Not_ like he was actually in love with Draco.  
Not. At. All.  
Being in love with Malfoy was ridiculous, the thought of it made Ron's stomach feel weird. This was just show. Nothing else. Kissing can be nice no matter who you do it with.

„Right, so-..." Ron began but was interrupted by Draco; „I'll let you know when we'll next meet," he said dryly and gave Ron a brief glance. Their eyes locked for only a second, and that was all it took for Ron to notice that Draco's eyes were glittering.  
„Are you sure you are alright?" he asked carefully.  
„Yes." And with that, Draco Malfoy left the scene.

„What was that?"  
Harry was standing right behind Ron, which he hadn't noticed before. That was probably the reason why Draco had not been too talkative. „I've been talking to my boyfriend," he responded.  
„He wasn't too happy, was he?"  
„What's it to you?" Ron snapped.  
Harry shook his head. „Oh Ron..." He put an arm around him and grinned.  
„C'mon ...let's go to have some lunch. I'm hungry! And so are you."  
He playfully punched Ron's shoulder;. „C'mon, we've got something to celebrate!"

**T****he celebration Harry had mentioned before was in honour of** how well he managed to get detention together with Ron, and how Draco would probably have never done something like that for him. Also, it consisted of nothing but bragging, whining and ranting.  
„I think he's a coward!" Harry said, his mouth still half full with fries, „He should have done something. If you're dating someone, the _least _thing you can do is stand up for them."

Ron just focussed on his food, even though he wasn't hungry. Harry was right. Draco hadn't tried to help him. And the conversation they had after class hadn't been too great either.

Suddenly the realisation dawned in on him, drowned him and made him grab the edge of the table for balance:  
Malfoy was using him.  
In the background of his thoughts he could hear Harry continue; „There's just no way that Malfoy's up to something _good._ That, and there's this Muggle saying; Good mates buy you out of jail, but your _best_ mates go down with you and say 'we've fucked up'. " Harry nodded full of conviction, but Hermione glared at him; "_Language_, Harry!"

Ron's thoughts were more salient to him though; After all, over all these years Malfoy and him had not exchanged a single pleasant word. What had made him believe Draco could become his friend again?  
He knew he had been a complete idiot about it. And he knew he had to take his pills before the next class.  
With a suppressed sigh Ron got up, mumbled something about going to the bathroom, and left the Great Hall.

**When Ron entered the boy's dorm he found a ****mean-looking eagle owl sitting on his night stand, **a small letter tied to its leg.  
Ron took the letter and then got a piece of chocolate for the animal. „Pig likes chocolate. I don't know if you...?"  
The owl looked at the candy with contempt, and then flew away.  
Ron sighed and unfolded the letter.  
„_Tonight, 8:30. ROR. "_

„**You are late," Draco said when Ron arrived breathle****ssly in the Room of Requirement.**  
„I know...Harry wouldn't let me go,"

"At least that part of the plan is working," Draco stated dryly.

Apparently Ron interpreted it as sarcasm, for he sighed deeply and started making up excuses; "It's not like him and I are such great friends! It's just – in _first_ year, mum wanted me to get to know him and I stuck with him because I wanted to know what would happen! Because he was so famous and all! And he seemed all right at first, but when he told me about the showdown with Quirell I was _done_ with it! I didn't want to be his partner in whatever he'd do?"  
Draco just looked at Ron, wondering where this was going as he sat down in the loveseat.  
"Second year Ginny was involved, I had to do _something_, she's my sister! I couldn't just sit around and have Harry solve it! And as if that wasn't enough; third year my rat was evil! Fourth year I tried to end it, -with Harry I mean. But then my parents went nuts and they guilt tripped me back into being his mate."  
The ginger inhaled through his nose as if he was crying, even though he wasn't. Draco was listening with interest, his arms crossed and his eyes on the other boy.  
"Fifth year...my father was involved. I'm sure you heard about that." The rant appeared to be coming to an end now, "...and Harry saved my dad's life. As a thank-you I joined him on his trip to the bloody ministry."

Ron sighed, and Draco sat more comfortably.

"And sixth year...well, here we are, right? I saved a Death Eater from drowning and I'm about to betray the amazing Harry Potter."  
Draco smiled slightly at the end of that rant, and kept that facial expression when Ron started to blush. He seemed to be about to say something, but Draco didn't let him; „You sound like you're his boyfriend rather than his friend."  
"I'm NOT! He gets on my nerves, he's just Harry bloody Potter, and he's okay but that's _it_." Ron calmed down, breathing rapidly and shallowly.

"Breathe deeply, all right?" Draco said, keeping his tone neutral. "It's ridiculous your parents insist on you being friends with Potter just because they need a hobby. You should just-..." Draco didn't expect Ron to interrupt him there though; „I want them to be proud of me."

That line, however insignificant... It hurt to hear it. Did Ron even KNOW how much Draco wanted to make his parents proud? Did he have the faintest idea what he had already done to try to achieve that? He hardly knew the meaning of the word, did he? 'Pride'..., what was that to a Weasley? A _blood traitor_?  
As Draco thought this though, he felt guilty. He knew, deep down, that blood meant nothing. It were actions that determined who you are... though a name does help. Ron couldn't help his name was Weasley.

"It's a silly way to go about it," he finally said, swallowing awkwardly.

Ron then sat down on the sofa, that was placed in a 90 degree angle from the chair.  
„So, what's next?"  
Draco straightened his back and got the letter from his pocket, thankful for the change of topic. „I received a reply from my aunt,"  
„Great..."  
Draco narrowed his eyes at Ron briefly because of that response. Then he shook his head slightly before continuing; „Sunday afternoon,"  
„Hm..." Ron nodded. „Wait-... _this_ Sunday afternoon?"  
„Yes," Draco confirmed, feeling nervousness jitter through his stomach. Things would be all right again after Sunday.

Ron took a deep breath and nodded. „Right. When?"  
„ Sunday." Draco said again, slightly confused now.  
„When on Sunday?" Ron asked slowly and looked at Draco curiously.  
„Oh..." Draco mumbled, feeling blood rush to his face. „At three in the afternoon."  
He cleared his throat slightly, then continued so he could regain his equanimity; "You get Potter here, we get him in the cabinet, and I'll join him there." Then he sought eye contact with Ron, who was looking down at the floor.

An awkward silence commenced and lingered for at least a minute.

Ron cleared his throat.  
Draco cocked a brow.  
Ron muttered something.  
"Louder," Draco commanded, and felt his nerves nearly give in when the other repeated his words; "...aren't you just... using me?"  
Ron slowly looked up at him, and he felt his face had to have the colour of a cherry by now.

"W-..." How was he supposed to respond to that? His mouth had frozen into the 'w' he just said, and he searched his mind for the right response.  
Thankfully, that didn't take long. "Of course I am." He stated, proud that he sort of kept his cool; "In a way I am, after all; if I wouldn't have a life debt with you, we wouldn't be sitting here right now." He allowed a second to have that sink in. "... and you're using me, too, because you want to get away from Potter. But doesn't everybody use each other? In the end you live for yourself alone, and the only reason you say certain people matter is because they make you happy." He swallowed – that little rant had sounded awfully gay. "So yes. I'm using you. I'm using everybody. And so are you." He winked at the end of that, and wondered what the other was thinking.

Ron scoffed in an airy way, a not-happy smile on his face.  
"It will be over soon," Draco stated in a neutral tone, trying to comfort himself more than the other.

Ron was trying to process what Draco had just told him. It sounded reasonable, didn't it? Actually, it sounded obvious. He felt silly for not thinking of the life debt to begin with. But what was he to Draco?  
Suddenly his thoughts were interrupted by Draco making a popping sound with his lips. He looked at him in confusion.  
"... I broke the silence." The blonde clarified, a pretty smile on his face. And with that, Ron knew what Draco meant to him.

"Come here?" Ron softly said, nearly begged, feeling incredibly insecure. Draco raised his brows but got up and approached him. Slowly Ron looked up, feeling his face flush and feeling as if the world was disappearing around them. He was faintly aware of the Room of Requirement creating mistletoe above their heads though, and even though there was no way Draco could see that, he did lean in when Ron raised his hands to his waist.

**Ron could feel Draco's heartbeat be lovely out of sync with the breathing in his neck**. Their bodies were attached now, and Ron found it slightly awkward but amazing to have someone that close to him. _Around_ him. They kissed again, lazily, and then Draco's head lay down again, face hidden in Ron's neck.  
Ron's hands stroked over the blonde's back, softly and carefully.  
It had been amazing. Never in his life had he felt this awkward and plump and yet so desirable and beautiful. Never in his life did he have someone so fragile and beautiful and strong so close to him. ...and never in his life did he think someone's dirty bits could feel so good.  
„I thought it was really nice with you," he whispered into Draco's hair. He couldn't help but smile, he was so relaxed.  
Draco didn't respond at all. He wasn't even trying. His head was still resting on Ron's shoulder and his breathing continued slowly and deeply.  
Handsome little Death Eater boy was sleeping.

**The next day was ****uneventful,** and Ron was taking a trip down memory lane for hours now. The first thing he'd thought of this morning had been Draco and how they had kissed. How they had touched each other. The sounds they made, the way it made him feel-... the thought of it had aroused him incredibly. Usually, the first thing Ron thought of in the mornings was lunch.

When he had seen Draco in the Great Hall then he had smiled at the boy, and not even the fact that Draco hadn't responded had lowered his mood.

Ron was sure that things were getting better after tomorrow. Harry would be gone and perhaps he and Draco could-...  
„Ron; We should get going, it's almost seven!" Harry's voice –unfortunately- was hard to miss. "Don't want Snape to get mad at us... come on," it was incredible how enthused the Boy-Who-Lived was.  
Ron sighed; „Right..."

He got up and followed Harry out of the Gryffindor Common Room. The hallways were already empty, most students seemed to have locked themselves up in their common rooms. After a long and nearly awkward walk, Harry and Ron arrived at Snape's office and Harry knocked the door.  
The door swung open silently, and Harry made a face at Ron with mock-fear. Ron gave a half-arsed smile, and hoped Harry'd keep his yap shut during the upcoming hours.

Snape hardly bothered to look at them as people, and instead nodded at the table further on in the room. Two chairs, facing Snape, were placed at it, a new roll of parchment on top of it. The boys sat down, Ron choosing the space closest to the wall.

„You will write an essay about Appropriate Behaviour in Class, focussing on the following three questions;" Snape sat more upright as he spoke, looking scary, "One, how does one prepare for class. Two, what is the function of a professor, and how does one behave accordingly in the presence of one. And finally...; how do students behave in the absence of their professor." Snape used his usual strange intonation as he spoke, making him sound like one big joke in Ron's ears. This entire essay was a joke... which apparently was legible on his face;  
„_Unless_ either of you prefer being mister Filch's assistant for a week, I suggest you start. writing." Snape added, looking into Ron's eyes. „Any questions?"  
„No, sir," Harry and Ron replied in sync, though Harry sounded more enthused than Ron. It was almost scary.  
„I shall return in 95 minutes, by when I expect you to have finished your papers," Snape said, before briskly getting up and leaving the room.

„...Right." Harry looked at Ron, and it seemed like his eyes were scanning him. Ron probably would have felt more comfortable if Snape was still with them.  
„I've been doing some thinking," Harry continued, his eyes wandering over Ron's face. „About you, Malfoy, me, and... things."  
Ron frowned. „What do you mean?"  
„See, we've been best mates since first year, right?" Harry said seriously before clearing his throat, "...and I thought we agreed that Malfoy was a devious bastard. So why you would suddenly become friends with him, neglect us, date him... You know, what's going on?"

Ron sighed and tried to stay calm. Harry was trying to annoy him.  
„...'cause I love him." Ron responded without hesitation. "If you knew what that was like you wouldn't be asking stupid questions." He nodded at the parchment insecurely; "Just-... write your essay."

"You don't even want to talk to me anymore, do you?" Harry asked, sounding genuinely hurt.

Ron might not consider Harry a real friend, he didn't hate him, either. And knowing he was the reason he was now hurt didn't seem right. In an attempt to fix the situation, he carefully said "...it's just not your business, okay?"  
Apparently, that was not the right thing to say. „Actually, it_ is_ my business!" Harry snapped in response. „You are my _best mate_, and Malfoy is a Death Eater! Someone AGAINST me being ALIVE! And you're _DATING_ him! How is that _not_ my business?"

Ron was seriously getting angry now. ...mainly because Harry was right.  
"He's _not_ a Death Eater!" he hissed in response.

„Right, then he's not! So what if he's not _officially_ a Death Eater?" Harry gave Ron a challenging look. "Maybe his _task_ is to make me lose my best friend, so I'm alone and miserable and an easy victim – because who knows, he might go for Hermione next," he finished bitterly.  
Ron felt miserable. He wanted his pill. "No,... I don't think he would-..."  
"Do you _really_ know him, Ron?" Harry interrupted him.

„We're in the middle of a _war_, and he's risking his life by being with you... there is just no way that that is genuine." Harry sounded worried more than anything, and he put his hand on Ron's shoulder, "He's not brave enough to risk that... the Sorting Hat didn't have to think about sorting him at all, remember?" He tried to catch Ron's glance, but Ron was staring right through him. "But there's a plan," he croaked in response, realizing instantly he was messing up. Betraying Draco, like he expected. He felt terrible.

„No need to cry," Harry was whispering now. He patted Ron's shoulder and then wrapped the arm around him instead.

„Now..." Harry began and took a deep breath. "...what plan are you talking about...? Ron just wanted to cry. As loud as possible. He wanted to hide in a corner and cry until there were no tears left. He betrayed Harry, and now he was betraying Draco... the one he had come to love. And as he started to reveal the details of Draco's plans to Harry, he knew Harry would never fully trust him anymore either. A feeling of forlornness seized him when he realized he, Ron Weasley, was a shit friend. For anyone.


	11. Chapter 11: Draco's demise

**Oh dear, sweet betrayal... Ron must feel like shit right now.  
Just so you know, this chapter contains an M+ scene. **

**Mother!**  
You're holding my heart screaming  
Mother!  
You left me broken, bleeding  
Son of!  
The man you loved and left for  
The son of a bitch!  
That tried to show me death's door

Everything's illuminated  
Everything is dedicated  
Tried to leave this life I hated  
Even death was overrated

Love song for the dear departed  
Head stone for the broken hearted  
Arms to kill  
Or flowers to steal  
Head trip for the mortal earthbound  
One sip of the blood that I found  
Laying here  
I'm dying here

As in!  
Obituaries rain down  
And suddenly  
We're laying naked face down

Wasn't it decapitated?  
Can't you see me fascinated?  
Never know run up to damage  
Even that could be be mismanaged

Love song for the dear departed  
Head stone for the broken hearted  
Arms to kill  
Or flowers to steal  
Head trip for the mortal earthbound  
One sip of the blood that I found  
Laying here  
I'm dying here

Don't bring me daffodils  
Bring a Bouquet of Pills  
See some geranium  
Cracked to the cranium  
Protect me when I can  
Respect me when I am  
Dying

Love song for the dear departed  
Head stone for the broken hearted  
Arms to kill  
More flowers to steal  
Head trip for the mortal earthbound  
One sip of the blood that I found  
Laying here  
I'm dying here  
Love song for the dear departed  
Head stone for the broken hearted  
Arms to kill  
Or flowers to steal  
Head trip for the mortal earthbound  
One sip of the blood that I found  
Laying here  
I'm dying here

'Love song' by Korn

**The Vanishing Cabinet was strangely warm inside.**  
It felt strangely claustrophobic, and Draco was actually in it _alone_. Panic was starting to fade and he was still reaching for the doors, hearing by the sound of his fingers on the wood that these weren't held shut any more.  
No point in stalling now… With a deep breath he pushed the doors open.  
It was so bright outside of it Draco had to shut his eyes tightly. There were black silhouettes nearby, but he didn't particularly fancy finding out who they were.  
"Where's Potter?" That was aunt Bellatrix' voice. Draco had to force himself to open his eyes even slightly.  
"He's not here," Draco said before swallowing.  
He heard something like a scoff from a man at his left, and managed his eyes to open fully. He never realized how dark the Room of Requirement really was, especially compared to their own library.  
There were three Death Eaters in front of him casting shadows over him – a man he didn't know at his left, Bellatrix in the middle, and a man he thought was named McLaughlin at his right.  
Bellatrix didn't seem too happy. "You just killed your mummy boy," she snapped, using her wand to wipe her hair from her face angrily.  
The words didn't fully process, even though Draco knew what they meant. He nodded slightly.  
"Evans," Bellatrix said, and the man at the left turned and walked towards the wall. Draco could now see his mother stand against it, apparently petrified.  
No wait – she wasn't petrified. Not magically, anyway. She was shivering, and looking at Draco in a way that made realization dawn in on him.

"He's still there, I can go back and g-" "_Silence_!" Bellatrix shouted, her eyes opened wide and looking at him the way a predator looks at its prey.  
"H-here?" his Mother said, panic obvious in her voice. "Bella not here, please, not in front of him, don't-" "EVANS! KILL HER! THE DARK LORD SAID TO!" Bellatrix bellowed, stomping her foot. Her eyes were still on Draco.  
Draco felt his senses retreat inside of himself, and his tunnel vision found his mother looking at him. He could see tears glistering in her eyes. She was shaking her head, and her lips parted to speak; "I'm sor-"  
"_Avada kedavra_," Evans said, sounding as if he was explaining the curse to someone rather than using it to kill.

Narcissa could feel her body become limp, and before she hit the ground she could hear the word she was pronouncing turn into an oddly high moaned sigh. Was this it? Was it over now?

She could still see. She couldn't blink, but she could see. She could feel her heartbeat stopped, and she knew she wasn't breathing any more either. But she could see.

Bellatrix didn't seem pleased at all; she could see her pace away from her and then return, standing right in front of Draco. She could see their mid section and their heads, the ceiling, the books behind it... she had to strain herself to focus her fading attention on her sister and her son. She saw her slap him. She heard her yell. He looked pale – Draco. Draco looked pale. Please be all right darling. Mummy loves you. Always have, always will.

"Greyback!" Bella snapped. Narcissa could feel his footsteps come from behind her, pass her, and she could see the filth on his shoes and pants with unbelievable detail.

"Take care of him," her sister said, slapping Draco twice more. Greyback grunted.

Narcissa never thought the last conscious thought she would have as a person would be the memory of her trying to teach Fenrir Greyback how to read the day before.

Please let me stay. I need to see more. I need to see Molly. Molly Molly Molly

Don't let me fade.

Draco's tunnel vision was now somehow focused on Greyback, who said something to him. He wasn't sure what it was. He couldn't move regardless – his limbs just didn't cooperate. His gaze drifted from Greyback's talking mouth to his mother, laying on the floor with her eyes opened. A tear was resting on the inside of her nose, and she seemed to be looking at him. "I'm sorry." Those were the last words she said – she wanted to say. Why didn't these people have the decency to let her finish? She could have –... ONE MORE SYLLABLE and it would have been all right, they didn't even allow her to apologize? What kind of-... how unbelievably-...

"_SORRY_ won't bring her back Draco!" Bellatrix yelled, slapping him again. The sensation didn't process at all – the sound of it barely did. "_You_ disappointed the Dark Lord! Was this _teensy_ task so difficult? After ALL I've done for you?"

The only reason Draco knew Greyback took his arm and was guiding him away from Bellatrix was because of the smell of the man. Sweat and... something else. He couldn't place it.

"YOU KILLED CISSA DRACO! I'M NOT PLEASED!"

Bellatrix voice was ringing in his ears, and slowly he turned to the side. Evans was standing against the wall, looking up at him from a low angle. He didn't seem much older than Draco, he couldn't be 25 yet. Evans raised his chin, slowly, some of his dark blonde hair falling in his face. He had a ghostly expression – he didn't seem pleased. He seemed shocked, if anything.  
Draco wasn't aware he stopped walking until Greyback pinched him in the arm and dragged him along further.

Draco felt empty as Greyback guided him through his own house. He wouldn't have been able to find the way now, not in the state he was in.

"We were supposed to have a party tonight," Greyback said, still pulling him along by the arm.

"What went wrong?"  
Draco scolded himself for having trusted the Weasel.  
…he should have known, really. He should have known the Weasel would betray him, and Draco would be sent in the Vanishing Cabinet alone rather than with Potter.  
What on earth had made him think Ron could keep his yap shut to his 'best friend'?

"Well?"  
The only reason Draco knew Greyback yanked his arm was because his vision moved to the sides more than he intended to. Dimly he started to realize they were on the stairs now.  
"Where are we going?" he asked the step, turning his head in amazement to Greyback's foot landing on it. Suddenly the steps approached him quickly, stopping right in front of his face. Then they moved away under him, and when a filthy warm gloved hand grabbed him in the neck he could tell from his sore knee he must have just tripped.

"Get up. If you want me to carry you I'll have to kill you first."  
Draco managed to get his feet under him, and managed to walk the stairs with Greyback's hand in his neck.

It was as if that hand was the only thing keeping him awake.

They entered his bedroom, and Greyback closed the door behind him. The familiar sight of it combined with the smell of strangers wasn't right, and it was waking Draco up more.  
Slowly he became aware of the hand in his neck actually pinching him – had it been doing that the entire time?  
He was forced by it to walk towards his bathroom. Greyback opened the tap of the sink, and then forced Draco's head underneath it.

Draco gasped - the ice cold water did its job. He put his hands on the sides of the sink and tried to free himself, but Greyback's hand kept his head in place.  
"Let go!" Draco tried to free himself again, this time bumping his head painfully against the tap before Greyback pushed him back. When his frustration and shock made way for panic, Greyback let go.

Draco shook his head to get some off the cold water off of him, and then straightened his back to look in the mirror. He looked dreadfully pale, especially compared Greyback's filthy appearance. The scent of sweat seemed even stronger now, and he didn't want to know what other scents were coming from the man.

The man grinned at him through the mirror. Draco cocked a brow.  
"...do you ever shower?" Draco asked him, swallowing hard right afterwards. Anything was better than thinking of what just happened, even if it was arguing with this notorious pedophile...werewolf...murderer with terrifying eyes. It was that, or crying.

"You might die today," the werewolf replied matter-of-factly. "Narcissa was going to die if you failed anyway, but you took so long with it that people think your loyalty is wavering."  
Draco's eyes grew wide, and Greyback grinned widely before inhaling through his nose deeply. He was no longer looking into Draco's eyes through the mirror – he was now looking at his neck. Draco could feel his hairs stand on end. "If your note would have arrived any later they would have killed her, and killed you on arrival regardless of whether you succeeded or not."

"Th-that's not fair," Draco muttered, gripping the edges of the sink firmly and leaning on it. Greyback chuckled; "You're scared..." he inhaled deeply again, and grinned unpleasantly. Not like anything about him was pleasant at all, but this grin was particularly creepy. "...I can smell it on you."

Draco swallowed hard, feeling is heart pound in his throat.

"You're disposable to them."

Tunnel vision set in again.

"B-... I can move around freely in Hogwarts. Nobody else can." His own voice sounded like it came from far away. "It's very useful. If they kill me they will lose that."  
He faintly heard something metallic, and then something cloth like move behind him. His eyes were set on the drain of the sink, he didn't want to look away from it until the tears disappeared from them.  
He straightened his back in shock-response though when he noticed Greyback's hands had moved around him and were messing with his pants. "What are you doing?" he sought eye contact with the man through the mirror, but the man wasn't paying attention to it. He was smelling his neck - Draco could hear it right next to his ear.

The man's stench was unbelievably strong now Draco's back was forced against his torso, and he shuddered when he felt the man's pants were opened. Quickly he tried to stop the man's hands from opening his own pants, but he was too late. The bottom of the zip actually ripped and Draco would have fallen over at the force of the man's moves if he wasn't holding him close to him meanwhile.

Shocked by the violence Draco reached for his pants, trying to pull them up again. A big dirty hand was reaching in his groin though, painfully gripping him and he yelped. He tried to hit the hand away but it didn't give in the slightest bit.

The man's other hand then ripped off his underwear, hurting him as he did so and tossing the cloth half in the toilet.

Greyback's animal like pale blue eyes were looking at Draco through the mirror as he inhaled the scent of the blonde's neck again. Draco had no choice but to lean his hands on the sink – the monster was leaning on him heavily.

He was terrified and his mind was racing. '_When threatened by a shark, hit them between the eyes'_- useless. '_Please Drake, I want it so badly'_ - wrong thought. He should have let her if this was the alternative.

The filthy hand had filthy fingerless gloves on it, and it was cupping his ass painfully. "I th-thought you liked children," Draco managed, voice choking up in panic. "You're scared like a child..." Greyback grunted in response, gripping Draco's ass even more painfully.

The hand then let go and ripped off Draco's vest, and then blouse.  
Then it stroked over his throat, down over his chest and then joined the other hand in his groin.

"Maybe even... _more_ scared than a child... because you know what's going to happen..." Draco yelped when he felt filthy nails pinch his sac, and tears that came out of absolutely nowhere ran down his face when one of the hands cupped his entire manhood almost comfortably. "Please don't do this," he tried, yelping again when the other hand grabbed his hair and pulled him back. He was now fully naked apart from his pants on his ankles and his socks and shoes.

The hand in his hair forced him to turn around, and Draco did so as he reached for the sink for support.

The smell of sweat was unbearably nauseating despite circumstances, and Draco gagged. Before he could recollect himself the scent of it nearly diminished compared to the scent of the man's truly horrible breath. Draco opened his eyes, still gagging, but was surprised by the monster's lips covering half of his nose and his entire mouth. The disgustingly warm tongue stroked open his lips and forced its way in, stroking over his tongue and making the gagging even worse. The thought of vomit terrified him though, always had, and knowing he was gagging was scaring and disgusting him so much it was reinforcing itself. With all his might he tried to push the man away from him, but a solid wall would have given in more. The 'kiss' ended, and the man sniffed Draco's neck again.

The hand in his groin let go, and reached further between his legs before one of the fingers forced its way into his anus. He was still gagging though, and the hand in his hair didn't allow him a lot of space to move. Nor did being pinned to the square sink by this wall of a man. His head was pulled back and the disgusting stubbly face with the disgusting breath covered his nose and mouth again, tongue forcing entry once more. The man's erection was pressed against Draco's abdomen, and for some reason its size reminded him of a child's fist.

Then suddenly he was yanked away by his hair, nearly thrown on the ground. His shoulder hit the edge of the toilet painfully but Draco's primary concern was trying to pull his pants back on.

Greyback disagreed – after he calmly took his shirt off, he grabbed a hand full of Draco's pants and yanked them away, taking the shoes along as a side effect. The movement made Draco's head hit the wall, making him dizzy. The terrifying nausea still hadn't faded, and he tried to curl up for protection. Before he could though the man put a big heavy dirty shoe in the middle of his stomach. His intestines protested, and Draco wouldn't have been surprised if he was going to die now, being squashed like a bug.

Pressure increased and so did the pain, his intestines somehow feeling the way stones sounded when they were grinding against each other. "Please-" he tried breathlessly, _unable_ to breathe, unable to gag but still feeling sick. This was the first time he got to take a good look at the man, guffawing, leaning over him and waggling his brows. Draco used to think the man was tan, but the way he looked at it now it was just filth on his skin making him look darker. And those muscles – it was as if the man knew what he was looking at, because he flexed his hairy muscles almost mockingly.

"There we go..." the monster said, just when Draco thought he was going to black out. The foot was removed, and Draco gasped for the stinking air, gagging the moment he inhaled some.

He tried to curl up – it was as if he couldn't help but to curl up – crossing his arms over his abdomen protectively. He was looking at the floor and could see enough of it to catch the man's shoes in his line of sight. He was kicking off his shoes actually. And then taking off his pants.

Draco registered he must have pissed himself equally objectively, for his leg was laying in something hot and wet that wasn't there before.

When his ankle was grabbed a dull ringing appeared in his ears. It increased when he was dragged closer to the monster, through his own hot mess and into the stench.

It must have sat down on its knees, because Draco could feel something warm and solid under his behind and lower back – it must be its upper legs. No wait –now something warm, hot and flexible stroked over his anus, almost forcing its way inside. Limply Draco looked at the cream wall behind him, distinguishing enough in the reflection to know his ankle was being held up high and the monster was licking him.

Then he was moved. His thighs were now at either side of something warm and solid, probably its torso There was a particularly interesting spot high on the wall, close to the ceiling. It was really fascinating – Draco regretted he couldn't help but shut his eyes at the more than sharp pain when something big, solid, and filthy entered his behind. The filthy half gloved hands were now gripping his hips high, moving him back and forth as that _child's fist_ was tearing him apart inside.

The spot on the wall became difficult to see – everything did; Draco blinked his tears away. He could feel the _child's fist_ fill him up and occasionally hit a spot inside of him that was making him grow hard, but he didn't enjoy it the slightest.  
Slowly the realisation dawned in on him that he was laying in his own piss.

He was still feeling nauseous, even though he wasn't gagging any more. The ringing in his ears hadn't faded yet either and actually increased as he was pulled higher by his ankle, that was then placed on the monster's neck. "Keep it there," he commanded. Draco didn't see a reason to disobey.  
His other ankle was pulled away behind the monster, and it sat higher on his knees so Draco was only laying on the floor by his shoulder blades and on. The man's nails dug into his hips. Draco vomited in his mouth but swallowed it again. The panic it usually caused was just –... completely overruled by the ringing in his ears.

Its nails dug into skin and tore it, as the thrusting continued and increased in pace – something Draco wished he was oblivious to. It was hard to ignore it though, for it kept occasionally hitting that spot inside of him that could have been so nice.

His breathing increased temporarily when he ejaculated, shutting his eyes tightly at the sensation. It didn't really matter though – even if his eyes were opened he didn't see anything.

The monster seemed to become impatient, and he was grunting in sync with his thrusts. It seemed Draco's lack of response was disappointing him. That thought almost made Draco smile – nothing is worse than being ignored.

The monster's grunts increased at some point, and so did the intensity of the thrusts.  
When the _child's fist_ was pulled out of him and the monster let go of him dropping him to the floor, Draco felt the pain strike. Sharp, dull, hot, cold – everything at the same time. He didn't know if he was bleeding or it was the monster's cum dripping out of him.  
Almost in a reflex he curled up, desperately hoping for the numbness to return.

The monster got dressed, and it was Greyback again.

"Clean yourself up," he commanded without looking back, as he left the bathroom and then exited Draco's bedroom.

He sighed angrily when he returned some time later, finding Draco in the same position he left him in.  
"Get. Dressed." Greyback commanded. Draco's fingers twitched.  
His panic was buzzing in his throat chest and abdomen, even though the ringing had long faded.  
"Are they going to kill me?" he asked softly. He had to strain himself to prevent his voice from breaking.  
Greyback was obviously annoyed. "They want to talk to you. Get dressed."

When Draco still didn't respond Greyback opened the door to the shower cabinet and put the shower on. Then he grabbed Draco by the shoulder, dragged him to his feet and then threw him under the ice cold water.

Draco fell to the floor of the cabinet initially, unprepared to stand at all, let alone after being thrown. The temperature of the water made it impossible to breathe but when he realized that, he reached for the tap to make the water warmer. He sighed deeply when the temperature became comfortable, and then turned to find Greyback observe him curiously. "...you could use a shower too," Draco stated flatly.

Greyback crossed his arms and sighed; "Hurry."

Draco stroked his hair off his forehead, pouting at the pain in his behind. He was wobbling on his legs and had to lean his back against the wall to prevent himself from falling over. "You smell awful." It smelled awful in here. Of piss, blood, sex, and strangers. It didn't seem like it was his own bathroom at all.

"Just hurry." Greyback seemed to be about to leave the bathroom again.

"Your stench made me sick." Draco muttered, not sure exactly why he was still talking to this guy.  
Greyback glared at Draco angrily now: "Do you need help in there?"  
Confused, Draco nodded. "Yes. I need healing." He looked down, slightly amazed by how much his knees were bent towards each other. He tried to straighten his back then, but the pain in his behind was so bad he fell back to the floor of the shower and yelped.

He covered his face with his hands, pressing his eyes in an attempt not to cry. He was humiliated enough without tears running down his face, whether anybody could see them or not.  
Suddenly he was yanked to his feet by his hair again, and turned to face the wall. Again he yelped, but he was muted by being shoved face first into the wall.

Greyback must have healed him just now, because the pain in his behind quickly diminished.  
The pain in his hips, shoulders, head and stomach now reached the foreground, but Draco decided not to push his luck by asking the man to heal him more. He felt uncomfortable feeling Greyback's eyes in his neck but he chose to ignore it and quickly washed up -even washed out his mouth- before closing the tap.

Didn't this guy have any decency? Annoyed and intimidated Draco passed him to get a towel from the bathroom counter.

After he dried himself off he made sure to pass the guy without touching him - he just showered. Also he had to avoid stepping into the disgustingly coloured puddle on the floor. It stank.

Draco felt Greyback's eyes on him continuously as he got dressed, and he could smell the guy again when he re-entered the bathroom to find his wand and shoes.  
He cast a '_Scorgify_' on the yellow...red...brown puddle on the floor, and then with a flushed face rushed by the _Monster_ again to face his death.

**When Draco walked down the stairs, it felt as if the atmosphere increasingly became heavier.** The moment he was downstairs it was difficult to breathe.

"The Dark Lord could be here right now, Draco" Bellatrix snapped, walking by him and indicating with her wand he had to follow her. "He could be praising us, praising _you_, and we could be celebrating now." Draco followed her to the kitchen, and sat down when she pointed him a chair with her wand.

His mother usually sat there.

"How did you do it?" Bellatrix then asked, waving her wand in the general direction of Evans who then started making tea.  
"Do what?" Draco's hands were laying on the table, his left hand over his right. He was looking at them with more interest than he probably should.

"Fail." She walked behind him and then placed her hands on his shoulders, making him tense up. "What did you do?"  
Draco swallowed. When he was younger he used to write to his aunt, claiming his letters would keep her company during her stay in Asakaban or whatever he made of the name. She seemed a lot nicer on parchment.

Bellatrix' fingers dug into his shoulders. "I know mummy is dead Draco, but orders are orders and you _knew_ what the consequences would be. Now tell me how you failed or I will have to assume it was simply your incompetence... which would mean you can join Cissy on the library floor."

Draco inhaled deeply through his mouth, his mind racing. Somehow telling her the majority of his plan had been depending on _Weasley_ didn't seem like a good idea. When he took a breath to begin explaining, Bellatrix leaned her head on his left shoulder.

He hesitated for another second – not only because she made him nervous, but also because the thought of Ron just hurt.  
"I simply... persuaded him to come with me... in private, because I wanted to talk to him. He thought I was a Death Eater since the beginning of school, so he probably thought I was going to confess I was... I just... failed to push him into the Cabinet. Didn't expect him to-"  
"You pushed him?" She seemed surprised.  
"Yes, I figured... Well he was eyeing my wand, he'd be prepared for me to cast a spell... no way he'd expect me to shove him... Would have drawn too much attention to us, too. But he managed to grab me and turn us round so he could fall out of it, and-..." Draco swallowed, shocked by seeing the puddle of filth he scorgified on the inside of his eyelids when he blinked. "Here we are."

Bellatrix sighed, stared ahead for a second, and then stood up. "Get him some tea," she said to Evans before slapping Draco on the back of his head. Evans put a fine china cup of tea in front of Draco.

Mother's china.

"Draco,"  
Draco looked up at his aunt, who was now leaning her back and both hands against the kitchen counter.  
"Always rely on magic," she said as she nodded in an almost denigrating way. He nodded too.  
She nodded some more, then levitated the sugar bowl over to the table with her wand. Draco slowly shifted his gaze from her to the bowl. It belonged to the same set as the cup. White porcelain with a deep blue flower on each piece.  
Then he realized Bellatrix was making the spoon nearly fill his cup with sugar. Confused he looked up at her – "it's against the shock," she stated shortly.  
He looked down again, and he could see the top of the mountain of sugar stick out above the tea surface.

With a sigh he then took a sip, wondering how sweet the blood he would later piss would be.


	12. Chapter 12: Bad apple

**When will I see you again?**  
you left with no goodbye,  
not a single word was said  
no final kiss to seal anything  
I had no idea of the state we were in

I know I have a fickle heart and bitterness  
and a wondering eye  
and a heaviness in my head

but don't you remember  
don't you remember?  
the reason you loved me before,  
baby please remember me once more

when was the last time you thought of me?  
or have you completely erased me from your memories?  
cause I often think about where I happen to roam  
the more I do, the less I know

I know I have a fickle heart and bitterness  
and a wondering eye  
and a heaviness in my head

but don't you remember  
don't you remember?  
the reason you loved me before,  
baby please remember me once more  
ohhh

I gave you the space  
so you could breathe  
I kept my distance  
so you would be free  
I hope that you find the missing piece  
to bring you back to me

why don't you remember?  
don't you remember  
the reason you loved me before,  
baby please remember  
you used to love me  
when will I see you again

'Don't you remember' by Adele

**Ron had told Harry exactly what Malfoy had planned.** Ron was going to walk with him, talk to him, and lure him into the Room of Requirement somehow. Then Malfoy would appear, Ron and Malfoy would shove him into the Vanishing Cabinet, and then Malfoy and him together would go to Borgin and Burke's (or something; Ron wasn't sure).

Harry was offended.  
His best mate, his _first_ mate _ever_, had been persuaded by the person he hated more than anybody to betray him and send him right into the lion's den. ...but he couldn't be mad at him.

Not now, not like this; Ron was hyperventilating or something, leaning his fists against the door of the cabinet and breathing hard. It looked as if he was still preventing Malfoy from escaping from it.

"He's gone now," Harry tried awkwardly, and a choked sob rose from Ron. Of course! Ron was in love with that git!

When Harry remembered this, he placed a hand on Ron's shoulder for comfort. Ron turned around, red stains showing in his otherwise pale face. His chest was moving up and down rapidly, as if he was having some sort of local seizure.

"Have you taken your pills?" he asked gently, not at all prepared for the low grunt he got in response. "Hey? Ron? Have you taken your pills?" Harry tried a bit louder now, becoming worried. When he knew they were going in to get Malfoy, he hadn't been nervous. Just determined, really. But now Malfoy was disposed of and his mate seemed to be having some attack, he had no clue what to do!  
Quite suddenly Ron turned and vomited against the bottom of the cabinet. He leaned against it heavily, and Harry could hear the table behind it move and the items on it ring as they nearly fell over.

"We had sex on Friday," Ron mumbled, his face still focused on his vomit. Harry looked to the side awkwardly; what was it to him? "...oh...?" he managed, feeling slightly disgusted. He didn't have a problem with anyone's sexuality – in fact, he's had a homoerotic fantasy or two of his own - but the mental image of Ron and Malfoy exchanging body fluids was a bit too much.  
"He didn't need to do that," the boy continued in a strained voice, and Harry responded; "Nope, he really didn't." Involuntarily he shuddered.

Ron looked up at Harry then, tears in his eyes, the stains still in his face and some body fluid glistering in his nose and on his lower lip. He was quiet for a while and Harry just waited.  
"You said he would never be with me on his own accord, but he didn't need to sleep with me," Ron indeed continued, before stroking the back of his arm over his nose and mouth. His voice was shaking violently now.

More silence, and Ron's eyes were drilling into Harry's. It looked like he wanted to destroy him, and he wouldn't be surprised if he was genuinely boiling inside. "Well-," Harry tried after a while, "...at least he's gone now. We can-"

Hearing those words from Harry in that disgustingly hopeful tone just made something snap inside of Ron. "They would _kill_ his _mother_!" he shouted, not caring who could hear it. "His _father_ doesn't know about the plan, he'll think _Draco_ got her _killed_!" He paused to breathe heavily for a few seconds; "But _I_ did!"

Harry just looked at him stupidly, making Ron wonder if the other understood him at all. "Because of _me_, his _father, dumped_ him, his mother is now _dead_ and they might have killed _him_, too!" He was seething; "Because of _me_!" Then a pang of a strong sensation struck him at the bottom of his ribcage. An icy blue golden realisation.  
"Because of _you_..." he grunted, and the next thing he knew was his hand in Harry's hair, pulling his head up against the wall, and his hand pressing on Harry's throat.

His knees, his fists, his feet, even his tears of rage soon were all over Harry, along with Harry's blood. The Boy Who Lived didn't have a ghost of a chance.  
Time wasn't a factor at all – it seemed to be absent entirely. At some point, Harry was simply on the floor, bleeding and struggling to speak. He was hardly recognizable if it wasn't for his dark hair and the frame of his glasses.

"If you kill me-" Harry managed with difficulty, and the sound of his voice made Ron freeze, "You will be worse than Voldemort."

Ron stumbled backwards, far, far back, until his back hit the wall and he slid down against it, nearly in the same place Draco had sat before.

**Draco's stomach still hurt. **Actually, it seemed to gradually become worse.

He was just sat there at the kitchen table, on his mother's seat, occasionally picking up on Bellatrix delegating the other Death Eaters present.

People kept coming in and out, Bellatrix too entered and left, but Draco just stayed put. Nobody spoke to him, so he had nothing to say.

And his stomach still hurt. Remembering – or trying to even _think_ of what happened before was almost impossible with the pain he was in.

"Draco,"

His aunt saying his name snapped him back to the here and now

"You look sick."

She wasn't far off. The pain was so bad it made him nauseous. He was dimly aware he used to be terrified of the sensation, but right now all he could do was sense it. These weren't people whose limits you should push. Greyback had already healed his behind after tearing it open... Getting up to find somebody who didn't look entirely kill-happy was impossible because of the pain, and the people who were around him were engaged in passionate conversation constantly.

Bellatrix cocked a brow at Draco's lack of response. Sure, he lost his mother. A-boohoohoo. She lost her _sister_ and she was fine! Couldn't he just get up and make himself useful?

"Go upstairs," she commanded, pointing her wand at the ceiling loosely to indicate it for him. If he expected her to pity him, he must have severely misjudged her. She did enough to help him as it was.

She made him dispose of the little homo he was walking with _and_ made her Master accept him in his circles in one. That was more effort than the boy was worth.

"We're taking McLaughlin, Greyback and his men and maybe Evans so he can learn." she continued to Goyle.

"Not him?" the man indicated Draco with a nod of his head.

Bellatrix narrowed her eyes at her nephew still sitting there: "DRACO!" He seemed shocked, but still... pale. Sickly pale. He didn't even look that bad when he saw Cissy fall to the floor. "Go!"

With a flick of her wand she moved his chair back, and cocked her head to the side when the boy bent double in what seemed like pain.

"Playing mute?" She didn't have the patience for this nonsense - they were setting up a mission!

"Greyback hurt me..." the boy managed in a moan of pain. "Oooh... Ickle Drakie got hurt... Well - GET IT HEALED!"

When the boy just moaned, Bellatrix sighed impatiently and indicated him to Wimple with her head.

Then she turned back to Goyle, who glared at Draco. She waved her hand right in front of his eyes; "Yoohoo?" When Goyle had his eyes back on her she continued "...no. McLaughlin, Evans, and Greyback and his lot. His thugs can be a decoy so they'll be even easier to overtake."

There was a dull thud, a moan, and Wimple muttering "Holy-..." Immediately Goyle's attention shifted back from her to what was happening behind her.

Bellatrix placed her hands over her face, blew raspberry in her palms and then turned to see what was going on. Again she used her wand to stroke her hair from her face. If this boy was going to cause any more trouble, she was going to-...

That bruise in Draco's stomach was shaped and sized like Greyback's footprint.

"Oh, Drakiepoo... you let the dog walk over you?" she chuckled, shaking her head at the boy laying on the floor. Suddenly he reminded her of Cissy... dull eyes staring beyond her...

She snapped to Wimple "Fix him UP. STAIRS." Again she stroked her hair from her face. "There are too many corpses on the ground floor."

**Draco didn't open his eyes until the pain in his abdomen faded.** The trip back upstairs had been painful, but the pain had not become worse. It had just flared up occasionally. "It looks like you have some internal bleeding," Wimple muttered to him in an annoyed tone, poking his abdomen. It still hurt, but not nearly as much as before.

"Fuck – who knows more healing charms?" the man muttered. "How should I know?" Draco muttered back in an annoyed tone. In his experience he died four times over today, there really was no point in pretending to be nice.  
"You knew this one" he added in something like confusion.

"We can't exactly go to St. Mungo's. We have to look after ourselves." Draco didn't like the tone Wimple used... but he wasn't exactly in a position to object. "...Why am I in my parents' bedroom?" he then asked, eyes growing wide at the realisation. He immediately felt out of place – this was private territory! Not to mention it smelled of his mother's perfume in here.

A meaningful grin appeared on Wimple's face, that he desperately tried to hide when he realized Draco saw it. "Er- it's the most used bedroom." he stated in a tone that was somehow not convincing.

Fearful hesitant realization dawned in on Draco.

"Most... _used_-...?" Wimple tried, waggling his brows quickly before poking Draco in the stomach and making him yelp in pain. "Come on, it's... we're guys amongst each other, right?" He made a nervous head gesture towards the door, eyes on Draco who didn't get it.  
"Bellatrix is... well... I don't want a dominatrix..." He licked his lips. "And your mother... well... She required some persuading... But there's nothing a wand can't do." There was a sparkle in the man's green eyes that Draco wanted to knock out of them.

"Don't worry, she put up resistance... She might still tonight, I don't know, she does fight back but-" The man spoke quickly, he had the entire time, but it seemed more nervous now the topic was more to his liking.

"She's dead." Draco interrupted him.

"Wh-?"

Draco's tone was flat; "She's dead. Bellatrix made Evans cast the curse on her in the library earlier." Wimple's eyes grew wide.

"Find somebody to heal me." Draco stated equally flatly.

Slightly confused Wimple got off the bed and left the room.

Draco didn't like him.

Actually he didn't like any of the Death Eaters. Not like he expected any different, but it surprised him every time. How could these people be so... heartless? So brutal? He never thought of himself as a softy, but seeing how these people acted made him reconsider.

Right. What happened today? Betrayed by Weasley, saw his mother get murdered, got slapped repeatedly, got raped, stepped on, dragged through his own filth, then nearly fainted... and he was now going to die of an internal bleeding in his parents' bedroom, in which his mother was raped not too long ago.

...why the Hell not?

His Father didn't want him any more anyway. Who was there to bother for?

And that fucking Weasel betraying him... if he was going to live through this he was going to kick him in the face. Repeatedly. Until it was a bloody pulp.

Draco sighed and then stroked his hand over his abdomen. The purple bruising was gone but the area was still dark, and it still hurt. In his head something that was supposed to be his internal anatomy appeared, and he imagined Wimple healing his burst bowels and whatnot... Now all that was left to do was to get the spilled filth out of there. Or be killed by blood poisoning of course.

Much to his horror though, Fenrir Greyback was the first to enter the room since Wimple left.

His arms were crossed as he entered the room. When he was about two metres from the bed he sniffed, then jerked his head upwards. "You're hurt?"  
Draco would have rolled his eyes if he wasn't in such an unfortunate disposition – consisting of mentally preparing to die. He had to reply _something_ though, so; "You should know."

"...I know a way to... 'heal'... this." Greyback said, an unpleasant grin appearing on his face as he stepped closer and unfolded his arms.  
"Did you-..." Draco was amazed at what he saw... and did not smell. "...did you shower?"

Immediately the werewolf's face fell, and he drew his wand; "I don't tolerate mockery."

Before Draco could begin to wonder what _the Monster_ was referring to, he already cast a curse that cut the skin on Draco's abdomen open. It bled-...

..._fuck_ the blood.

It _HURT_!

Draco screamed. He couldn't move in pain but he could scream. The numbness wouldn't come, it should be here any second, it HAD to be here any second because it fucking hurt and THIS MONSTER WAS SPILLING HIS INTESTINES IN HIS PARENTS' BED!

...he appeared to be all out of numbness.

The werewolf flicked his wand about a few more times before closing him up with a stroke of it over the cut.

The pain was quickly echoing away.

Surprised, Draco stroked his hand down over his abdomen.

When it appeared to be all right (the pain was gone!) he sat up and put his shirt down again.

"No 'thank you'?" Greyback snapped.

Draco didn't feel like talking to this freak a split second longer than was absolutely necessary. "No 'sorry'?" he retorted with a glare, getting off the bed and pacing out of his parents' bedroom.

The closer he was to the door, the more scared he felt. It was as if the gravity of the situation was dawning in on him again... he could still practically feel Greyback's nails dig into his hips, and smell that awful breath in his face. Disgusted he went to his room, shut the door behind him firmly and went to his bathroom that he also locked the moment he was inside.

With a flick of his wand he set the remains of his torn underwear on fire, then flushed it.

First thing he did then was go over to the sink. The moment he opened his mouth to brush his teeth he could almost feel and smell Greyback's mouth on his, so he practically emptied the tube of toothpaste onto his toothbrush. He didn't stop brushing until his gums bled and ached; then he let the cold water run.

He splashed some in his face, spit out the minty blood, washed his face some more... The sensation of Greyback's mouth over his nose and mouth was making his stomach turn. He hadn't eaten a single thing all day though.

He got a washing cloth and scrubbed his face with the cold water as thoroughly as he could. Then he got soap and did it again.

And then again.

Brushing his teeth seemed a good idea then... He didn't taste minty freshness, he just tasted... mouth.

And blood.

When he was repeating himself for the fifth time with his new bathroom ritual the sobs started coming.

The seventh time he couldn't see his reflection in the upper periphery of his vision any more through the upcoming tears.

The eighth time he tossed his toothbrush against the mirror and broke down.

**He didn't know what time it was when he finally left his room. **He did know though that he must have burnt through five packages of incense by now to get rid of the stench of strangers. It was pretty comfortable there, surrounded by his childhood junk, but he was starving and there really was nothing to eat there.

"Draco," Bellatrix said the moment she spotted him half way down the stairs. "Where is your elf?" She didn't seem pleased.

"Father rid of him years ago, I don't know why." Draco maintained his posture. He didn't feel like showing any _more_ weakness to his aunt.

"What do you eat?" she then asked, obviously annoyed.

Surprised by the question Draco cocked a brow; "...usually? We go out for dinner."

But there was no 'we' any more now, was there?

Bellatrix sighed, and then turned to return to the dining room. Draco looked up at the front door, looking out the windows above it. The sky had the colour of a bruise – he guessed it was about nine, maybe ten in the evening.

With a sigh he turned to follow his aunt. Through the dining room, then into the kitchen.

The kitchen smelled, looked, and sounded like a pub. There were twenty, maybe thirty men there, and there were many different bottles of wine opened and laying on the table. Some of the men were having whiskey or vodka.

None of it was their own.

Draco didn't like this... he didn't like this at all. The wine basement had to be half empty now, assuming this wasn't the first time they drank wine here, and the other drinks had to have been gathered from various liquor cabinets around the house.

Barty Crouch Jr. was now sitting on his mother's seat, his feet on the table and a bottle of wine resting in his lap. He lay his head in his neck when Bellatrix entered the kitchen and stuck out his tongue at her.

She slumped down in the chair next to his and crossed her arms, pouting like a child."I'm hungry," she said, making Crouch chuckle. "Desperate times call for desperate measures, my dear...I've got some protein for you?"

She just glared at him in response, so he sighed.

Draco carefully entered the kitchen further, earning some looks from the Death Eaters who witnessed his initiation.

The chair across the table from Crouch was usually his father's chair... And the only available chair at the moment, since whoever just sat on it just stood up and left. Draco sat down on it.

"Where's Potter then, ferret boy?" Crouch asked, pushing the bottle in his groin slightly. "We were expecting him..." His tongue flicked out like a snake's and his eyes darted to Bellatrix and back to Draco.

"He's in school," Draco replied as neutrally as possible. "With his friends. Having fun."

Crouch chuckled, took a sip from the bottle and then planted it firmly between his thighs. "We're having fun too- aren't we having fun Bella?"

His other hand reached for Bellatrix cleavage and she eyed it and let him... but the moment his fingers touched her skin she took his hand and broke his digit.

Draco would have probably been shocked if he hadn't experienced so many much more awful things earlier that day. He just looked at the situation with half interest... he was hungry.

"You've been staying here for more than a day, haven't you?" Draco asked his aunt. She immediately stopped paying attention to Crouch entirely, despite his screams of pains and disbelief.

"Yes?"

Crouch screams turned to yelps and he took a sip from the bottle he hijacked. Then he planted it back between his legs and used his hand to realign his broken digit.

"What did you eat yesterday?" Draco doubted these people have been going without food for two days.

"Cissy got us food yesterday... And we took some from our previous hideout. We only got here yesterday." Bellatrix' tone wasn't flat, but Draco had trouble determining what it was instead.

"We could eat missy Malfoy," some creepy looking man in the corner said. He was rubbing his hands against each other repeatedly, not looking at anybody, and his salt and pepper coloured hair was dangling in his face in oily strands.

Draco swallowed hard at the suggestion, and gave his aunt a troubled look. She was looking at the man in disgust though, and when the man giggled she got up and slammed her flat hand on the table surface.

"Draco...?" she said in a threateningly low voice, her eyes on the man. "...what do you say you dispose of mister Nippon for us?"

"The name is Case, miss. Case Nippon." Bellatrix ignored his response and turned to Draco, a smile on her face that was almost pleasant. She shut her eyes in a catlike fashion for a second when she placed her other hand on the table as well; "...we shall no longer be requiring his services." She almost purred the response, making Barty Crouch lick his lips more fervently as he reached his freshly healed hand up to her behind.

"...why me?" Draco managed in response, his mind entirely void of thought.

"You've been playing in your room all day dear, it's time to take out the trash now," Bellatrix snapped.

Just when Crouch' face changed from excited to hopeful, she turned to slap him in the face and then walked away.

Fenrir stood in the doorway to the dining room with his arms crossed, watching the scene with interest. Nippon looked at Draco expectantly, and the blonde's eyes widened. He could smell his sweet fear, and he slowly licked his lips at the memory of how good it tasted.

With morbid amusement he witnessed Draco get up and look at Nippon as he nudged his head. Nippon ignored him.

That vermin wasn't good for anything any more... Bellatrix's Cruciatus Curse had once again proven to be too strong for the human mind. It had been amusing to watch though. That woman had a good sense of humour, despite her hating him.

He could smell Crouch's arousal, the stench of Nippon's excretions from earlier still hanging in his pants, the boy's mint blood breath and the incense in his clothes, the wine, the vodka, the whiskey, the wood of the table, the mice hiding in the walls, the people themselves and the dust in the corners. These scents weren't nearly as strong before he washed out his mouth... and they were bothering him.

But that boy urging him to shower despite his state of total shock was more convincing than

anybody else had ever been. Not like many had made the effort though.

The Dark Lord didn't care; he just wanted his dirty work done, and Fenrir was the guy for the job. The Death Eaters didn't care either; they didn't like him of course, but they didn't give a shit about how he smelled or what he looked like. Nor did his men; they did what he wanted because he was their leader, because he knew everything and more about being a werewolf and because he had the wits to get about. His scent had nothing to do with it.

Society had given up on getting him to join years ago. And after his mother died he turned his back on society as well, occasionally smashing a few people to its rock bottom for the sake of it. But then all of a sudden, after innumerable years, a teenage boy _he just raped_ tells him to get a shower?  
'Ironic' wasn't the word.

The boy – Draco – was looking around, trying not to let anyone notice his distress. "Nippon!" Fenrir snapped, making the mad man look up (happily?). "Follow that boy," he added in a growl. "Oh yes sir, please," Nippon said, nodding so deeply it was like he was bowing. "I'll follow him- Hello; what's your name? My name is Case, sir, Case Nippon. At your disposal." The man offered Draco his hand, and Bellatrix cackled at his choice of words. The sound of its pitch was similar to cutlery on ceramics, and Fenrir turned around with a jerk of his head.

"Just-... come on," Draco said, before clearing his throat.  
He could smell the blonde followed – and he could smell even more clearly that Nippon did, too.

"**...what do we do with him?" **Draco asked, standing on the patio with Greyback and 'Case Nippon'. The late September sun had officially begun to set, but it was still pleasantly warm. Despite that, he had his arms crossed over his chest tightly. "We kill him," Greyback responded as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. Draco swallowed – not in shock, but to pretend to have a reason not to respond immediately.

"Who are we killing, gentlemen?" Case asked enthusiastically, rubbing his hands together as if he was eager to do it. Draco looked at him, and then back at Greyback.

Greyback slowly crossed his arms, and inhaled deeply through his nose. Draco kept his eyes on him, and saw from the corners of his eyes that Nippon put his hands on his hips and was looking at the trees in front of them as if he achieved something. "Lovely day to go fishing," he muttered.

"_SHUT UP!_" Draco shouted at the man, shocking himself more than anyone. Case looked at him with big stupid eyes in response, and he could hear Greyback chuckle.

Since Draco's mind was still entirely void of ideas, he took a step forward. Then another, and then he made up his mind and started walking. "I'm not coming! You don't even like me, and I work for _GRINGOTTS _no less_!_" Draco could hear Greyback sigh behind him, and he guessed the wolfman grabbed Nippon in his neck because he could hear a yelp before footsteps commenced. "I will complain to your superiors, gentlemen! This is no way to treat a banana!"

The Malfoys had a beautiful manor, and from where they were now it was visible in a way that showed it in all its glory, may it be from an unusual angle. They had reached the old stables, but there hadn't been a horse here for at least twenty years now. "Oh, Layla would _love_ these," Nippon said, dashing for the stable doors the moment Greyback let go of his neck. Draco's eyes sought Greyback's in the darkness for advice after these words, but the werewolf didn't seem to have heard it.

"Layla?" Draco asked the opened stable doors then, but instead of a response he got a heart-filled exclamation of disappointment from inside.  
"There are no horsies!" Nippon nearly cried when Draco entered, but an annoyed brief glance to the left was all Draco could get himself to respond with.

The man then checked every individual box, kicked around the remaining bits of straw and dirt and then sat down on the floor. "Daddy's sorry hunny, I'll buy you a lovely kitty cat," he mumbled, barely audible over the rustling of his own white suit. "Kitty cats are nice too love, a lovely pussy for daddy's baby, don't grab its tail just pet it sweets. Just pet it." He pressed the palms of his hands in his eyes and leaned his elbows on his knees. "We're fresh out of horsies but a catty poo is nicey too."

'He's got a child...' Draco thought breathlessly, and he turned on his heels to leave the stables. He crossed his arms and looked over the grass field to the trees in the distance. "You do it," he said to Greyback. "You kill him."

From the periphery of his sight Draco could see Greyback nod, enter the stables, and soon after he heard a disgusting 'pop' followed by the rustling of cloth and then a thud.

**Because of Melanie being incredibly stubborn, impatient and brainless, this chapter has not been checked for spelling and grammar so please bare with us.**


	13. Chapter 13: Why not

**I'm sorry to announce Stains is no longer a collaboration – Synderska a.k.a. Melissa has unfortunately left the fandom. Now it's up to me, Melanie, to tell you the dramatic tale of Draco and Ron. I offer you my sincerest apologies for the eternal wait I had to put you through; I solemnly swear I shall NOT abandon Stains (nor Convenient Tremors), no matter HOW many months pass between updates! These stories are far too dear to me. Enjoy!**

_Pardon me while I burst_  
_Pardon me while I burst_

_A decade ago, I never thought I would be at twenty three_  
_On the verge of spontaneous combustion, woe is me_  
_But I guess that it comes with the territory_  
_An ominous landscape of never ending calamity_  
_I need you to hear, I need you to see_  
_That I have had all I can take_  
_And exploding seems like a definite possibility to me_

_So pardon me while I burst into flames_  
_I've had enough of the world and its people's mindless games_  
_So pardon me while I burn and rise above the flame_  
_Pardon me, pardon me, I'll never be the same_

_Not two days ago, I was having a look in a book_  
_And I saw a picture of a guy fried up above his knees_  
_I said, "I can relate", 'cause lately I've been thinking_  
_Of combustication as a welcomed vacation_  
_From the burdens of the planet Earth_  
_Like gravity, hypocrisy and the perils of being in 3D_  
_But thinking so much differently_

_So pardon me while I burst into flames_  
_I've had enough of the world and its people's mindless games_  
_So pardon me while I burn and rise above the flame_  
_Pardon me, pardon me, I'll never be the same_  
_I'll never be the same_

_Pardon me while I burst into flames_  
_Pardon me, pardon me, pardon me_

_So pardon me while I burst into flames_  
_I've had enough of the world and its people's mindless games_  
_So pardon me while I burn and rise above the flame_  
_Pardon me, pardon me, I'll never be the same_

_Pardon me, I'll never be the same, yeah_

'Pardon me' by Incubus.

* * *

**When Ron saw a slim blond Slytherin walk ahead of him on the way to the Great Hall **his heart skipped a beat and the blood drained from his face. His initial response was to run and hide in the depths of the Black Lake, but as he regained his brain function he realised he would have to man up and deal with the situation. But that was difficult! He had been mourning Draco's untimely death the entire weekend now, he couldn't just think him alive again! Maybe it was someone under Polyjuice potion? Or the normal Draco on a mission of vengeance?  
Harry and him had scarcely managed to keep their plan and its consequences to themselves, what if Draco would fess up now and ruin everything? No – he'd give himself away too. What was Ron to do!

His sleepy brain said 'having breakfast' seemed like a great start.  
Once at the table he got to have a good look at Draco. The boy seemed grey and a bit mousy, though he also seemed unresponsive to the people around him – even to Pansy. When Draco didn't look in his direction at all, the smells of food then beckoned and distracted Ron until Harry showed up out of NOWHERE and patted his shoulder.

"It seems your boyfriend is back," he said in a tone Ron couldn't quite place, "Looks like they didn't kill him after all."

"What if this is someone under Polyjuice potion?" Ron hissed back, unable to help some crumbs getting on Harry's robes. "That would mean he's still alive too," Harry responded, sounding a bit dark now, "Though I doubt it. I think he's on a different mission now, and that he's going to kill us both. We should talk to Dumbledore about thi-"

"_No!_" A load of chewed bread fell from Ron's mouth, and Hermione who had been eyeing them from opposite the table then left, "We're not reporting _anything_, you hear me? ALL the previous years we've done your dangerous shit without help from any teacher whatsoever, there is no way you're going to get _my boyfriend_ into trouble. Understood?"  
Harry just stared at him and shook his head, absent-mindedly patting the chewed food from his knee. Then he leaned in and lowered his tone, so both Seamus and Dean had to lean in to hear what they were saying. "He's attempted to murder me Ron... and he might be trying to kill you as well now. What we did before isn't relevant right now." Ron quietly glared back at him.  
"He already killed a boy. You told me that, remember?"  
Ron felt his expression fall.

"Who knows what they put him through there."

A sob rose in Ron's throat.

"Who knows what they're asking of him now."

"He didn't try to murder you," Ron tried in a choked up voice.

"He was going to send me into a nest of Death Eaters, regardless of what would have happened to me. You _know _it would have killed me."

Ron tried to nod, but he wasn't sure if it came off right. "I- yeah." he said sorrowfully as he got up. "Where are you going?" Dean asked. Ron was too stricken to be surprised by anyone other than Harry calling him on it. "..need a pill..." he mumbled vaguely, getting another slice of bread off the table first. Harry grabbed his sleeve and got his attention; "After that we'll report him. Yes?"

Ron nodded.

**Draco may have been feeling forlorn, that did not mean he was going to let go of the direction of his life.** There was no way he was going to Azkaban. Not now, not ever. What he had to do was ensure his stay in the castle. Soon after breakfast that Monday, he had been summoned and escorted by Snape to Dumbledore's office. After an extensive conversation with both these men, in which Draco had to confess he was a Death Eater and he had been forced to kill a person for his initiation, the Aurors had been contacted. Naturally Draco had shown that he regretted having been forced to both the aforementioned facts, but it made no difference. The Aurors had been on the brink of taking him to Azkaban when Draco played his final card. He had spent the entire weekend thinking of how he could prevent being sent off to Azkaban upon his return, and with a bit of help of his parents' library he had discovered the way: According to British Wizarding Law, children up to the age of 17 have the right to a complete education. Draco was sixteen years old now and his birthday wasn't until early June- and even then his education wasn't complete until he got to finish the final year of Hogwarts.  
The following days were spent travelling to and fro the ministry of magic, being interrogated, threatened and bluffed to by numerous lawyers, jurors and judges. Draco chose to not speak to any of his peers during this period, preventing anybody from finding out the situation. Thankfully Snape was by his side throughout the ordeal, along with Dumbledore's approval. That did not take away the fact that by Tuesday, the Daily Prophet had already reported of a student Death Eater within Hogwarts walls. Therefore during Tuesday supper Dumbledore had no choice but to make an announcement:

"As you are probably aware, my speech at the beginning of the year has proven to have been made overdue." He paused for a moment to let the gravity of this statement sink in, "The Daily Prophet has been correct in reporting that one amongst you has fallen victim to the Dark Side. Considering this student's only other option would have been an untimely death, he has chosen to become a Death Eater." Unlike Draco expected, there was hardly a murmur starting at these words. However; he did feel an increasing amount of eyes upon him... "When the official interrogations have come to a conclusion, I shall inform you all of the consequences. Until then I bid you all to remain calm."

Calm they remained, but Draco could tell that they knew enough already by the way they (didn't) look at him.

By Friday it had been decided that Draco was to finish his education at the school as anticipated, save he would have to consider Azkaban 'home' during the holidays.  
By Saturday he dared to establish his first eye contact with Ron since his betrayal.

After the initial shock of seeing Draco again, Ron had been relieved to know he was alive. But after that, he had just gotten nervous. He felt a great deal for the boy but he was too scared to act upon it... especially now everybody knew Draco was a Death Eater. But when Draco locked eyes with him in the Great Hall that Saturday, all those nerves evaporated. The butterflies in his stomach rose from their coma and his breath caught in his throat for a second. Without another thought he got up from the table and started to walk towards Draco, who also got up from his seat and went to the doors.

**The door of the otherwise abandoned classroom hadn't even fully closed yet when Ron embraced Draco.** When the other didn't move, Ron slowly let go again and tried to catch his eyes. "I am _so _sorry," Ron said with a broken voice after a few seconds. Draco crossed his arms and swallowed. It appeared he was intent on getting the other as uncomfortable as possible, and he attempted to do so by maintaining eye contact. Ron didn't know what to do – he was glad to see the other alive, but he didn't know what to say or do! Nothing was going to be right, was it? "I-... I never meant for you to get hurt, I just... Harry said that-... " tears were welling up in his eyes now, "-the Sorting Hat had no doubt to sort you so you couldn't be brave enough to see me with all the danger, and-... " he snorted "I believed him, because he's _always _right, like Hermione, and I thought-... I don't really _know_ you... do I?"  
While Ron was desperately attempting to 'read' Draco's expression, Draco was busy mustering the equanimity to respond. He hadn't anticipated speaking in any other way than stating facts would be this difficult... and seeing Weasley's weeping face wasn't helping. After a good ten seconds of him trying to get used to the sight of Ron wiping tears off his face with the back of his sleeve he had had enough of it. "You knew that they were going to kill my mother, and you knew that they would probably kill me..." His voice broke at the beginning of that sentence, but that didn't stop him; "...and you decided I deserved that, simply because you weren't sure how well you '_knew'_ me?" The breathy voice was now venomous. "How can you _stand_ there blubbering like an idiot when _YOU _are not the one who has_ LOST. EVERYTHING_?"  
"I'-...Draco, I'm sorry, I didn't m-" Ron tried to embrace Draco again. He wasn't sure why, it was an instinctive move. But Draco recoiled, his breathing no more than fast hiccups. Ron watched him for a moment, then couldn't stand the sight of it anymore. "What have they done to you?" he asked carefully, "...do you want to talk about it?"

"Wh-" Draco stopped to regain his breath. So far he had managed to keep his tears to himself and he insisted on keeping it that way. "Why would I trust you?" He asked, sounding razor sharp. Inside he was quaking but he refused to give the Weasel a piece of it. "You're fickle as a leaf in the wind, unreliable! I'm not 'Potter'-" he spat the name,"-returning from some heroic adventure! You want me to talk? I'll talk; I have _seen my mother die_ and saw my family home desecrated by murderers and rapists, I have _witnessed_ my rapist kill a person and I have _butchered_ _our peacocks_...!" Spitting the words to shock the other boy lost its appeal rapidly, and Draco suddenly felt overwhelmed by hopelessness. Perhaps Ron wincing at about every other word had something to do with it, perhaps it was realising how meaningless the words seemed compared to the events they referred to. Either way he felt he had to sit down.

Ron's tears now went ignored as his eyes were on Draco, who looked like he was about to faint. Just as he opened his mouth to ask if he was okay, Draco spoke again; "And when _you _get to go _home_ to your _family _in about two months, _I _will be in Azkaban with my father who doesn't want me." His demeanour wasn't nearly as sharp now. He seemed weak, if anything. "Wait 'till I tell him what happened to mother, I'm sure he'll be delighted..." he mumbled as he sat down on one of the desks.  
It was quiet between them now. Not awkward but tense.  
"...I'm sorry." Ron said meekly after a while. "I'm a shit friend... and unreliable too, you're right." For the next bit he scraped together all his courage: "B-ut... I really I am in love with you and I would like another chance." There, that may have come out a bit too fast and slightly jumbled, but at least it was said.  
Draco looked at him as if he was something smelly. "The only reason I am alive today is because they expected me to fail. That's why they hadn't yet summoned the Dark Lord who would have killed me – or had me killed, I should say."  
Ron just looked at him sadly and expectantly.

Draco sighed: "I was a fool to trust you." he nodded quietly to himself, ignoring Ron's eyes upon him. Somehow he felt comfortable being here together with him. Somehow, he didn't blame him for what had happened. He knew that if Ron would have been loyal he would be in a whole different situation now, but he didn't feel like Ron was to blame. It was Potter who had really been behind this... and besides: Draco should have known better than to underestimate the years-long friendship between the Gryffindors. Plus, they had been hating him together all that time, hadn't they? No wonder Potter had so easily persuaded Ron.  
"...I'm sorry, but..." Ron started, fairly suddenly looking incredibly disturbed, "...did you really say 'my rapist'? When you – just now...?"  
After a few seconds of processing the question Draco barely nodded. He had intended to skip that part – he hadn't even told Dumbledore and Snape about it. He hadn't seen Pomfrey at all despite the professors' pushing: he was horrified she might be able to piece together what had happened from the marks on his hips. The slight infection had started to fade now and there was semi-healthy looking crust on them so he had stopped worrying. Perhaps, someday, if Ron and him would somehow be naked together again he could shock him with them. Show him what he'd caused. If ever.  
"Merlin, Draco... I am so sorry..." Ron gasped.  
'_As if it's worse than watching Mother die,_' Draco thought bitterly as he quietly looked at Ron's knees.  
"I'm so sorry... Did it-... _Who_ did it?" Weasley asked as he swallowed and wiped his final tears away. He still seemed miserable but at least he finally got a hold of himself.  
"Greyback," Draco responded quietly. "He was also the one who killed-... the person I was supposed to kill. Because aunt Bellatrix told me to. ...because I asked him to." He was still dully staring at Ron's knees when he added: "He's not so bad." The words surprised him as they came out of his mouth, but they seemed to surprise Ron much more. "He's a _werewolf_! _He_ is the one who made _Remus_ a werewolf! What if you're one too?"  
Draco shook his head but hesitated to speak. "I'm not sure..."  
"You're not sure?" Ron exclaimed, eyes bulging. "Did you mix body fluids?"  
Draco's response took a while... Or his vocal response did, because his face took an unhealthy shade of grey instantly. "I think so... It could have all bled out, could've-... Maybe he had that crap under his nails too, I've got no idea..." He sounded insecure and small, very unlike himself.  
Ron couldn't stand the sight of the other sitting there so meekly anymore. Carefully he stepped over to Draco and put a hand on his shoulder. When the other let him, he became bolder and pulled him off the table, closer, so he could hug him.

**When Draco told Snape about his suspected lycantrophy,** he was surprised to find the professor's eyes narrow the way they did. Without another word he grabbed Draco's sleeve by the shoulder and dragged him along the corridors, straight to the Hospital Wing. Draco let him – he wasn't going to speak if he didn't absolutely have to. How could he not have thought of this possibility? Of course a _lot_ had happened since the Friday afternoon of his betrayal, but that wasn't an excuse! He had entirely forgotten lycantrophy could spread regardless of whether it was saliva or semen mixing with his blood. But Greyback hadn't been transformed at the time, had he? Draco took a deep breath: perhaps it was nothing and Snape was being dramatic. When they entered Pomfrey was just done healing a hyperactive Gryffindor who had apparently been suffering from a nosebleed.

"Poppy," Snape said as he swung Draco in front of him by his sleeve, "Test him for lycantrophy."  
Madam Pomfrey nearly dropped the vial she'd been holding when she turned to face the Slytherins.  
"Lyc-... Where is your bite? How long has it been?" she asked, as she tried to visually examine Draco through his clothes. "There is no bite," Draco said, gathering courage as he spoke. "There are some scratches and -" his voice got stuck in his throat as he moved his pants trousers down low enough for the mediwitch to see. Four nearly identical lines on each hip, obviously made by big human hands with long nails. Snape had been making certain the Gryffindor took his leave, and was now looking at the marks with poorly concealed horror. "And?" Pomfrey asked, going over to Draco and looking to the marks closer. "Those don't look like bite marks..." she said as she narrowed her eyes to think.  
Draco cleared his throat: "Greyback...-" He couldn't get himself to say the words to these people... he only accidentally managed to tell Ron! Carefully he attempted to position his hands the way Greyback's hands had been on his hips. His own fingertips were nearly as broad as the crusts were now and his fingers weren't quite as far apart, but from the way his hands and arms were now positioned it wasn't hard to guess how these marks had come about.  
"They're nearly healed!" Pomfrey said in a frantic voice after realisation had dawned in on her. "If you got infected through those there's nothing I can do for you, it will have already spread through your bloodstream!"

"I don't know, that's just it!" Draco responded, sounding more like a child attempting to prevent an argument than a teenager who sees all chance of a decent future shattered. "He tore me apart too, but that has been healed because it-... incapacitated me too much."

Much to Draco's horror, Pomfrey sat down on a nearby bed at these words. "I'm so sorry boy... but there is no way to tell until after the first full moon. If you've got it, if it's been healed-... it has already spread, there's no point in trying to clean the virus out."  
"_Surely _you must have got a cure?" he snapped at her suddenly, despair raging like anger. "He wasn't transformed! I haven't noticed a _thing_, _surely_ there's still time until it's hopeless?" Pomfrey didn't respond. "Right?" Draco asked, eyes now on Snape. The professor slightly shook his head.

After a few seconds of Draco's mind trying to incorporate this 'information', Pomfrey got off the bed and went over to the cupboard by the door. "I could give you some reading on what to expect,... but I fear that's the best I can do for you," she said, looking for a particular book.  
"Never mind that," Snape said briskly before leaving the Hospital Wing. Draco followed him back to the dungeons without another word. Draco waited outside Snape's office as Snape was inside until he got a book thrust into his hands. Instantly he looked up at his head of house who opened his mouth as if he was about to speak, didn't, and then closed his office door.  
Draco looked down at the familiar-looking book. It was 'The Essential Defence Against the Dark Arts', by Arsenius Jigger.

**The remainder of that Saturday was spent at a desk, surrounded by library books, accompanied by Pansy and Daphne** who had no idea what was going on. For all they knew Draco was making some assignment to help him catch up on the classes he had been missing the past week. He did actually have such assignments... but with the full moon only 4 days away it was in his own best interest to focus on studying what he could soon experience.

His parchment so far read:  
_Until first transformation: nothing. First transformation is worst (hormones settling etc.).  
After transformation: exhausted (all reserves used up).  
Build up over month, full moon close → energy high. Specs. differ per person.  
In 30 years definitely normal throughout month (except ±2 nights around transformation)._

"Draco... why do you suppose they chose _green _for Slytherin? Isn't it the envy-colour?" Daphne asked him out of the blue. Draco looked up, disoriented for a moment. When his gaze crossed Pansy's she smiled warmly at him until he had found Daphne, who hadn't stopped talking during his 'search', "Why didn't they choose purple? Or turquoise or something, or just- hold on! WHY are we the only secondary colour? It's not fair, is it?" Draco's semi-neutral mood quickly dropped.  
"Daphne, let him work," Pansy snapped. "I am!" Daphne replied in disbelief, "I just want a quick answer right? So;..?"  
Draco looked at her whilst waiting for her to finish her sentence, but nothing came. "Quick answer to what...?" he asked with poorly suppressed annoyance. "Why _green?_" Daphne asked, her eyes narrowed as if she were considering a conspiracy theory – which might very well have been the case. "Wasn't it Slytherin's favourite colour or something...?" he answered in a tone that made it more than clear he didn't give a damn right now, "Would you do me a favour?" he then asked in the same tone. Daphne nodded enthusiastically so Draco spat in his sharpest tone: "Would you _leave_?" "Sure!" Daphne responded, much to his surprise. "See ya later Pans!" the brunette said as she waved, making her way towards the door.  
Pansy instantly scooted closer to him on her chair. "She's a pain, isn't she?" she said confidentially. Draco ignored it: "You have stuck with me the past few days even though I haven't told you a word of what's going on. Why?" Pansy seemed caught: "Well... I'... you're my friend, and if there ever was a rough patch in your life it's _now_..." - she leaned in as she spoke- "Plus, you know I've always had a bit of a 'thing' for you... " Her apparent devotion made him uncomfortable, but he tried not to let it show. "You trust me no matter what, don't you?" he asked after a moment of silence. Somehow the gravity of the question seemed to dawn in on her, and she nodded. "You wouldn't leave my side, regardless of what's going on?" he asked in an even more confidential tone. "Ye- no! I wouldn't leave! Draco, why are you asking me all this?"

"**...and then he said Greyback wasn't so bad."** Ron concluded. "...sounds like Battered Person Syndrome to me," Hermione said, without looking up from her book. Harry and Ron exchanged a glance before looking at her. She kept on reading for another few seconds, then sighed in an annoyed fashion. Ron was certain it was an act – she only ever spoke to rub in how much more she knew than them, didn't she?  
"It's a psychological phenomenon similar to Stockholm Syndrome. Do you know what _that_ is?" She didn't look up, though Ron could tell her eyes had stopped racing over the pages. Harry shook his head in response but Ron just waited,  
"Stockholm Syndrome is when someone is held captive, and then develops a bond with the captor simply because the captor didn't harm them." Ron opened his mouth to remind Hermione that Greyback _did _harm Draco, but she didn't give him the chance: "Battered Person Syndrome is when the captive has been injured but not _killed_ and develops this bond... Both syndromes are rare and require a lot of emotion to evolve." She shut her book and looked straight into Ron's eyes. "Or perhaps, of course, he just likes Greyback."  
Harry, who hadn't spoken much during Ron's report, suddenly turned on Ron as well. "What if he _wanted_ to be a werewolf?" He asked it as if it was an incredibly clever find... and Ron wanted to punch him: "He doesn't! He _hates_ Greyback, but he just-..."  
"Why would you listen to him?" Hermione interrupted at the same moment Harry said "You just said he said he wasn't so bad!"  
Ron felt hot anger rise. These people were insufferable! _Why_ had he told them _anything_? "You can hate people that aren't so bad! Think about-..." the two of them were looking at him expectantly, "Er... Colin Creevey!"  
"I don't hate Colin..." Harry started, slightly amazed, "...and you can _hardly _compare him to-" Hermione continued, but Ron had heard enough. "_Shut up!_" He wanted to add that if they weren't going to believe him, he wasn't going to tell them anything anymore, but Hermione decided to bitch in before he could. "You've _betrayed_ him, Ron... He has no reason to be honest with you."  
Ron left the room, still mad, and pretended not to have heard Hermione...But her words haunted him throughout the night.

**Wednesday, the day before Halloween, Draco sat down on the broken and dusty remains of a bed **in the Shrieking Shack. He had stopped worrying about how clean his clothes were since he'd been dragged through his own filth by a man who'd never showered. It was late in the afternoon and Pansy had brought a basket full of food 'so it's like a picnic', and Ron stood beside Snape awkwardly as she put a square cloth on the dusty floor and started unloading it.  
"When he displays even slightly unusual behaviour, the two of you leave instantly." Snape concluded, staring into Draco's eyes. Ron nodded awkwardly, but Pansy let out a nearly cheerful "Yes, sir!" Without wasting another second Snape turned briskly and marched out, back to the safety of the castle.  
Ron was scared. Terrified. He remembered what had happened the last time he was here, and how Snape had actually been the one to break the bed. How scared Snape had turned out to be of werewolves... and now it was Pansy, Draco, and him. No Sirius, no Snape, not even Hermione! Just the three of them and the huge chance of one of them becoming a werewolf within the next hour or so.  
After a few minutes Pansy sat down on a corner of the cloth, and Draco got off the bed and chose the corner opposing her. She served pumpkin soup from a small portable cauldron into a bowl and handed it to him with a warm smile. He took it quietly and waited. Ron had just witnessed this small scene and felt sad. When Pansy put another full bowl in front of one of the empty corners, Ron finally took place there. Then she served herself and handed the boys something which Ron later realised were cheese-croissants. "Is this it?" Ron asked softly without paying much attention to what he was holding. Pansy glared at him instantly, but Draco just sat differently and nodded: "I asked for something light, so we can go back to the castle for supper when I turn out to be fine." This caused Pansy to look at him in a slightly confused fashion, so in a sigh he added; "...and if I turn out to be a monster, you'll be so sick of concern you'd be glad you haven't eaten more."  
Pansy nodded and looked down at her croissant; "Plus... maybe the beast won't be so strong if it hasn't eaten well..." she said in what Ron guessed was her usual tone. Draco sighed in a way very appropriate for condoning nonsense and he raised his bowl of soup. "To my humanity."  
"To you!" Pansy raised her bowl too, and Ron half-heartedly followed.

Apart from the sounds of their actual eating and one suppressed burp from Pansy, they had their tea in silence. Afterwards they didn't say much either – it was obvious from their very demeanour they were waiting for something."Did you tell them where you went?" Draco then asked Ron, who looked at him in obliviousness. "Potter and Granger, do they know?"  
"Oh! Yeah, I told them." Draco nodded, and Pansy looked from Ron back to the cloth they were sitting on. "Do you feel anything yet?" She asked after a few seconds, turning her gaze to Draco who shook his head in response. "Not even nervous?" she asked, and again he shook his head; "There is absolutely no point in being nervous over something I've got no control over." Pansy nodded in an 'understanding' fashion, and slightly nervously looked out the window. It appeared dawn had set in, and Ron changed the pose of his legs. There was something scurrying over the floor upstairs, making a few dust particles seer and scatter. Suddenly he just _had_ to know, had to know how important she was before Draco might tear himself to pieces. "Did you tell her everything? Does she know?"  
Pansy's eyes were immediately upon him and then flashed. "I'm sure he has, he knows I care and I wouldn't betray him." she said sharply, eyes on Draco who was now looking at the cloth. "Know _what_?" Draco retorted, sounding 'mean' as he locked eyes with Ron. "She obviously knows I may be infected, what else is there?"  
"Not how?" Ron asked nearly desperately, "Like what he did to maybe turn you?"  
"No." Pansy said shortly, "Just _that_ he did... I didn't ask. Draco would tell me if there's anything else he wants to tell me."

Draco eyes rested on Pansy for a moment, then slowly moved to Ron where they remained. "I think it's starting... You should go."  
"I mention what happened and you 'suddenly' feel something," Ron said in an annoyed tone, getting to his feet. "Maybe it's just feeling bad because of what happened, not transforming." Draco remained where he was and shook his head; "I think I know what 'feeling bad' is like by now, Weasley..."  
Pansy jumped up at those words and grabbed Ron by the upper arm. "Come on!" she said, pulling him towards the door. He was too busy looking at Draco though, wondering if he had the right to retort as he tried to free himself. "He _said_ to leave him," she said a little less nicely, pinching him as she tried to pull him along again. "But he just-" "_Leave_ him!" she interrupted, pinching even harder. When she drew her wand Ron complied, and she let go to let him walk for himself. A poorly suppressed moan came from behind them and they increased their pace, not even slowing down when they reached the tunnel with the treacherous low dirt ceiling. When they had safely reached the Whomping Willow they both stopped as if by command and turned around, careful to avoid the range of the tree's branches.  
"...it's horrible leaving him like this." Pansy said after nearly a minute as she stroked her hair behind her ear, hoping it would calm her nerves. Her poor, poor Draco was practically an orphan... and now his beautiful body might be about to temporarily lose its humanity and she and this Flubberworm could sit here and listen and scrape up the pieces. Not like she could do anything about it... Weasley shifted his weight awkwardly, and appeared to be unsure of what to do. "...Maybe we should just...wait. Until we're sure," Pansy then suggested, turning to the other with something like a smile on her face. She didn't like Weasley – there was something about him that annoyed her terribly. She wasn't sure if it was his daft facial features, or his apparent helplessness in just about any situation that did it... But Draco wanted him, so what was she to do? Thankfully – to her own surprise- she wasn't jealous of him. After all; Draco had allowed her to do so much more since he was dating _him!_ Now if only she could prevent Weasel from fucking up again, perhaps there would be a happy ending to this.  
He looked at her and seemed to agree, so she sat down on the cold grass and started picking some. Keeping her hands busy kept her calm.  
Ron followed her lead after a few seconds, sitting down on the grass gracelessly and staring helplessly in the general direction of the Shrieking Shack. The building was indistinguishable because of the dawn, which made him stare all the more intently. Draco was just upset - _just_ upset. That was what Ron told himself and that was what he was going to think _so _hard it would become true.

**Bees were buzzing through his veins.** Draco had fainted before in his life and it had given him a similar sensation... but then it hadn't lasted this long. He tried to keep his eyes focussed on his hands, while at the same time attempting to peer at the full moon through the cracks in the wooden wall. It was difficult to tell whether this feeling was caused by nerves, or by the real deal. After all, there was no way to tell if he had gotten infected, was there? And if he had – how bad it was? Perhaps he had caught a mild version, a version that wasn't completely life-wrecking. Or maybe he just got AIDS and he could be cured easily. _Or!_ Maybe... he was already dead! And this was Hell! The Vanishing Cabinet hadn't transported him; it had just torn his body and his soul apart and what he was going through now was a final hallucination that only _seemed _to last longer than a split second. That would mean that the pain he was now feeling was caused by his body being healed somehow. Yes, it made sense that it appeared to begin in the core of his bones, spreading rapidly throughout his body, because they were making his mind connect to his body again! What _else_ could explain this heavy, black pain that seemed to take over any possible thought? It was engulfing him and he felt himself sink away until there was nothing _but_ the pain, the sensation of his heart coming to a halt as hair grew so quickly it_ sickened_ him, he heaved and vomited and tried to stand and _mum I love you I have no idea how this could have happened_ the bees were still in his ears _tormenting him_ and he shook his head to make them go -_leave –_ and let him be and _his father was at his bed in the Hospital Wing and everything was FINE _and he had _no idea _how this could have happened, _a misunderstanding I'm so sorry_ and _it's good that Ron can't see me now I'm in a right state_ and maybe if he could get his wand from the castle _wait where am I _ he could clean up these shreds of cloth and _ help _ and_ am I dying?_and he felt his entire being become compressed.

He receded into himself, away from the blackness of pain and misery that reached out to him. It was as if he shrunk; his _existence_ shrunk to the point where his birth became undone and he was nothing. Not a thing remained for there was only peace and quiet in this womb of the world.

By the time the transformation was complete, the _Hatred_ was all that was left of him.


End file.
